


You Matter⇾

by Sie_zZ



Category: Abuse - Fandom - Fandom, Angst - Fandom, Gay - Fandom, Kidnapping - Fandom, PoorKatsuki - Fandom, Torture - Fandom, Viktuuri - Fandom, Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime), boyxboy - Fandom
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-26
Updated: 2019-06-26
Packaged: 2020-05-20 09:01:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 42
Words: 41,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19373503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sie_zZ/pseuds/Sie_zZ
Summary: |Things never got this bad, and when it felt like it might ... They both got through it together. |"Don't call yourself that ... Yuuri, you've never been just that."I think something's wrong."How could you possibly question my devotion when I've been searching this whole time?"✗ ✗ ✗This is my second book, I've learned from a few mistakes and hope I do better this time!|⚠ W A R N I N G ⚠|If you are sensitive to slightly visual rape, abuse, suicide mentions, etc.✗ ✗ ✗





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> ✗ ✗ ✗ 
> 
> • This the second fanfiction I've ever made so there are a few warnings and things you must know about this book.
> 
> • Of course as you may have known; I'm somewhat known for making a certain boy named Yuuri Katsuki to go through the worst pain possible, and seeing as I have yet to come across an angsty fanfiction that involves rape, torture, angst, smut, and a little fluff than what's the harm in giving it a try myself? My first time writing and publishing a story here I know I made a couple people shed at least one tear for Yuuri's sake so I'll be trying to bring you to tears once more. 
> 
> • This is also a trigger warning seeing as this story contains things such as; physical/emotional abuse, along with mention of suicide, kidnapping, rape, torture, etc. 
> 
> If you're offended by any of the content here; I shall not be held responsible here. 
> 
> • Hope You Enjoy!
> 
> ✗ ✗ ✗

"So what? He's Phichit! It's not like he meant it in ... that kind of way. And we were all drunk, how was I supposed to know what I was doing?"  
Yuuri snarled, staring at another upset glare as his husband ran his fingers through his hair in frustration.

"Well if you hadn't even decided to go all in and had one too many drinks then I don't think I would have found my husband in the corner with his best friend making out, now would I Yuuri?"  
Yuuri knew he was right, but he wanted to have fun for a change after months of hard training. Was that so wrong? Viktor should understand his side too. It didn't matter. None of it did really, why were they arguing over something so trivial?

"That's not what I—" Yuuri groans spinning around on his heels and stomping out of the room. He placed a hand on the front door's knob before being interrupted by his husband, the Viktor Nikiforov.

"Where are you going?"  
Deciding it'd be best to ignore Viktor's random desperateness, Yuuri hanks the door open with no other thought in his mind but to get away.  
"Why would you care anyway? If you want to talk ... meet me at the bar we used to go to by 9, no more no late. I just need time to myself right now."  
Before Viktor could argue back Yuuri swiftly slams the door behind him.

Viktor felt his heartthrob with pain. Normally Yuuri wasn't so easily upset with him nor was he, but seeing his husband kissing someone in a corner of an empty club wasn't exactly forgivable. Why doesn't he understand that? Why was this argument over something so stupid? It'll all be over anyway, they just need to talk it out like always. The bar we always go to huh? ...

\--

He raised the object to his lips before taking a sip, letting the strong liquid flow into his mind. Yuuri leans forward, pressing his elbows against the cold countertop of the lonely bar resting his head in his palms. 

"Who does he think he is? I can have fun whenever I want to ..." He spat, taking another large gulp of his drink. How long has it been since he's left Viktor alone at their apartment? Hours, minutes? Regardless of the time, he couldn't tell.  
"E -excuse me, sir?"  
A small tap was placed on the slightly drunken boy's shoulder. He was met with the same pair of eyes as his as husband's, except they were darker and less full of enjoyment, rather another emotion. Hmm?

"Hey, Yuuri!"  
He was met with a pair of light brown eyes much like his own, but they were filled with excitement while he was of boredom.

Minamooooo—" Yuuri slurs trying to keep his sight focused on his beloved fan and friend, trying his hardest to seem like he was having a good time while he was keeping to himself.  
"—Who's your friend?~" He hiccups profoundly.  
Minami tilts his head staring at a drunken Yuuri before backtracking, taking a look around whilst ignoring the question.

"Where's Viktor? You two are normally always together."  
The Japanese male slouches back down in his stool no longer caring for Minami's presence. Damn kids don't know how to recognize the mood! He resumes resting his chin back into his hand. Yuuri was sure Viktor was still at the apartment. Sure it was true he wanted to give a sober answer this time but instead, he ignored Minami swirling his empty cup around using his index finger.  
"Doesn't mattah, I still didn't get an answer about your new frwends though ..."  
The yellow and red-haired boy smiles brightly at the mention of his new friend.  
"We met at the ice rink me and my mom used to visit! We started talking and suddenly my phone started exploding with notifications!"  
The small male began, now taking a step forward and enthusiastically gesturing towards his friend.  
"It was the same day Viktor proposed to you!! It was so amazing! You smiled and he and you were all like..." 

Minami began rambling as Yuuri zoned out paying attention to his still empty liquor glass. He had no intention of thinking of Viktor while he was trying to have ... "fun," but instead, he just felt depressed after hearing how he had proposed to him. Swirling around the new toxic the bartender sat in-front of him hearing an overly joyful Minami in the background, he began being swallowed into his thoughts.  
"Oh!—"  
Minami started as a slight weight was felt on Yuuri's shoulder.  
"—And that's William! He's a pretty big fan of you too! That's pretty much why we're friends, but don't tell him that." Minami whispers in his ear.

Yuuri looks over his shoulder and the hand resting on his shoulder before taking a look at William. He resembled an average American kid smiling down at his childhood superhero and who was he to blame him for looking so naïve? He was the same, probably still is.  
His dark round glasses glinted for a second and he swore he'd seen something else in his eye but soon shook it off and raised out an arm to shake to his new acquaintance.  
"Nice to meet you, William." He grinned at his fan thinking nothing more of him.

\--

Minami soon left, leaving him and William alone. Yuuri couldn't take his eyes off of his empty glass, swirling it around contemplating whether he should spend more of his cash on drinks. "Um ..." The young teenager shook nervously staring at his idol. Yuuri Katsuki, The Yuuri Katsuki. I'm finally meeting him and he doesn't even look interested in me at all ...  
"You're a foreigner, right?—" Yuuri began, not taking his eyes away from the object he was swirling around. "—I can speak English, most skaters have to if they want to chat with others. I keep Japanese for my family and Viktor mainly."

William gently nods his head, taking a seat next to him deciding not to try and make eye contact with his uninterested idol. "The Katsuki Yuuri huh? How is he any different from a depressed guy sitting in a bar, a-am I right? ..." The boy chuckles halfheartedly at his dried up joke and cursed himself under his breath. William took a deep breath before exhaling filling his lungs with the confidence he needed. "Was it Viktor?"  
The Japanese male sighs and slowly nodding while still looking forward. There was an awkward silence between the two. 

 

The boy's glasses glinted again and he slowly turned his head to Yuuri's uninterested glare at the shelf in front of him.

"This is actually pretty amusing. You guys actually fought today, was it a silly lovers quarrel? It makes me wonder ..."

 

Viktor walks in looking around ambiguously. It'd been around 9:00 pm now. Once he made his way further to the bar he seen a boy with roundish glasses and red eyes, next to him was his lover staring at the boy. 

 

" ... How much would it take to break you both?"  
The glass stopped swirling, and suddenly Yuuri was interested in what he was saying.  
"You can't be serious, right? Who says that to a complete stranger?" Yuuri tries explaining disinterestedly. Now I've peaked your interest huh? Ugh, when it's about Viktor ... Disgusting.

William smirks now completely staring at Yuuri. He leaned forward on the counter, smoothly placing a hand on his face. The air was tense and Yuuri didn't move an inch.  
"Oh, Yuuri...I know everything about you, it's no surprise that I just so managed to bump into one of your friends."

Yuuri continued swirling the glass once more.

"You're like 12 ..." 

There was a sudden slam before Yuuri could process what was happening his small frame was pushed back and an arm rested on the side of his head. He was now leaning his back on the counter, William had one hand on his shoulder, and the other on the counter beside his face.  
"Want to try me, piggie?" Did he just try to sound like Yurio?  
Yuuri stared at the boy in disgust. His mind wouldn't stop screaming 'danger' and his eyes couldn't stop staring at William.

"I suggest you come with me, you don't want your precious idol getting hurt, right? I'll make him hurt. I've been waiting to make him hurt ever since the day he proposed to you. The media, the living together, the being together. It's been haunting me. All you are, all you were—"  
His words cut through the air straight into Yuuri's face. This was the first time he'd had to deal with someone like him. He did nothing but stare, until...

"—was a fan."  
William chuckles.  
This was one of the best days of his miserable boring life, tears of joy left his eyes and they fluttered shut in a burst of laughter. A fan! I'm a fan, he's my idol, so our new relationship should work out perfectly, right? He thought sarcastically. 

"G -get off.."  
Yuuri brushed off his words. Then stood up, shoving William back and grabbing his collar until their faces were inches apart. 

"Don't you ever...ever taunt me, or talk to me about my husband like we're your goddamn toys."  
He then pushed William back until his foot caught onto a stool and he fell back. 

Regardless of who William might be, regardless of if he was slightly upset with Viktor for not seeing his side, regardless of if he was simply a fan of his soul mate whom he had watched only on TV before becoming his lover. He was absolutely not going to let someone toy with him or his husband's emotions. "Sorry, but I think our conversation is over ..."

——

"Sorry?"

"..."

"Yuuri ..."

"I'm sorry ..."

Yuuri draws out a small sigh, looking away from his partner. Overall, he knew it was just Phichit and Viktor should have known as well that he meant no harm to Yuuri or their relationship, but getting so shrouded up inside his own mind made him realize how immature the situation really was. It was absurd, and Yuuri knew it. "What's wrong? " Viktor whispers, pulling his lover into an embrace. "I- I just realized how childish I been, if I was thinking just a little then I wouldn't have had to speak to-" Yuuri pauses, thinking things over in his head once more. What was this? Do couples ... always fight over stupid stuff? Did he want to tell Viktor what happened at the bar while he was gone? It wouldn't hopefully effect their relationship, and what's the worst is a, presumably 18-19-year-old kid, could do that to a full out athlete like himself? Was he a still a child?

Viktor smiles admirably at Yuuri's readable expression as he sought for a response, "Does it have to do with the kid I saw you talking to at the bar the other day?" He questions, watching his husband go wide-eyed. "H-how'd you- Ah ... you saw that huh? ..." Yuuri asks tensely smiling back. "Yeah." Viktor retorts moving over to the couch then motioning Yuuri to sit next to him. "But it makes me wonder," he began trailing off into his own thoughts folding one leg over waiting for Yuuri to say something in-place of his absent thoughts.  
It should be fine telling him. I trust Viktor and if he doesn't notice there is something wrong with William then no one will. "He was Minami's-" A ring tolls through the room followed by loud knocking. "Well someone really wants to see one of us ... Nice timing." Viktor mutters, standing up from his spot on the couch. Yuuri let out a small sigh of relief. As much as he thought Viktor deserved to know what happened, he didn't know what his reaction would be. Thinking of his different possible reactions is what gave him the most anxiety.

Yuuri follows behind him. Maybe it was best after talking to Viktor to simply urge William out of his mind, what if he was simply joking with the other male and Yuuri was the one who exploded by telling him all that? What if William was at their door to apologize for ... Yuuri shakes his head as he begins finally forcing every thought about William out of his head like every creepy fan. But, standing in the doorway was a yellow and red-haired boy.

"Minam-"

"Yuuri!!" Minami shrieks pushing past Viktor and launching his arms around the confused male. Yuuri pats his head, falling onto the floor in confusion. Minami shivers in his arms, he was sobbing ... "Minami... What happened?" Yuuri asks as softly as he possibly could. "I-it was my new friend, William. After I left you two alone I got a call while I was walking to the apartment where my coach and I are staying! I have no idea how, but I got a call from his parents telling me that he hasn't come home for several days. I just met him, I never even got to know his parents! I told them what I could, I told them I seen him today and left him with another friend. They told me t-they'd call the police if I didn't have him on the phone in the next 5 hours." He spills everything instantly as if he'd even waiting to tell them both for ages. He can feel Minami finally recline in his arms, "But now you're here, and you know where he is, right? I'm sure you guys exchanged numbers or something. He's a great guy." Minami sniffles struggling to stand up again. But, Yuuri didn't move. He hadn't seen the younger male after they'd fallen out. He mentally screams at himself, this day couldn't get any worse. "Y - Yuuri? Why aren't you talking?" Minami's body tenses once again. "I'm sorry Minami.." Yuuri managed out. He then pondered whether he should tell Viktor and Minami about what happened again, but hearing a small sniffle, urges his mind to make a decision quicker, and he gives in.

"We had a.. 'falling out'." He quietly states, feeling the guilt of fighting with a younger boy wash over him. "He started saying some.. stuff, and he laughed at me. We didn't hit each other, but it was more or less like he was threatening me." The Japanese male then looks to the ground, unable to stare them in the eyes as he talked. "I was light-headed, kinda drunk, and tired, so I screamed at him and pushed him away.." Because I'm a coward. He stutters, still unable to look at them. For a few moments, the room was mute. Yuuri actually screamed at someone other than Viktor. Still, their faces were of shock, and he didn't know what to say to lessen the quiet tension in the room. "But..." Finally, Minami's broken the silence, "why would he ... what'd he even say to you?" Yuuri's face paints red. Now looking back at what he said, it wasn't all that bad, but he was slightly drunk, and the fight he had with Viktor didn't help his feelings and dealing with his drunkness at all.

Deciding there was no reason to stay on the floor feeling ashamed of what he'd done, Yuuri gets to his feet. "If they call the police," Yuuri says hesitantly, going over to close the door behind his husband. "they have the footage from the bar, the last place we'd all been since getting that call, right? Well, even if they wanted to arrest us, they'd have no evidence of it. I mean..." Yuuri motions for them to all follow him into the main room, everyone takes a seat waiting for him to continue. "He laughed at me and came onto me first ... I think. No one has any reason to suspect me if he ... "Yuuri pauses, stuck in place. He couldn't go on with-- "If he ends up dead?" Viktor suggests, completing the missing words of Yuuri's sentence, finally saying something since Minami ran by him in the doorway. "Y- yes, I mean, if something happens to him. This is the first time I've even ever talked to him at all, so.."

And he laughs in my face and trash talks my husband, then I find out he'd been missing for days? ..Is what he wanted to say, but had no trouble silently thinking it to himself. But suddenly a question he had trouble figuring out himself pops into his head. "Minami, I'm sorry for what happened. I just met him today and I swear I have no idea what happened to him, or how his parents even got your number in the first place, but do you know how old William is?" Yuuri asks, turning his head to Minami. "He told me he was 18, like me, but his parents told me he was 22..." Yuuri's thoughts falter as he heard what William had told Minami. "I'm not actually sure right now. He looked like he was my age, but don't judge a book by its cover I guess ..."

"Why would he lie about his age when 18 isn't too much older from being 22, sure it's a small gap, but still.... and living with his parents at 22? Or is he like me, and they own some hotel he stays at.." Yuuri murmurs to practically no one. "So you lied to me about knowing what happened at the bar then?" Viktor finally speaks up again. Yuuri felt his head shaking fiercely as he searches for an explanation. He simply chucks at the frightened studdering Japanese male and gave a reassuring smile. "It's fine Yuuri, but we should talk about this later." For a second his nervousness subsides as he smiles back.

"Alright?" The platinum-haired male asked sternly staring at his husband with a soul-piercing glare. "Y- yeah!-" He repeated after, then being interrupted by a vibrate on the side of his waist. Soon realizing it was his phone, the male dug into his pockets to answer it.

"Hello?-"

"Yuuri." A heavy tone breathes out from the other end of the line. Instantly Yuuri's voice lulls. 

Settling a loose all the random questions he had in his mind with a simple, ''what?''

Viktor began to squirm uncomfortably in his seat as Minami sat quietly. He hears the man chuckle over the phone.

"Wow! How rude, I was just calling to say you never told me bye. Minami is with you right? Tell him I say hi!"

How did he know? Is he close to us right now? "Walking away and leaving you on the ground wasn't enough of a 'bye' for you? " Yuuri blurts.  
There was a pause on the other end followed by some giggling.  
"You're hilarious!" He chuckles out, "hey how is Minami holding up? Did he get that call from my parents yet?" Yuuri stays silent. Trying to stay calm while listening to such an arrogant voice was much more troublesome than it may seem.

"Yep! I knew about it. Sure they care about me, but they wouldn't let me visit you because they thought I wouldn't have the money. Your 5-second pause of silence is enough to tell me stories about how your day went. You know, it's actually pretty fun talking to you? I can read you like a book. Honestly, I hope you don't break as fast as I think you will. I have high hopes, I'll bet it all on your sanity!" He musses through the phone.  
"What do you want?" Yuuri answers back bluntly, looking around to see Viktor's now worried expression. Yuuri frowns at how uncomfortable and concerned he resembled, he put the phone on speaker for them to hear.  
"Geez, you're so rude Yuuri, but since you asked.." He trails off, his words sounding much louder on speaker. "W- william? ..." Minami murmurs noiselessly. "I want, you..." He concludes.

"You can't have him." Yuuri wipes his head up to his husband who had blurted out a response for him. The room was full of a disinviting suspense once more as they all wait for what would be said on the other line.

"Ah..." he said wistfully, "I see ... you put me on speaker for your husband, huh?" He says nearly inaudibly. Is he mad?

"Damn it Yuuri!" William yells,"Fine you want all want to know what's on my mind huh? Well, I'd like to see Viktor try me, taking Yuuri away and thinking he can keep him to himself. Taking the world away was enough, I didn't mind walking out of my room every day seeing his shitty fucking face, I could overlook it, but stealing Yuuri?! 

"It is unacceptable.

I'm going to have him and you're going to cry and sulk around your fucking apartment wondering why you couldn't have him to yourself- haha like you haven't taken enough from the world. Are you bored, Viktor? Did you just want more love? Stealing Russian, France, America, Japan-- more so ... the world!! And now ... Yuuri? You're far too arrogant to tell me what I myself can't have.

No one's realized the gravity of the situation until the phone finally hangs up.

This situation has gotten far worse. The chance that William was nothing more than your average creepy fan is long forgotten.


	2. Chapter 2

Yuuri shuffles around in his blankets miserably. It was far too cold for Viktor to be next to him right now, right? He sleepily moves his hands around towards the other side of the bed and as expected, the man wasn't even there.  _Why didn't he wake me? ..._

_Vitya ❤: Good morning love. Don't wait up tonight, Yakov is forcing me to take late night practice. Something about making up the time I spent on coaching you. I'll return home at 6 before having to leave again at 8 for more practice. Walk Makka for me pls. I love u ❤_

Yuuri sighs to himself, forcing a sleepy smile.  _The way this man texts is still kind of cute ... World champion my butt._

_You: I love you too! But please wake me before you leave from now on, I'm basically not going to be able to see you all day!_

_Vitya ❤: ah, I'm sorry. I thought u could use the extra sleep and I didn't know Yakov would hold me for the day._

_You: Thanks, but id rather see u out the door instead of being left in bed alone_

_Vitya ❤: I'm so sorry!!! we can cuddle when I get home??_

_Vitya ❤: I'll talk to you later during my break, bye_

_You: Bye!_

It was weird, but they always tend to say bye to each other after each text, even if it was something trivial. A small conversation then, 'bye.' Of course, not everyone does that, and nor did Yuuri decide it was right to do with other people since he only had a habit of saying bye to Viktor. Phichit was no exception. 

\--

Slipping on his clothes and grabbing his phone, he walks out the door with Makkachin's leash between his fingers.  
  


Yuuri looks around. Damn, forgot the glasses. He tended to use even for simple things like walking Makka. He was far too popular nowadays to be walking out in broad daylight with a dog even. "Hey! ... Y- You're Yuuri Katsuki, right?" He hears an awed voice from behind him. 

Yuuri forces himself to grin, beginning to approach the fan. Actually, he looked around Viktor's age, but that was normal for people who were fans of this type of sport. "Yes, I am. What would you like?" He tries to ask as casually as possible. A man, a little taller than Yuuri himself. Blue fluffy hair and midnight eyes stare at him. Would it be wrong to call him cute? He rummages through his pockets nervously, "I- I ... um well, an autograph ... plea--" A deck of photos falls out of his pocket, scattering across the ground. 

"I- I'm so sorry.." He utters shamefully.   
"It's not a problem! I used to keep pictures of my idols as well." Yuuri's eyes surreptitiously study the man gathering the photos. Taking a closer look at the photos ... all of them seemed to be of him. It was a first he'd ever seen someone like him in real life. Most fans that he found creepy would be online or some by which Phichit has told him of.   
"Yeah... But I'm 6 years older than y- I.." The man pauses midspeech realizing how creepy he must've sounded. Photos now this?  _What person in their right mind makes two mistakes like that in a day?!_  
"Like I said..." He opens a capped marker with ease. (He always keeps on him thanks to Phichit), "its no problem at all."

With a satisfied look on his face thinking of his months of practiced cursive writing, Yuuri returns the photo to the man.    
"T- thank you so so much.."   
"No, thank you!" Yuuri retorted kindly.

\--  
  


"Your jumps since last season have gotten a bit better.." The blond speaks, and for a second Viktor pondered on whether he had heard that correctly.   
"Yurio? Are you okay?" Then the moment was gone once again.   
"My name isn't- ugh...! Forget it." The blond snarls angrily, then skating away on the ice. Did Yuri just compliment his skating? Viktor asks himself as he unlocks his phone.

He was on break and wanted to talk to Yuuri, but upon several texts, he hadn't responded.

2:54pm  
_You: Yuuri! I have a 15-minute break soon, wanna talk love?  
_

_3:20pm_  
_You: um? Are u there?  
_

_3:23pm_  
_You: I guess I'll talk to you when I get home then?  
_

Now Viktor only had 2 minutes left for break. Seeing that Yuuri probably wasn't going to reply before then, he turned off his phone and threw it back in his bag before he heard a buzz, picking it up once again to see ...

_My piglet 😍(AN//I don't like emojis, but I figured Viktor wld use em ... "piglet" so cringe.): Sorry Viktor, I'm feeling kind of sick today.  
_

Holding a puzzled face, Viktor contemplates how to reply. Why was he sick all of a sudden?

_You: I'll make you some soup when I get home! I really have to go to practice, but I hope you feel better. I love you._

_My piglet 😍: Okay._

_My piglet 😍: See you later._

_Weird_... Viktor skates slowly back into the middle of the ring. This wouldn't be normal for anyone else but them. He didn't reply correctly to Viktor's "I love you," nor did he say bye? It was a simple habit, but he instantly noticed it. Maybe that's just how badly he ended up getting.

\--

He slams the door quickly. Pressing his chest against the smooth surface, he can hear his heartbeat clearly pounding in his ears. 

 _This has never happened before this has never happened before._  What was he supposed to do?!

Gently loosening his grip on the handle, he sprints over and back for his phone. Scrolling through the contacts like his life depended on it for the word "V." Telling himself empty promises if he got out of this,  _you'll definitely improve security when this is over, you'll definitely let Viktor know when this is all over, you'll definitely put him on speed dial when this has passed._

His entire planned is ruined as a loud bang sounds through the room and the only thing Yuuri feels his the door colliding with his face, it's knob colliding with his side causing his phone to shatter, sliding helplessly across the ground. Yuuri relishes in pain. Falling to the floor, hearing footsteps and low barking and crying in a distant background. 

"Yuuri." Came a muffled disoriented voice. "Don't move." Came it again as he's now frozen on his spot on the ground. A small click and he's met with two eyes and a gun. "You're going to follow me now, okay?" Yuuri sits still. 

_**A coward. That's what you are. How do you deal with this? Are you going to fight him? Even if it may cost you your life?** _

"People may think irrationally when it comes to fear, and you may not see it now while you're inside your cozy little apartment waiting for the love of your life to return. But Viktor isn't here the police aren't here, and you're not safe now. I really don't want to hurt you, darling." 

_**No. You aren't ... that's just not what someone like yourself is capable of. Refuse it?** _

_Refuse it._ Yuuri says to himself.

But he stood anyway.   
  
\--

Yuuri's heart races as the car's engine roars. The man plops Yuuri's cell phone on top of the dashboard, "We're going to have so much fun ..." He smiles wholeheartedly. 

.

Minutes had passed by. The night just wouldn't stop. As they passed streets and city lights, a populate area came into view and they happened to be at a stop light. As Yuuri's hands shook, he slowly begins reaching for the taxi's car door. Now or nothing, he told himself feeling close to passing out because of his own anxieties. 

Snapping the car lock open with a pop, Yuuri pulls the handle. 

Air? A cool breeze? Nothing. 

It doesn't work. 

He does it again and again, but the door wouldn't budge. Lungs lacking air, mind full of desperateness, Yuuri slams his entire weight onto the door. Again and again. The car shakes as he tries uncaring if his arm would later be bruised by his actions. 

The light turns green once more. 

"No need to waste your energy just yet darling."

_**A coward. That's what you are. How do you deal with this? Are you going to fight him? Even if it may cost you your life?** _

\--

_"--Up!"_

"Vikt?-" Yuuri's vision clears. He's then met with the same pair of eyes ... from that time. It all comes back again. Yuuri's lungs fill with dread as he looks around at the unfamiliar environment. Fear panic, they begin eating him alive.

Constant footsteps. It was then he realized he was over someone's shoulder. His arms and legs were tied as they walked through the neighborhood. Wouldn't someone see them like this?  
  
As they stop, he hears the rustle of keys. A door is kicked open, suddenly his body is slammed onto the ground. Was it out of amusement? Was kidnapping your idol fun?!  
  
The man grabs a fistful of black hair, as to cock him up using it. "There ya go. Welp ... it's not much, but I hope you enjoy your new home." Yuuri looks around carefully as the man takes off his previous rope, using police cuffs on his arms. It was an abandoned house. 

Strange ... someone might've lived here, it looked as though an old couple had in fact been here before them. With everything being in sigh aside from the room upstairs. The wooden floor seemed to be worn, asking for someone to get a splinter. Was the entire town this way? 

  
\--

Placing him inside of a room, the blue-haired man says something in Korean before attaching Yuuri to a bed. //  _" 당신은 나의 것이에요 . . ."_

Giving the boy once final stare, he leans down. Kissing his forehead before simply laying on him. Was that it? Yuuri pleads to god that this was all that was happening. He didn't want them to go any further, he was scared enough. Whilst listening to Yuuri's heavy breathing, a slow hand makes its way under Yuuri's shirt. He squirms around awkwardly, mentally begging for the hand to stop moving. As the hand began to stop moving, Yuuri stopped squirming.

"Be good, alright?" He states calmly, not bothering to look up. 

_Am I going to die?_

The hand that had been gone was now traveling its way up to Yuuri's belt, gripping and pulling down the only dignity he had left. 

_Only Viktor should be able to do this ..._

His pants slide far down his legs. 

What  **is** this?!

He felt like a kid again, far worse than being lost in a grocery store, far lost than being yelled at by mom or dad. He felt helpless as if he had to beg or be forgiven. But, no one would help you if they didn't know. No one will forgive you if you don't speak. 

  
"ah..s- stop," Yuuri groans in discomfort as a hand caresses the lump in his boxers.   
  
"Shhh..."   
  
_"please...."_  
  
"I said shut up!"   
  
Yuuri felt even more exposed, now his shirt was off on the floor with some guy was on top of him. Reaching under his boxers, Yuuri squirmed and tugged on every limb, hoping it would snap free. 

_Nonononononononnono_

Send into spiraling pain, Yuuri cries and cries. 

_Disgusting. I don't want it-- **A coward. That's what you are. How do you deal with this? Are you going to fight him? Even if it may cost you your life?**_ _**No. You aren't ... that's just not what someone like yourself is capable of. Refuse it?** _

_I can't anymore! Help me because I can hear you. It hurts._ "Ow ..." Yuuri chokes out as he's sent into more pain. 

"I love you," The man whispers as tears begin forming in Yuuri's eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

Yuuri feels his body shiver. Yes, he was cold, disgusted, everything was aching. From the cuffs and rope rubbing against his cut skin to his entire body feeling like I'd been left in a freezer. Cold and revolting.

"Are you cold?"

But, Yuuri doesn't reply. Unconsciously giving his left foot another tug as if to escape. The man blue-haired man tilts his head in curiosity. "Of course, I'm pretty sure you are ... Well, I'll take care of that!-- Oh! Wait. My name. It's Yu-Jin in case you wanted to know!" Running out of the room, he comes back within seconds with a giant cover and a key. Draping it over what he can, Yuuri's arms and feet both poke out. "Whoops, sorry but I gotta go ... and I need this." Above his head, Yuuri hears rustling until his hands fall onto the bed.

Can I leave? Instantly, Yuuri puts everything he had into sitting up, ignoring the aching pain in his back. Pushing himself up, despite the wincing when his wounds rub against the matrice. "Yuuri ? ... Y- you can't leave ..."

Reaching out for the rope on his legs, Yuuri reflexively throws the blanket he received at Yu-Jin. "Ahk ... W-Wait!!" The blanket sticks onto his face. Caught in a daze, the man steps on it and falls to the ground. "Yuur-- Ow!!"

Successfully, Yuuri finished untying his legs finally seeing the damaged he done to his bloody ankles after trying to escape multiple times. Slowly, painfully slowly, the Japanese male placed both feet on the floor, noticing how he still had his socks on, he glanced around the tiresome room. That's when he saw it. Quickly limping over to the black TV stand on the other side of the room, Yuuri swiped on the device uncaring about the obvious few cracks that were now visible. His throat became tight and his stomach twisted in even more disgust if that was even possible now.

 _2:54pm_    
 _Vitya ❤: Yuuri! I have a 15-minute break soon, wanna talk love?_

_3:20pm_   
_Vitya ❤: um? Are u there?_

_3:23pm_   
_Vitya ❤: I guess I'll talk to you when I get home then?_

_3:24pm_   
_You: Sorry Viktor, I'm feeling kind of sick today._

_3:24pm_   
_Vitya ❤: I'll make you some soup when I get home! I really have to go practice, but I hope you feel better. I love you._

_3:24pm_   
_You: Okay._

_You: See you later._

  
_4:47pm_   
_Vitya ❤: Hey, I couldn't actually get you off my mind today. Are you around? Yakov gave me 5 min to talk to you._

_4:48pm_   
_Vitya ❤: I only have about 5 minutes again, please respond if you can._

_4:48pm_   
_Vitya ❤: Yuuri, are you ignoring me?_

_4:52pm_   
_Vitya ❤: Love, please respond, did something happen? I get you're sick, but I doubt you're sleeping at this time ..._

_4:53pm_   
_Vitya ❤: I'm getting screamed at by Yakov, I guess I'll talk to you when I get home before leaving for more practice._

Yuuri's face pales.

He replied to my text for me. How did he even know my password?! Viktor must be worried ...

"I said ...!"

_I should've run._

**You would've been caught.**

Once again, Yuuri was pinned down.

\--

Had he done something wrong? To most people, not responding to a text or not saying those few simple words back meant nothing to them, but for Viktor? For Viktor, talking to his husband and seeing he hadn't responded in such a long time was worrying. And, although they did have a recent fight, normally their fights never meant much of anything-- especially after they'd been solved. Even when things got heated on the ice after a long day of coaching, Yuuri seemed, for the most part, unphased by it afterward. He'd still reply to a text and return the I love you's Viktor seemed to  _always_ say.

Viktor was currently pulling off his skates, after such a long day he definitely needed rest, but now? Now he needed to get home and talk to the guy clearly ignoring him. "You know," A voice came from behind him, "I take back what I said."   
Oh, it was just Yurio.

"About what?"

"Your skating earlier. It was perfect, but after the first break, you almost flopped all your jumps, which you rarely ever do ... You're lucky you didn't actually fall of Yakov would've screamed at you and blamed it on coaching Yuuri." The younger skater lectured, pulling up a loosely hanging backpack strap.

"Sorry, I'll try harder next time." Viktor retorts, only focusing on stuffing his skates back into his bag. Noticing this, Yuri's stare hardened as he swiftly turned on the balls of his hills towards the exit. "Tsk, whatever old man, not like I cared anyway."

Was he just too clingy? Was there really nothing off about the text?

\--

Hearing the front door slam was his motivation.   
He wasn't going to sit around waiting for the same man to return just so he could use him again-- although his wrist, ankles, and back strongly disagreed with the plan. When Jin came back into the room he tied Yuuri down to the bed using rope instead of the cuffs, by which he claimed to need before leaving. That was his mistake, they were slightly loose, and with enough strength, Yuuri could possibly untie them.

Reaching his head up to meet a loose rope hanging on the bed, his back and waist screamed at him, stinging him in pain as he strained all his energy. Grabbing the rope between his teeth, he tugged as hard as he could, allowing one of his hands to fall limp on the bed, once again coming into contact with the dirty matrice. Immediate this time, he stood, ignoring every tension in his body, frantically glancing around the room for his clothing, but they were nowhere- well nowhere he could see anyway. Tracing the room, his eyes landed on a closet. Certainly, he wouldn't be able to go outside naked, regardless if he would be able to escape, he'd probably be arrested after being completely humiliated. The doors flew open revealing a small wardrobe, but he wasn't complaining. Running his fingers through the worn clothing he spotted- his shirt? Along with the rest of what he was originally wearing before he was...   
No longer simply thinking about the choices he were to make at that moment, the 23-year-old man slipped into all his clothing trying best to cover up the bruises and hickeys that had surfaced on his skin.

Quickly, he hurried to the bedroom door- right after he grabbed his phone from under the bed.

Sprinting, loving the feeling of freedom; he opened the front door making sure Jin was nowhere in sight.

The fresh air hit all at once and so did a couple of supplementary tears.  
It had only been a few hours, but it felt like days- days being with Yu-Jin. It was then he noticed what kind of neighborhood he was really in. Most of the houses had been abandoned and replaced by stray animals, and if there was someone living in one of the homes they probably didn't have a phone. So even if they heard Yuuri's cries for help; they most likely didn't even have any access to tell anyone about it anyway. His body went into auto piolet as he ran as far away from the  _abandoned city_  as he could.

After a few miles, Yuuri's legs gave in causing a new kind of hurt to add to the collection of pain below his waist. His palms were sweaty  _ **[A\N KNEES WEAK ARMS ARE HEAVY- Moms... haha.**_ ** _I'm sorry_** _I_ ** _had to.]_**  
and his back was literally killing him as he slowly ascends back up to his feet. After a few seconds of glaring at the new scraps that formed on his knees after scraping them on the pavement, the Japanese male took out his phone. "Please don't be dead.." He begs himself. He gasped in relief to see the phone still had 30% left.

_You: Viktor!_

His fingers paused on the keyboard thinking about all the possible things he could say. He needed help, he wanted help.  
 _'Viktor can you pick me up?'_  
 _'That wasn't actually me replying earlier today.'_  
 _'Viktor I was...'_  
Thinking out a series of words he would like to say, Yuuri decided it would be better to just call him-

_Vitya ❤: What._

_Vitya ❤: Are you there all of a sudden? Where were you?_

His breathing sped.   
 _'What?'_  I-   
But as Yuuri scrolled up seeing all the missed text he had received, even a few missed calls his voice caught in his throat.

He was definitely upset, and if I told him about to the what happened he'd only think...

A few tears slid down his cheek thinking of what his husband would see him as after he'd been used like this.

 _You: Never mind, sorry_.

_You: Im really sorry for not replying earlier_ _. Don't worry about me_

He clicks the small button on the phone allowing it to finally flash off.

_**Coward--** _

"Are you coming, or what?"   
Yuuri tilts his head upward. A grumpy old bus driver wore a confused look almost leveling Yuuri's puzzled gaze. The cool air of the bus hits him as he begins looking around still in an uneasy daze.   
"Ahem."   
"A-ah yes... Erm.. How much do I?..." The man sighs readjusting his hands on the steering wheel. The doors closed and the floor buzzed under his feet. "Don't worry about it." He said smoothly waving him away.  
"Yeah but- "   
"You're that figure skater. My daughter always used to watch on Television." He spoke while keeping his eyes on the road.   
"I- "   
"I said it's- "   
Yuuri groaned sleepily. "I mean, does this go to St. Petersburg?"   
"No." He replied and Yuuri frowned. "It stops near there though, you can walk the rest of the way."   
He sighs in relief and to his surprise, the bus driver smiled, still staring ahead, but smiling? "Long day?" The man asks. But, oh he had no idea. "Yeah.."   
"She was a really big fan." The bus slows a bit as he reached into his pocket grabbing out a photo, but not one of himself like Jin, one of what Yuuri presumed, to be his daughter. Instantly understanding the context of the situation, he took the photo without question placing his signature at the bottom. Taking a look at it further, still realizing the complete respect he still held for all- most his fans, whether they were as old as Jin or as young as the girl in the photo.   
  
  
  


_Red_   
_Green_   
_Orange_   
_Blue_

_The colours sparkled imprinting the walls that were once tinged in the dirt with a masterful splash of hope._

_Hope._

_The word the man standing in the doorframe of the room still couldn't grasp._

_Her eyes focused on the water streaming down the window pane._

_Sumptuous._

_The word for his last piece of hope that be his daughter. Snagging a picture for the simple memory, he couldn't help the smile placed on his lips._

_"I knew you were watching me." Her lips curled into the adorable smile, the same one her mother used to share on days same as this one._

_"Sorry," he snickers, walking over to where his daughter sat._

_"Don't be weird." She laughed as well, pulling her thin figure skating blanket I bought her for her 7th birthday. She grew up so fast_ - _too fast. Back when he wasn't willing to accept the fact that their life would probably get worse as it goes on. Knowing how she's only 10 with this kind of condition almost kills him. It's not fair but like he said, "life gets worse as it goes on..."_

And that it had.

_She kept smiling but nodded slightly as a tear fell down the other side of her cheek, the one not facing her father._

_"Stop being weird," She sniffles._

  
✗  **✗** ✗

_kiki.ni__

**BusYuuri.png**

3,643 likes  
 _kiki.ni__  OMG I SAW YUURI KATSUKI ON THE BUS!!

_lila23 @lila23 · 10m_

Youre so lucky! Did you say hi?

_saynoboo @saynoboo. · 4m_

wheres his husband at though? I rarely see him and Viktor apart.

_do-you-even-lift-bro @douevenliftbroo · 2m_

Why are his jeans so messed up? Honestly he looks like he just got back from world war Vll-iktor. Look at those bags!

_yuurikatsuki_isbea @yuuriisbeabro · 10m_

Oh my freaking god! Okay so Viktor is missing, his jeans half rips in them- there are cuts in replace...CUTS meaning he fell, he has large bags under his eyes, and he looks over-all dazed.

_Melani3.123 @melmel45 · 10m_

you guys are being overdramatic, that could mean literally anything. stop trying to start unnecessary drama, please.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget about the fans that are literally everywhere!


	4. Chapter 4

_"Long day?"_

The taxi driver asked, not taking his eyes off the road. Boy, he had no idea. "Yeah..." Viktor retorted, unwilling on giving him all the details.   
"You're Viktor Nikiforov, right? My wife and I love your skating."   
You could basically hear the smile in his voice as he spoke.   
"Thank you," Sometimes he himself even forgets how he has so many fans- fans that could be literally anywhere. Not that its a bad thing but It's scary, yet at the same time, comforting. "Do you and your wife watch skating all the time?" He questioned while staring outside at the objects that passed him in a blurred motion. "Well, my wife does more than she should really, I just watch it on my downtime."

The car came to a stop in front of his familiar building. "Welp here you are." Viktor beamed as he remembered he hadn't seen Yuuri all day. He was likely to be sleeping now because he was supposedly sick, but Viktor couldn't help the excitement he began to feel. "Yep! And sorry I can't give you a tip, I don't keep much money on me after practice."   
The man chuckled shaking his head, then faced him. "Ah, don't worry about it. Just take my card. I also work with the police force and would be ecstatic if you were to call me instead of my other coworkers. Unlike them, I'm sure I'll get the job done quicker. Especially when it comes to some of the deadliest most common things nowadays; such as murder...." his face grew dark for a second and Viktor couldn't tell if he was smiling or utterly pissed off. "...and kidnap." His face grew again as he finally turned around in his seat to face the platinum-haired man. His turquoise hair and black midnight eyes gleamed with joy and certainty. "Here!" He said with a smile handing Viktor his card. "Have a nice day!"

He glanced at the card a couple times before sliding it into his pocket. It was nothing special in his opinion, and he doubts he'd ever need to even call this guy. The card only stated a few Russian words, his name, and number. Viktor at least took the audacity in learning his name in case they were to inevitably meet again.

 _Yu-Jin Cho._ Was that Korean?   
  


He slowly began peeling off his pants. They felt dirty like someone had rolled in the mud a thousand times with them before he was forced to put them on.

The water hadn't even been warm yet before he immediately stepped in, letting the first freezing water poor onto him followed by scorching hot water and steam.

And as the water fell and burned his fragile skin, he couldn't help but let out a bitter chuckle. How ironic and dramatic he felt he was being.  _Wasn't this what girls do after being raped? I'm a grown 23-year-old man, I shouldn't need to burn myself to feel better. He isn't here anymore..._ The Japanese male began to assure himself.

Sure was used and if he were to say he wasn't completely disgusted in himself and his body, Yuuri would surely be lying.

His eyes traveled downward, staring at his beaten body. Hickeys, bruises, and the marks on his ankles stared right back, laughing at him. Yuuri's hurts blurred and finally, his knees gave as he hit the tub floor with a thud. He wasn't dying, he just didn't feel like standing is all. Didn't feel like standing in a shower?  _I'm so dramatic._ He thought.

_Thud_

What was...

_Bark_

"Makkachin?" Viktor shouts after hearing the distressed bark of his companion. "Yuuri?! Are you here?" Placing a hand on the storage closest, he pulled it open revealing his lost pet. The brown furred poodle huffed before jumping onto his master. "Okay Makka, down boy. Where's Yuuri?" The poodle licked the Russians' face, thus running away from the closest to their bedroom. The closer he got, the better he understood where Yuuri was supposed to be, but Viktor couldn't seem to figure out why he could possibly be taking a shower now.  _He's sick._ Viktor silently reminded himself as his shoes echoed against the wooden floor.

Finally, Viktor places a slow hand on the bedroom door "Yuuri--" but the room door wouldn't budge and he became wearier. His eyes wandered to his pet then back to the locked door, the only thing holding him back from peeking on his husband in the shower!

The sound of water came to a stop and Viktor rest his head on the door only to hear faint shuffling. After a few minutes, the door clicked open, and something other than him ran into the room. From the other side, there was a faint yelp and another thud like the one from earlier. As Makkachin jumped onto his love as if he hadn't even seen him for the whole day. But surely Yuuri had been here all day. He was sick- the missed text and phone calls would prove that theory true, yet he didn't look sick. He looked tired and a bit startled, maybe even scared.   
"Yuuri?..." The smaller male looked up, meeting his husband's gaze with hazel brown eyes. "Y- yes Viktor?" The Russian paused, taking in the sight of this person. In a sense, he looked different. Maybe it was because he hadn't talked to him for most of the day, maybe it was because he just got out the shower, maybe it was the fact he just flat out missed his beloved cute eyes, face, and hair, or maybe...  
"You look like you're about to cry..." he blurted.

There was a long pause in the room. Viktor was about to speak again but was interrupted, "Ah, I'm still feeling kind of sick. And like I said earlier, I'm sorry for not replying to any of your text earlier. I just..." Yuuri chocked out a sob. "I, just... Uhm." For a second Viktor couldn't move, he rarely sees Yuuri cry- not since the time at The  
Cup of China and this sounds much worse. Viktor wanted to speak, wanted to move, and that, he was about to do. "Yu--" The man laughed and hid his face in all the layers he was wearing, but that also surfaced another question in Viktor's head. Why was he wearing so much? Did he take Makkachan out for another walk recently?  
"I really don't get why I'm like this, it was probably something I took. I don't feel very well like I said, s- so can we just sleep?" Viktor watched him force the crying to subside and forces a smile. He didn't like this but decided not to press it.   
Viktor furrowed his eyebrows before raising one. "Like that?" Yuuri tilts his head to the left. "With all the layer you have on? You'd likely get hot." He stated, "Well...." There was a slight pause before Yuuri completed his statement, "I'm still not very used to the Russian weather. It's kind of cold for me, plus I'm sick so I want to keep it on if that's okay... I mean if you want to cuddle or something it might be uncomfortable though." The Japanese male said- not once looking at the Russian. Viktor chuckled as he watched his husband yet to move off the floor. "It's fine, but don't stay sick for too long, we have a competition in a few weeks. If I'm going to be your competitor and lover than you to have to stay fit in order to surpass me- well that is if you can." Yuuri's head shot up in a mad pouted frenzy, "you'll have to try and surpass  _me!_  And I'll be the one on the special spot this time, Vitya!" He shouted playfully and winked. Viktor simply laughed at that and smiled back, by which turned into a mischievous smirk. "Yuuurii~" He coed as Yuuri now got to his feet. "You know, you'll always have a special spot in me... " He said smoothly slowly stepping closer to his husband, the large amounts of clothing he had on, now seeming to be aggravating. "Is it on your bald spot?" Yuuri asked with no emotion, and Viktor stopped dead in his tracks.  
To say he wasn't hurt was an  _understatement_.   
  
  
  


After that, they didn't speak and Viktor poutily passed Yuuri and threw his clothing on the floor before slipping into bed. Yuuri slowly joined him and Viktor huffed before sliding further away.   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


"Yuuri?   
  
  
  


Why was Makkachin in the closet?"


	5. Chapter 5

The day had passed, a damn week had passed. So why can't he seem to get that one moment out of his head? It wasn't special, hell he probably deserved what that guy...

Sometimes it's hard to remember how hurting yourself hurts others too, however, he felt that he needed a physical punishment for his mental thoughts. "So stupid!..." He scolded himself running a knife through his skin a couple times. Now wasn't this also ironic, now he had cut himself because he can't express how he feels any other way? Just like the stupid shower incident with himself, he was acting dramatic...  but... although Yuuri knew this, why would anyone really care if he messed himself up? Viktor might, but for a second Yuuri couldn't see why. Why Viktor had done everything he had, then it clicked.

_It still makes no sense, but he loves me._

_Just a few, then I won't do it again or Viktor will definitely notice._  He thought blatantly.

It's not that he wanted to tear through his skin. He thought he needed to be punished for thinking selfishly, for being used so easily and actually admiring the eyes of whom used him. His eyes were pretty, not as pretty as Viktor's, but very pretty. And after staring at posters of this man, he knew Viktor was far more beautiful than Jin.

"Oi Katsudon! Hurry up, we're going to be yelled at. Your fucking boyfriend and Yakov together is the ugliest combination." He growled while repeatedly slamming his foot on the changing booth door. Yuuri sighed as he slid his sleeve down from off his shoulder and put the pocket knife (he now keeps)  back into his pocket.

Gliding onto the ice- his knees felt weak and his ankles still ached. To say he would be able to land his jumps would be the epitome of saying Yurio wouldn't swear for once. This year though, he also began getting closer to his blond friend. And if not, he can definitely read his emotions better and so can Yurio.

His pelvis became even more irritated than it already was and everything hurt, but with the GPF coming up and his time running short- he had to ignore it, had to remind himself not only his reputation was on the line but so was Viktor's. It seems that now is the time when he had to constantly remind himself that. After doing spin after spin and jump after jump, the pain only grew and his body couldn't take it, but that wasn't the problem in his case-  _he_  needed to take it. Yuuri grew tired of his body's lack of effort, unlike his mind. In his mind he was able to push aside all the pain and focus on one thing, one thing that can take him through anything, because  _Viktor is the magic in my life and Viktor makes anything possible._  Hell, Yuuri wouldn't be surprised if he were to see him make pigs fly tomorrow, he already made Yuuri soar higher than he'd ever be able to get by himself ...

Taking his place on the ice, he got ready for a quad- while practicing, he to do at least  _one_  by the end of the day, but Yuuri always liked to do way more than that and so did everyone else. Today though, he wasn't even sure if he would be able to do any, the way his practice had been going so far proved that.

 _Just think of Viktor, think of his skating, his love for skating._  
As much as he tried to think of Viktor, he couldn't. And if Yuuri did think of him, it was just about how upset he would be if he found out what happened. How used and disgusting he  _really_ was.

The ice slowly became a black hole in his mind and as he pushed himself to start the quad, the blades felt like a lawn mower unmercifully slicing his own skin. He couldn't dance- shit he couldn't even  _breathe_.   
  
He jumped into the air doing a spin- he wasn't aware of how many rotations.

The air and his tears were basically knocked completely out of him as he fell into the same black hole eating at his mind. He could feel his wet cheeks while he lay on the ice. Everything hurt a thousand times more, but that's not why he was crying. That's not why his heart is hurting.

"P- pig? What happened?" Yurio asked trying his best not to sound as concerned as he really was, but it's not like Yuuri could hear him. He felt trapped felt ... like he'd never enjoy the ice again. The cold stiff black void he was laying on made his back feel numb, and Yurio was only here to pity him because he just couldn't do it. Couldn't do it, he never could, never was able to. Not until Viktor, and now his heart aches the same way it used to before he had Viktor. 

_**Failure.** _

Despite all the aches and pains, he slowly lifts himself until he was completely sitting up.   
"I couldn't do it... " He whispered pitifully as more fresh tears blindly ran down his face. Yurio secretly became more concerned for his semi-friend.  
"What are you ..." The Russian, Yuri, began to question but was immediately cut off. "I couldn't do it, I couldn't do it, I couldn't do it..." He bellowed like a devastated child lost in his head.   
  
  
\--

Thinking back on last night, he smiled.  _Is it on your bald spot?_

Despite how much that hurt at first,  it was hilarious and Viktor knew it. Of course, he was never truly upset last night, but he was pouty and even left Yuuri alone on the bed trying to sleep as far to the edge as possible. As much as he tried to do that, however, they woke up in each other's arms, impossibly close.

After Yuuri moved in, everything sort of fell into place. No more sleeping alone, no more coming home to only Makkachin- and if he did then Yuuri would be home soon after. Sometimes he'd coach Yuuri, and sometimes Yuuri would practice with the other Yuri while he with Yakov, and sometimes they'd all practice together if Yakov wanted to focus on Georgi or Mila, but regardless if they didn't get to see each other every second of the day; they were happy, and Viktor will never regret putting his career on hold to coach his now former husband.   
Though, something seemed off, strangely off with Yuuri lately. He wore too many layers to bed, didn't speak as often today, and now that he was thinking of it, Yuuri didn't even eat breakfast this morning. Viktor could clearly tell he was hiding something, maybe he was still sick. That would explain the layers and not having an appetite,  _but he could tell me if he was sick right?_

"Good work today, Vitya." His coach praised as Viktor finished packing his skates. "You can thank Yuuri for that," He said cheerfully as his partner's name rolled off his tongue, "he's been fitting in with the Russian team so well. As soon as he moved in, it's funny how easily things came together, right Yakov?" He mused to himself remembering a conversation he and Yakov had about Yuuri not being able to fit in. Of course, Yakov's statement was easily proven wrong, but deep down he knows Yuuri is still getting used to things, like the fact he was so cold last night he wore a jacket to bed. Maybe it was because he was sick, but Viktor didn't think that was the case. Hasetsu, Yuuri's hometown, used to snow as well, but it could never compare with the heavily cold days of Russia.

Yakov huffed and frowned. "Right but-"   
 _"I couldn't do it I couldn't do it I couldn't do it_ " Repeated from across the rink where Yuris' were supposed to be practicing. Instantly that pulled a string in Viktor's mind and before he knew it, his skates were back on and he was next to Yuri asking him what happened. Before he could reach his husband though, he basically ran off the ice stumbling on the way out. "Yuuri!- Yurio what happened?" Viktors mind was in a frenzy as he saw his love run from him. "THAT'S NOT MY-" Yuri sighed and pinched his nose. "He just fell trying to do a quad and then he started mumbling shit and left before you got here. I didn't do anything but ask the pig if he was alright because the fall looked like it hurt." He said in a calmer manner.

Now that didn't make sense... Surely Yuuri wouldn't do all of that without reason. They were just talking about how well he was fitting in, and then he runs away from everything seconds later?

Yuri sighed again and his lips twitched into a smile, "Viktor, if you don't mind me asking..." He started and Viktor was wondering if he hit his head on the way here because of how quick his tone changed. "What, the, fuck, did you do to him?" Okay, now Viktor  _knew_ he was hearing things. "Since when did you start caring about him, huh?" He couldn't help but tease. Yurio didn't seem phased, however, and glared at the man instead ' _how can you joke right now delusional old man?'_ Thought the young blond.

"What was the quad he was trying to do?" Viktor decided to ask instead. "Well... I'm not too sure but it looked like just a quad sal. I don't know if he was going to do a combination or not." He responded.

Viktor was about to leave, Yuuri probably would have followed in the next 20-30 minutes or so. Could it have been the upcoming competitions making him anxious? But he always has to deal with that kind of thing, so why was if messing with him now? Was there a reason Yuuri was anxious  _this_ time before a competition? It could be possible his love began thinking about how Viktor would ever be able to pull off being his competitor and coaching him at the same time and that triggered his anxiety, but none of those make very much sense at the moment...

Heavy breathing coaxed the room and Viktor swiftly followed it. "Yuuri?" He began calling. He wasn't expecting an immediate response. "I'm here Viktor!" Yuuri came from around a corner holding his skating bag and now in normal clothes. So he changed eh?   
"Yuuri what was-"  
"Ah! Yeah that, I'm sorry it was just some anxiety that caught me off-guard. I'm okay now." He said grinning up at Viktor before averting his gaze to somewhere unknown.

Viktor was stuck, this was surely... fake, right? Normally Yuuri would say what the anxiety was, they were passed keeping things like that from each other. And as normal as it seems for the younger male to avert his gaze because he's known to be a shy person, lately he's been more open and the shyness he used to express with Viktor wasn't all too bad anymore. He simply shrugged it off as Yuuri being so embarrassed by his anxiety, it wasn't very uncommon.

He didn't want to shrug off Yuuri's problems.   
  


One rotation, two, thre-  
The jump failed due to a hard push, along with his legs as he crash-landed on the ice. That will definitely be another bruise in the morning. "What the hell Georgi?!" The blond screamed as the other man lay a few feet away from the skater. "I- 'm sorry. It's just... Ananya, she just got engag-"   
"I don't give a shit about your stalker one-sided relationship! Just watch where you're fucking going and leave me out of it." He scoffed as he began getting back up to his feet.  _Shit, this hurts more than I thought it would..._

"B-but she... Engaged. My love!" The man cried, leaving a few pitiful tears on the ice.   
"I'm so damn tired of people and their love lives! I mean did you even fucking see the damn pork cutlet bowl?"   
That drew Mila's attention as she now sprinted over as close as she could due to the wall barrier. "Ohh?~" She sang as she heard the new gossip given about the two. "This got nothing to do with you, hag!"   
"But Y-u-ri-~ it's only fair you give me at least a little intel on their relationship, I mean you're closer to them and I  _did_ get Yakov to stop screaming at you that one time!" She winked. Yuri did say he owed her, something he never does-never. But he was exhausted and didn't need Yakovs lecturing. "That doesn't make it okay to talk about them behind there-"   
"Oh? When did you start caring whether their feelings would be hurt or not? You're such a kitten." She teased and it instantly reminded him of Viktor's earlier teasing. He smirked,  "Whatever,  _fine!_  You wanna know so bad huh? Okay, Yuuri came into the rink extremely dazed. He keeps hiding his arms and I've caught him shedding tears a few times. But that's just when he entered, on the ice was worse. He barely got through practice and broke apart by the end of it. But of fucking course, his stupid idiot of a husband doesn't notice any of this because he's an ancient piece of shit with poor eyesight!" There was a pause as Yuri tried to catch his breath after screaming so quickly. His breathing paces easily because he screams at everyone and got used to it.

"I- I didn't notice either... " Mila broke the silence. "You know...  I was just trying to tease you I wasn't-" She paused again looking down as if she could see her own thoughts, but luckily for them they have Georgi. "What if-"   
"Georgi shut u-" Yurio inverted.  
"-He's having-"  
"Georg-"

_"An affair?"_

That makes no sense.  
 Why would the Katsudon have an affair after clearly  _disgustingly_ loving Viktor so much? He knows Georgi never knows what he's talking about- hell he's still in love with someone who's moved on and gotten engaged already. The idiot...  
But, what if he feels guilty for doing it? He has been distant from Viktor as he can tell from the way they first walked into the door. The most he saw them do today was hold hands as they entered the rink. Not much talking or interaction while Yuuri constantly pushed Viktor away to focus on himself. It could just be some kind of fight of theirs though, the affair theory is dumb and should have never been brought up.

The silence still rang in the air.   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_"Shut the fuck up, Georgi."_   
  
  
  
  
  



	6. Chapter 6

_You're so dumb... Stupid. Stupid. Stupid._  He scorned himself while resting his head on the table in front of him. He had every opportunity to do it, so why was it so difficult? Why did he fail to contain his only happiness?  
  
 "Long d-" Just stop. "Don't ask, people do that too much." He spat not even bothering to look up at the person who randomly sat next to him. "Ah, you're a little angry one I see?"

The blue strands fell from in front of his eyes landing on the side of his face as his midnight eyes fell upon his competitor. Taking one look at him his cheeks puffed out and he went into a fit of laughter. "What the hell? You're literally a 15-year-old kid! Take this as a favor from me; you're better off just going back into your old man's basement watching star track and reading Marvel comi-" He was cut off by a firm grip around his neck. Black eyes meeting with blue... Or were they red?

"I may look young but I assure you I don't lack much skill. Now, old man, are you going to listen or test me more?"  
"But... Y- y- just..." He choked out. The kid sighed letting his head slam on the table.

Taking in a few new breathes, he found his voice again, but it'll likely be the better choice to not test the kid. "Who are you?" He questioned, still holding his neck in pain. The child gave a wicked smile and sat back into the seat behind him, making himself comfortable. "Well! I'm William, and I've heard you lost your recent lover!" He drew giving off another unforgettable aura that he himself couldn't recognize. "Past... Lover?"   
"Yeah! Y'know... The girl who just happened to swing by your dead mother's basement?" His breathing froze, who exactly  _was_  this kid? "HOW'D YOU-" he lowered his voice remembering they were in public. "How'd you know that?"  
"Oh, well you see... I have my ways to find people I'm interested in. So may I do you the honor of finding you a new love?" He asked resting his boots on the table. "No one could ever replace Jeannie..." He replied lowly. "Hmmm? You can't be so sure now. How about I show you a few people you can choose from. I need all of them to find a 'lover' for reasons, but I need you to choose one." He pulled out a few photos from his pocket spreading them across the table. One after the other, they were all uninteresting, both boys and girls combined, but for the second time today his breathing stopped and his heart sped up. His tongue became tied as William covered the photo with a different person he was uninterested in. "W- wait! G- go back. That guy! He..." William looked up and shrugged as the boy's face came back into view.

Yes, he was perfect. So beautiful, yet simple. "Who's he?" William's yawned as he picked out the picture from all the others and pulled a few more out of his pocket. "This is Katsuki Yuuri. He was born in Hasetsu, Japan. He's now a famous Figure skater by age 24 however, he lives in St. Petersburg, Russia with his current lover Viktor Nikiforov. Also an extremely famous skater." His heart was practically beating out of his chest as the thought of Yuuri being with a different man arouses jealousy within him. "So... This Katsuki Yuuri, do you know any of his traits you can tell me of? Viktor as well."

The conversation on how amazing Yuuri actually turned out to actually be, went on and on. His accomplishments, goals, life. William even gave him a few articles and photos of the beautiful angel. He was sure to hold onto the photos forever until the question popped into his head.   
"How am I even going to do this, why are you here?" He asked and William sat up straight for once. "You see... Yu-Jin Cho, I've taken an interest in your abilities. I know you aren't utterly stupid like some of the other... Uhm, 'clients' I've reviewed. And to be frank, I need to eliminate this person, kidnapping him is the best way I see to it for what he's done. It may not seem like the best option in some eyes, I can easily order a hitman or grab a damn sniper and do it myself." He chuckled resting his shoes on the clean table. "But," He started looking dead serious once more. "I have a reason to break him. And now that I have the personnel to do so, I'll simply sit back and watch. I'll be the one to buy you the tickets and send you his exact location, and the reason why you're going to do all this shouldn't matter whatsoever. Got it Jin?" He asked firmly starting him dead in the eye. "Of course." He replied.

 

So this is Russia...  _No way better than Korea._  He thought as he stared out the taxi window. He did receive a few fake jobs from William.  _Why would a kid go through all the trouble of getting me a fake id?_

Jin couldn't understand, he was special in no way. Supposedly his hair was a slightly rare colour since brown, black and blond are the most known but had his so-called smarts really have made him interesting?

He forcibly shrugged it off as he arrived at his makeshift apartment. He could have almost any job in Japan and Russia and all he had to do was contact Will and ask for it?  _This kid must be a genius or something!_  It must cost so much, where would he get the money from? And speaking of money, how long would it be until he's cut off and needs to move back to Korea? Maybe he could make a living here with his new Yuuri.

Yuuri...

How would I get to him? He wouldn't let me just take him.

How do you become close to someone famous? How do you make yourself stand out from the rest?

Racking his head for answers all that night, he finally got it. He knew how to win his love.   
 _Now time to execute it._

 

The next few days living there were fine, his apartment was likable, the food was good considering the fact he used to go days without any, and every night he slept on a clean bed. But with that being said, he couldn't help the loneliness ringing in his mind every quiet second of the day.  
  
Yuuri would be his last chance of love.

Jin took out the photos of his future love which William had given him.

A tear ran down his cheek as he gawked at the beautiful brown eyes of the figure skater. For some reason, he didn't like the glasses the man regularly wore. It could be the odd colour.

The colour blue.

He now hated that colour, even if it was the shade of his own hair. Jin had to admit though, the icy blue eyes were grand on that man, but not when they stared at his one true love. That's when they were utterly disgusting.   
He tore the one picture where he and that man holding hands, the man staring at Yuuri like he was the only one in the whole world. Now it was just Yuuri, holding no one. He gasped, "don't worry darling, I'll make sure I'm the one you're holding." He said to himself as he began doing the same to all the photos and pulling out a few of his favorite Yuuri pictures.

He began to do research on abandoned homes, neighborhoods, possibly cities close by so he could share a house with his love. When his research came to an end and he was sure of a proper location, he researched his Yuuri.

~

**Search or Enter URL**

Yuuri Katsuki

**Yuuri Katsuki - Senior Division Figu-...**    
wikia>figureskating>Yuuri_Katsuki  
 _Yuuri Katsuki, a dime a dozen figure skater, is..._

\-----

 **Katsuki Here (@Katsuki._.Fanbase) • Instagram photos and videos**  
Instagram>katsuki._.fanbase  
  _701540 Followers, 12837 Following, 5479 Posts - See photos and videos of Yuuri Katsuki here_

\-----

**Katsuki Yuuri - Then Vs Now**   
Katsukiyuuri>comparisons>then_vs_now   
_How Katsuki manages to not only hold many silver and bronze medals this year but also..._

\----

~

A smirk slipped across his face as he stayed up reading everything about the beautiful man. There was so much information... Almost too much, but not his address, only the address of his hometown, Hasetsu, which he already knew about thanks to William. What he had figured out was enough though, down to the fact they had a dog.   
 _Malkin? Makkahcha? Mahchin. Makchin. That seems about right, I think._

Quickly shutting off his phone, he cleaned up the mess leaving the new information he found on his love on the table.

For once, Jin went to bed with a new smile on his face. 

 

_-next day-_

 

"I assume you're having trouble figuring out the location of Yuuri, correct?"

"Yes, but my plan has nothing to do with them being at home. I just need to know a route he takes or something..."

 _There was a route, one Yuuri takes while he's out on daily runs or walking the dog. Today happened to be a special day when Yuuri wasn't even on the ice._ Discussing this, they went back and forth on Jin's plans of the day over the phone.

He stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, looking around. So this is where Yuuri runs... Every...day?...   
His heart sped at the idea of actually seeing Yuuri. The one he'd been intending on seeing for the past week. Sadly the one thing he and William didn't discuss was times, so he would have no idea when Yuuri would come running practically into his arms.

A few people passed him, and each time he held his breath hoping it was Yuuri, but it never was, and now it was almost morning. Did he even sleep at all last night since Jin told him about Yuuri's daily runs? It didn't matter now, and he couldn't go back from what was done. William could have played him the entire time, could have told him all this stuff as some kind of terrible mind game. He felt tears prick his eyes as his gaze fell to the ground. He couldn't focus, not until the brown paws came into view, a dog? Wait.

Jin glanced up and there he saw him, the one he'd been waiting to see all this time. Yuuri Katsuki, the only problem was that he was walking the other way!

 _"Hey!"_  Yuuri paused midway in step turning towards to voice. "You're Yuuri Katsuki, right?" He asked in awe.

Yuuri grinned and nodded now approaching him.  Brown hazel eyes met with black. He blinked away the tears that almost fell awhile ago ready to finally talk to the amazing person known as Yuuri Katsuki.  
"Yes! Would you like an autograph or something sir?" Jin beamed and took out one of his favorite Yuuri pictures from his pocket. After all this time, from the first moment he saw this beauty, he knew he'd be so kind and wonderful and-  
A few more picture fell to the ground. That was unquestionably due to his lack of sleep last night.

"I- 'm so sorry.." He spoke, felling his face to become hot.  
"It's not a problem! I used to keep pictures of my idols as well."   
 _Idol? So that's what he thinks I am... Just another fan?_  
"Yeah... But I'm 6 years older than y- I.." Jin let out a tired sigh, he was now done being so embarrassed by his love. Now getting to his feet, he handed the Japanese male a photo without words. How could he speak now?   
Yuuri took the photo and smiled up at the man. All the photos in the world couldn't recreate the smile on his face.  He wanted more...   
"Like I said..." He opened the cap of a marker,  "its no problem at all."

After finishing the signature on the small photo, the words imprinted in cursive  
 _Yuuri K~_  
On the bottom right of the picture, he handed the Yu-Jin back the photo.   
"T- thank you so much.."   
"No, thank you!" Yuuri declared, walking away with his dog,  _Mahchin_.

It was now or never.

He began walking behind Yuuri, not saying any word. After a few blocks, he finally stopped. "Is there something I c- can help you with?" He stammers, but Jin didn't reply, just stood still letting the morning breath freeze his scalp.   
The next turns and twist around the block were uncoordinated and fast-paced. Now they were both running, but Jin easily kept up and so did Yuuri's poodle. Maybe because Yuuri was tired of walking for so long, much longer than Jin had.

The steps came as a blur and the wooden door slammed open before it could shut. Yuuri whimpered as his glasses slid off and phone cracked onto the floor.   
"That looked like it hurt... I'm sorry but you can't just lock me outside,  love." His breathing was heavy as he tried to crawl in the opposite direction. "Shhh... Your husband is out, right? Everything is fine... I'll take you to my place." Jin said in reply. He tiptoes over to Yuuri, also noticing his glasses were broken on the floor, but that's fine.   
  
He didn't like them to begin with.


	7. The Missing

"I'm sorry"

"but don't blame me, he told me to. I couldn't disrespect his wishes." 

Muffled bloody screams could be detected now. 

Innocence.

How old was he again? 

"Well, anyway... If you don't stop struggling then he will come back, and do you want him to come back? I don't think you do- so maybe you should stop being a slob."

A blunt kick was brought to the other man's side, he screamed through the gag again allowing the salt of his tears to stain the white cloth concealing his voice. 

"Is the only thing you do, cry? It's kind of sickening."

Gasping for air due to choked sobs, the older man clicked his teeth in disgust and pity. 

"Fine," He removed the bloodied white cloth from around his mouth and pulled out the saliva filled gag. 

Although the only thing that followed was the sobs he had been chocking on, he seemed somewhat calmer.

"You're so weak... no one did anything to you yet," The man reached downward, grazing a strand of hair out the boy's face. 

"Not until William says we can, not until he says we are successful."

The man's eyes widened as more tears slipped from his eyes. 

 

 

"I'm sorry."


	8. Chapter 8

_lee-says.so_  After his previous defeats last season you would have never thought Yuuri Katsuki would have now made a full on comeback in the skating world! Knocking down nearly all his opponents. What's he going to do now that he's up against the one who drove him there in the first place?... _read more_

  _Yuuri Katsuki finishes in 2nd place in his first competition of the year now facing against his husband Viktor Nikiforov...show more_

_Yo!tube.com/watch?v=ycgEL3S5WSM_

1,289 likes

**Comments**

_disrespected-natur3  · 13m_

  It's not a comeback if you were never  _there,_ to begin with.

_rdYeezy · 4m_

I'm so proud of him though, I've been a Katsuki fan forever. Before he was even this popular!!

_somebody_elses_love  · 11m_

@disrespected-natur3 That doesn't matter, he was always trying his best to get  _there_ and he still is trying. No one needs your distasteful ass comments. You're always calling every skater garbage.

_working4u · 7m_

_I agree with @somebody_elses_love    that's fucking rude._

_phichits.sterZ9000 · 4m_   

OMG YUURI!!!!!!!! HE DID IT AGAIN! Bless his soul!

_ikno345 · 12m_

He looks kinda... I dunno wobbly? On the ice, but the execution was extraordinary.

_disrespected-natur3 · 3m_

Okay, that's funny because as soon as someone states the truth about this particular skater then everyone wants to get offended? I'm so sorry for pointing this out, but it's not like he's ever even gotten first place. Not even now, where's his gold medal? He looks wobbly and if he were just  _slightly_ better than he'd get the gold- but no. 

_disrespected-natur3 · 3m_

Katsucci is probably too afraid to get anywhere beyond off the ground he's stuck on. He was less than an amateur before Viktor decided to step in and pity him. 

 _phichits.hampsterZ · 1m_     

That doesn't make what you're saying any less rude. He's trying so sdfu. Is ur name disrespectful natur3 because you're always being disrespectful? Because if so, what  _elses_love_   said is right and no one wants your distasteful comments.  
  
  
  
  


A smile spread across his face as he glanced down at his medal because he  _earned_ it, right?

Regardless of what anyone said, regardless of their laughs- he did this, and only he knows the hell he'd been in just previously. "Yuuri!" The Japanese male was engulfed in a hug as he yelped in surprise. "V-Viktor we're in publi-ack!" His breath caught as the platinum-haired male hugged him tighter.

"You were amazing! A little shaky, but still amazing."  

"I have done way better, do you just always need a reason to suffocate me?" He chuckled then relaxing into the embrace. 

"Of course not," He replied laughing himself. "I'd suffocate you if you just smiled in my direction." They stayed like that for a while until Viktor finally pulled away. "Yuuri," He stated, gaze hardening. "You were wobbly... and the face you made after landing some of your jumps... did you hurt yourself and you're not telling me about it?" Yuuri's heart sped as he searched for the right lie. 

Lie... Was this what he was doing now? Searching for lies to tell his husband to cover up his dirt trail, and deep down Yuuri knew that Viktor did deserve to know the truth behind his lies, but he couldn't bring himself to let them loose. If Viktor were to find out, what would he think of the younger man? He obviously couldn't take care of himself...like he let what happened to him, happen.  _Will he ever be strong enough?_  The thought made his eyes gloss and his vision to blur, and Viktor's gaze softened. "...  You can talk to me about it? Maybe we should go somewhere else ..." 

He was tempted, to spill right there, in public, letting everyone know how he was struggling and how desperately he needed help... before the darkness in his mind consumed him entirely. "No, t-there's nothing to talk to you about. Sorry if you felt that way." He spoke with the most genuine smile he could muster, pulled through the now dark crevice of his mind. 

Viktor simply stared at him, before replying "You're just being too stubborn for your own good..." 

His gaze finally broke as Viktor's 'name' was called from behind them, "Viktwhooore!" It sang as they both turned around to see a spinning Christophe, his gold reward swinging as he skipped over. He stopped in front of them and looked from Yuuri to Viktor then back at Yuuri. 

"Stop being so hard on your boyfriend." He scolds, glaring back at Viktor. 

Viktor sighed playfully before pressing a finger to his own lips. "But he didn't get me my gold medal. I do recall him promising more than one, da?" 

Chris thinned his lips and Yuuri shuffled his feet, looking down. 

"He just...I dunno. Yuuri, I know it's none of my business butttt," He paused and smirked.

"Spit it out, Chris." 

"Did you guys have sex yesterda-" Yuuri's face turned scarlet and Viktor sighed dramatically, cutting off Chris. 

"No, Chris." He snickered, "although I wouldn't mind that, I would never sabotage Yuuri from competing against me in the Grand Prix." He then winked in Yuuri's direction causing the younger man to hide his face. Chris simply watched them in amusement before adding, "Well it just seemed like he was stiff when it came to moving his ass." Viktor stayed quiet for a second, "You would know about that. Have you ever even had sex before going out on the ice?" He questioned, suddenly curious about what his friend had to say. 

Yuuri just hid his face slowly backing away from the conversation he didn't want to be a part of. "I-I'm just gonna go get changed..." He said running to the changing rooms.

It seemed he was always back here. Him and his bruises, staring back at him. They were now a dark purple colour, and he almost panicked if not knowing bruises get worse before they get better.

Yuuri sighed pulling on his pants and stuffing his costume into his bag. "If only they'd heal already..." He murmured to himself squeezing his eyes shut as he grabbed out his shirt. But the voice behind him startled as it spoke with much more profundity than ever before.

 "What. The. Fuck, are those?" 


	9. Chapter 9

"What the fuck are those?!" The voice repeated making Yuuri jump out of his skin at the familiar tone.

Time felt as if it slowed. He couldn't breathe, he wanted to breathe. It wasn't for him, was it outside?  _No ... Nononononono--!!_

Yuuri whipped his head around to see a  _more_ than upset blond teenager standing behind him. Quickly, he pulled his shirt over his head before moving towards him. The teen simply began baking away in revulsion. "W-w-wait-I...Yuri!-" He yelled lightly grabbing ahold of his friend's shirt. "What do you want- You know what, don't even answer that! Viktor is too fucking good for you." Yuuri winced at the words, a few tears he'd held back slipping free against his command. 

"Wha-"

"Don't give me that  _bullshit!_  Your face basically explains everything. I didn't want to believe you were cheating on him... I- I thought I knew you better ... Yuuri! ..." 

 _Is that really what he thinks these are..._  All he wanted was for the memories to go away, to skate like he would normally do... Not for his friend to think he was cheating on the best thing that had ever happened to him.

"D-don't tell Viktor,  _p- please_." He urged pitifully. The Russian made a face before turning his head away from the man."Why shouldn't I?" He asked tightly, "Why should I keep your slutty little secret safe when ... god he's just  _too_ good for you. Georgi was actually right... Shit."

"I'll tell him!" He cried, inching his head down in more guilt. The boy just stared ahead before commenting,"disgusting... I'll give you until tonight- but that's it." He then shook from Yuuri's grip and began walking away, not daring to look back at the man breaking down behind him.

\----

 _Push._  
The youth shoved the man causing him falter in his speech and look in his direction.

"I-Hey Yuri! Have you seen my Yuuri?" The man asked  _too_  happily, "He took off in your direction right?" 

Yurio stared at him blankly.  _He really is clueless, isn't he?_  "Didn't see him," he finally decided to say. "The real him anyway..." He muttered under his breath then beginning to walk off again.

"Okay? Wait, are you still coming to the diner after all this? Otabek is going to be there!" Viktor winked giving off a cheeky smile. 

"I guess..." Yuri spoke.

\--

_"Can I talk to you?"_

"What's up Yuuri? Its been forever since we've last spoke, whatcha need?"

"Well... I haven't been honest with Viktor, and I don't know how to approach him with this. I'm basically being forced to tell him what's going on now, so why not tell someone I can actually trust with this first?"

"Haha! You're joking, right? You, not being honest with Viktor? You're scaring me..."

"... Phichit..."

"Y- Yuuri?..."

"I- I... "

He swallowed heavily before continuing,

"There was a day... where Viktor and I weren't together. This was due to us having different days to take a day break from practice. I remember telling him... to wake me up in the mornings because when I woke up the bed was  _so_ cold and I wanted to be awake when he left. I wasn't able to see him most of that day- erm. A- Anyway... I did everything I would normally do. Slept longer, ate, watched TV, and caught up on the news. But I went out to walk Makkachin, normally I don't. Normally he was more patient and I was able to take him later in the day, possibly when Viktor got back even. But I took him in the morning because he kept scratching at the door. I didn't do anything wrong so far right? E- Everything I did w- wouldn't make Viktor hate me, right?"

"...What happened Yuuri? Did he do something because I swear to g-"

 _"No Phichit!"_  He squealed, a sob following.

"I'm sorry..." He replied.

"It's fine... I just..." Yuuri drew in a deep breath before exhaling a shaky breath. 

"I was walking him, then a fan stopped me. It was okay because fans always stop me- everywhere I go there are people wanting autographs or photos to post on their social media with me. So he says something like 'hey' and I turn around to greet him. We start talking for a bit a- and I kind of found him cute... He was around Viktor's age, I think 30ish. He had dark blue hair and beautiful midnight dark eyes... When I asked if he wanted an autograph he said yes and when he took out a photo, more dropped."

"How many...fell?"

"N- not too many. I just shrugged it off as an idol thing like Viktor and I are. I continued walking Makka, but h- he started following me. I asked why and he just stared at me like I said nothing like he wasn't even... _there_. Next thing I know, I started running after he wouldn't go away. But with the walk, Makka and I were already pretty exhausted. The only place I could think of was to run home and try and lock the door... we weren't in a very popular part of town, no one was nearby so early in the morning. "

"I ran into the house and slammed the door shut, but I couldn't lock it because he was right behind me. I ran to the bedroom and held the door shut. When the banging finally stopped I tried to call Viktor but the door swung openn and smacked my face...kinda why I'm missing a pair of glasses. I had two, but the other one shattered and now it's gone. "

"Time skip to when... after he... held a gun on me and took me somewhere far from town. I really tried to escape, I had no option and the car door wouldn't budge. I think it was on safety lock or something. I was too scared to do anything else besides open the door. I couldn't manage any better plan. 

Yuuri's voice began to shake, " _Despite my training, despite Viktor normally being by my side, despite learning not to ... Trust everyone like you used to. I failed."_

"He took me a-a-and he... uhm-"

"Oh my god- Yuuri what..."

"He raped me..."

The other end was quiet and so was Yuuri before hearing something shatter onto the floor. 

"I-" The other man sobbed as Yuuri stayed silent out of shock. "Shit..."

"P- Phichit-Kun?... Are you okay?"

"Don't be like that... Not now. I- I'm supposed to be the one asking you that. My god... Yuuri you didn't fail anyone. W- where are you? I'm flying out to you tomorrow."

The older man shuffled in his seat before responding, "I- in a b- bathroom in our hotel room."

"I wish I could ask you to stay there for the entire time until I get to you, but you  _need_ to tell Viktor about this."

"What?! No! I can't- I mean I have to, but he's just going to think-" 

"Nothing Yuuri. He's not going to think whatever nonscene your anxiety makes up in your head. How long ago did this happen? How long were you keeping this from me- from your  _husband?"_ Phichit asked intently, aiding his friend to reply honestly. 

"Phichit... Calm down."

"Calm down? Y- You were... I wasn't even expecting you to  _say_ it let alone sit on the  _phone_ and tell me it happened."

"I- I know Phichit... It's not fair. I just need to tell Viktor before Yurio does, I guess..." 

"Yurio? Yuri knew and he didn't help you?!" 

Yuuri paused trying to choose his words carefully. "Not... Exactly..." 

"What do you mean 'not exactly?' He knew, right?" 

"It was after my performance today. I was taking off my costume and he snuck in or something and saw all the...uhm... hickeys on my body and assumed it was because I was ch- cheat... was having an affair with Viktor. He said I had until tonight to tell him or he'd do it himself. I need to tell Viktor the truth and not what Yurio thinks. I know this."

"That's- "

 _Phichit!!_  His name was sounded in the background likely to be Celestino, his coach and Yuuri's former coach before Viktor.

"I really have to... I dropped the... Yuuri, are  _you_ okay?" Phichit asked in the softest tone Yuuri's ever heard him use. 

"I'm fine... Go Phichit, I'll be fine." He replied. 

"Okay... But if you don't reply to my text later tonight- I swear-"

"I hereby promise to answer that text and if I don't you have my consent to call Viktor yourself and tell him... happy?" He asked, a sad smile forming on his lips. 

"Okay. Be safe Yuuri."

\--

_And he's late. Of course, he's late_

"Yuri... He went in your direction earlier, didn't you see him at all?" Viktor asked, his nerves getting the best of his tone. 

"I saw a part of him." The blond retorted, crossing his arms. Viktor simply frowned in response. "So you saw him? Where is he then, he's not answering his phone... It's the middle of the night, and why do you keep saying 'a part of him' like he wasn't entirely there?" 

"Maybe if you weren't so clueless, you'd know..." _Don't let him get to you._

"Yurio... What's  _that_ mean?" The man asked firmly this time. "I'm not supposed to tell you... He said he'd tell you himself, but of fucking course, he's late."

"What's going on with Yuuri?" The woman, Minako, asked. Both her and the woman sitting next to her narrowing their gazes at him. "I told you he'll tell  _Viktor_ when he gets here, not you guys." 

"Yurio, can you just tell me?" Viktor said as more of a statement rather a question. "I said-" 

"Yuri!" Everyone at the table turned their gaze to Viktor as he raised his voice- which he normally never does. Finally, he stood up realizing the commotion he'd brought to the table, motioning for Yuri to follow him. They stopped in a more secluded part of the restaurant sightly away from the table, and Viktor began again. "If you know something that's going on with Yuuri just tell me. He hasn't been talking to me about it and anytime I try to ask I'm interrupted or he shrugs it off." 

"But he-"

"Yurio! Do you know how hard this is? I- I'm sorry to ask this much of you, but I love this man and I can't figure out any problems, so just 'shrugging it off and telling me he'd tell me' seems unlikely. I thought I could trust you, at least a little."

The blond took a step back in shock at Viktor's words. "I...he- he..." 

_"Viktor, he cheated on you."_

The words came quickly, and a knife stabbed through. His face instantly paled. "Y- You're lying..." 

"I'm not." 

"He couldn't have... how do you know?" He asked, a new form of distress stained in his voice. 

"I had... slight suspicions. I didn't believe it really, thanks to Georgi thinking about a possible affair between you two I instantly told him to shut the fuck up because every time I see you both I literally want to throw up...but... I checked anyway. I wanted to be wrong, but I saw hickeys all over him and bruises and when he begged me not to tell you...I knew it was true, and unless you did something to him right before competition there would be no way for me to believe it wasn't. I'm sorry, Viktor..." He finished, and by that time Viktor had more than a couple tears down his face. "You're crying ..."

Quicker than expected, he shaped up. Enough to wipe his face, digging into his pocket to get out the phone that was spammed with  _too_ many callѕ he just missed. "Y- yes?" He paused assumingly letting the other person on the phone talk, before responding again with an 'okay.'

The phone came on speakerphone and a familiar tone came on. "Yurio? Are you there?"  

"Phichit?" Yuri asked surprised the other man was looking for him. "Yeah- Have you seen Yuuri? I know about the conversation you guys were having about him and Viktor and he swore he'd reply to my text and his phone kept... holy  _shit!_  Yuri, have you seen him?!" Phichit asked, panic clearly picking up in his voice, setting them both on edge. "You know about ... the affair Phichit?" The Thai man sighed before answering once more. "That's not what happened, and I don't have the time to explain because my best friend is fucking missing. If I continue you both probably won't believe me, so I need to tell you what actually happened, giving you less than a summary, don't I? He w- was uhm recently kidnapped and raped, and that's why you saw all the... hickeys... I'm assuming neither of you has seen him?" 

Everyone was quiet for a couple seconds, "Yuuri was- P- phichit, what?!" Viktor basically screamed into the phone causing the whole restaurant to look in his direction. "We were together all the time, I don't ...  _When?!"_  

"I- I don't know! Yuuri told me over the phone and he swore to talk to me and he didn't-" 

The phone began ringing with another call on the other side and Viktor froze seeing Yuuri's name.He clicked like the phone was his lifeline,"Yuuri, hello can you hear me?!"

No one responded, but a shuffling could be heard on the other side of the phone. "Viktor what's going on?" Minako and Maria approached, "And wasn't my brother supposed to be here?" Maria asked walking behind the older skater. 

No one replied, however waiting for Yuuri to say something.

"VIKT-" Followed by a muffled scream and everyone including Minako and Maria's faces paled as Yuuri's line hung up.


	10. Chapter 10

_9:36PM_

It was upon Maria's terrified screaming Viktor snapped out of his daze of terror himself. "Was that my brother?! What the hell is-" But Viktor dropped everything, running harder than he had ever before, still keeping Phichit on the phone. "P-phichit!" He gasped for air as he ran in the direction of the hotel. "Where was he last?!" 

"In you guy's hotel room!" 

Viktor nodded to himself running up the steps to the place he and Yuuri had been staying in. Another pair of quick footsteps sounded behind him. "Yuri, why'd you follow me?" They both paused, wiping the sweat from their face. 

"I... It's my fault he showed up late. I insulted him to the point of tears, and I was..." Viktor finally turned around to meet his gaze, "...wrong, I was wrong. Please let me help find him..." 

There was a faint pause, just gaze meeting gaze before he replied, "fine."   
  
  
  


_9:19PM_

Boots meeting solid ground echoed through the hallway. The man stopped peering his eye out to check the next hallway, a security guard was approaching. Probably checking the area after the lights went out. "If he sees us then he'll definitely do more than question our outfits..." Jin whispered lowly to his ally. 

Both crouching down behind the wall they waited. The older man pulled out a knife, discerning how close the guard was getting to them. It felt like time counted down in his head as they got lower and lower to the ground, the guard getting closer and closer.  
 Descending only to reascend in a few seconds. 

3, 2, 1...

The guard looked one direction before turning his head to look the other. Swiftly his ally held him from behind, twisting one arm around his neck and the other behind his head. The guard's face paled before turning red from losing his air supply. For a long while, the man struggled and fought for his life, until he was gone. Light drained from his eyes, his partner dropped him before motioning for Jin to follow him. 

They moved quickly, finding their way down hallways, searching for the room number... R56.

 

_9:37PM_

Yuuri had a bad feeling... not like the ones he always seemed to get now, not the ones that are fake due to his PTSD that he  _knew_ he had. Yuuri wasn't stupid, nor was he oblivious. Maybe on the outside... maybe at first glance, you see him as weak, stupid, fat, and maybe in a sense, he was. But after the power went out in the hotel, he got a  _dangerous_ feeling. The darkness began caving in his mind as he slipped out his room. He couldn't stay there, not with the paranoia eating at his chest. Maybe Viktor would still be at the diner. Originally Yuuri wanted to skip and tell Viktor about what happened later tonight, but now? Now he wanted nothing more than to be with his lover. Being closer and assuring his safety might rid of the dangerous feeling he was getting.

The Japanese male began speed walking down the dark corridor of rooms. Grabbing out his phone he clicked it on when-  _No..._  
Quick pacing footsteps came from behind him, without looking back he began running. Yuuri didn't care if or if it was someone coming to help him, he was scared and the footsteps growing closer to him only made the feeling of  _danger_ worse. So phone in hand, he ran to the nearest staircase, not bothering with the elevator. Because this is  _real life_  and why would he wait for the elevator door to open when he could lose the person chasing him down the stairs?

Yuuri stumbled while skipping two steps at a time. However, the footsteps only got louder the further he got down.

Finally, he felt what he was originally trying to avoid this whole time. His breath was knocked out of him as a large hand pushed him downward.

His eyes screwed shut while he tried to find his balance. His body rolled down the last few steps. His now bent glasses slid off his face onto the concrete while Yuuri fell to his knees landing hard on the concrete as well, then scrid to his side, falling numb as the impact stung his knees and chest. He frantically tried to move his arms, legs, or neck to stand and run away once he had seen the figure in front of him.

"どうして？"  
Dōshite?  
(why?)

The man smiled taking a few steps forward.

"私はあなたを魅了したかった。。"  
Watashi wa anata o miryō shitakatta..  
(I wanted to surprise you...)

He gave a cheeky smile taking something from behind his back, walking over to the helpless man.

"Just like Viktor..."

He whispered.

Yuuri pulled out his phone, quickly pressing the contact he kept on speed dial. His hands shook as the phone rang. One of the masked men sped walk over to him. He wacks the phone causing it to slide to the other side of the room. Regardless of his injuries, Yuuri crawled over to it screaming his husband's name.

A sudden weight was put on his back as his mouth was covered with a hand. He screamed and bit the large hand as hard as he could, struggling under the weight. The man yelped, slapping Yuuri across the face.

He whimpered and coughed as his nose began to sting, and for a second, darkness overtook him.

_9:52PM_

When Yuuri woke up he hadn't known what was going on. His body was cold and his legs hurt, but upon regaining his memories instantly he realized he was still on the floor of the staircase and the other man was now approaching. Did he pass out only to wake up seconds later?

Getting on his elbows, his eyes stung as his knees ached. He began standing anyway, yet one of the men from before seized his arms dragging him along the floor. He screamed and began to twist in the hold, trying to struggle his way out, but to no avail, the men were much more experienced than he originally thought.

They approached a door unlike the other hotel rooms, this one had the words 'Office' where the room number should be. Yuuri screamed as loud as he could one final time before being brought into the room. 

 

 

_9:54PM_

"Fuck, did you hear that?!" The teen asked as a scream echoed through the hallway. Viktor looked around before commenting, "this way!"

They both sprint in the dark before finally stopping next to a staircase. "Is that...blood?" Yurio asks, the slight blood stain splatter glaring at them. The older Russian said nothing as he walked further into the staircase. "...Yuuri" He muttered, lifting the broken blue frames, a couple tears sliding free again. "We have to find him," Yurio spoke. Viktor looked around before eyeing a door. This one, unlike the other doors, had the name 'Office' where the room number should be. It's the only obvious thing they have seen so far besides Yuuri's broken glasses.

"Do we just go in, or do we knock... There could be people still in there." Yuri stated looking to Viktor for an answer. The older male stood staring at the door thinking of what to do, but upon hearing his husband's scream on the other side slapped Viktor awake as he took a couple steps back, running his shoulder into the door.   
A few more times and the door swung open. A female screamed as Viktor took a look at his surroundings.  
"We weren't expecting you," A hard surface was pressed against his skull as he took a good look at his surroundings.

Yuuri's face was paled as he lay on the floor by a desk staring at Viktor with his hands tied. There was an elder woman behind the desk and a male slightly younger than Yurio hiding behind the desk.

"Vi-ktor..." Yuuri stuttered, tears filling his eyes.   
Viktor stood completely still afraid of what was to come.   
"It's nice to meet you, Viktor." The man pointing a gun at him said, a smile stained with his tone. "I'm sure you can tell what's going on right now, right? Well, today you're losing the thing you care so deeply for. I would ask you how it feels if we weren't on a tight schedule. Actually... Partner. How much time do we have?" The other masked man looked up from his phone and calls out, "25 minutes."

The first man chuckled before responding, "seems like I actually do... So Viktor, how does it feel?" The man asked. The Russian stayed silent and the man clicked his teeth in a deadly way. "Alright, you asked for it." The man backed away from Viktor and stepped over Yuuri.

Reaching behind the table the man pulled up something. A woman's scream could be heard as the elderly woman that hid behind the desk didn't even have time to beg for her life before she took a blow to the head. Yuuri sobbed as the teenage boy screamed at the man. Tears filling his eyes.

The man threw the woman to the ground, stepping over the corpse before pulling up the arm of the teenage boy that had been screaming. "N-no!..."    
"Fine!" Viktor yelled through tears of his own. The man chuckled "So how does it fucking feel, Viktor?" The platinum-haired man glared at him. If only looks could kill...  
"Terrible..." He stated blatantly, barely audible.   
"What?! I can't fucking hear you!"   
Viktor's eye twitched, "terrible!" he repeated louder hoping someone would come by and hear what was going on in the room.

"Really? Wow." The man laughed re-aiming the gun.   
"Yurio~" the man sang as the blonde froze. "You're coming with us, got it?" He nodded slowly as the gun went off again. Everyone looked at the younger boy behind them expecting to see the blood-spattered onto the wall behind them as someone else fell to the ground.   
  
  


Yuuri's heartbeat stopped and his eyes froze in one spot.   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

 

_"VIKTOR!!"_   
  
  
  
  
_  
_

 

 

_10:00PM_


	11. Chapter 11

_(I hate you... I hate you... I hate you...)_ The raven-haired male balled together sitting in now a very dark corner.

"What the fuck did you do to him?" William asked, his face glowing from a computer screen. "Uhm... We got rid of Viktor and he's just been mumbling shit and screaming this whole time, we didn't do anything..." The kid made an exhausted sigh closing his eyes, then staring at Jin. "Where's that blonde kid?" He retorted.

"Right here..." Yu-Jin began turning the PC screen to show a sedated blonde teenager.

William giggled, "finall-" The van shook and the screen fell to the ground causing William to be face first into it. "Hey!" He yelped, "well you can't blame me... Going to Japan by car isn't going to be a walk in the park. Anyway, you did want the blonde while I get Yuuri, right?" He sat the screen back up again, only to have it nearly slip back out his hands due to the look on William's face.

Did he say something wrong? Surely not... William came to him claiming to find him a new love, so why does he like so upset? "William?..." He instantly shaped up giving a seemingly fake smile. "Don't worry, we'll talk more when you get here. But until then, no more stopping unless it's for gas." The Korean diligently nodded before the screen turned off and shut it  
Not much further now...

——

"Anyone else not wondering why Yuuri never showed up, Viktor and the Russian Yuri both ran out the restaurant and those two women Yuuri knows just started crying?..." Sengu Lee asked breaking the nervous silence at the table. "Maybe something happened to Yuuri since he didn't show up tonight, what if he was murdered?!" JJ said sarcastically, waving his arms around. Sengu just stared at him blankly, "what if he was? It's possible with how they all reacted to the phone call they received, and joking about it only makes you look bad."

Chris peered up at the others around the table after staring at his phone. "It's been thirty minutes, maybe we should go look for them?"

They all agree and began walking off to the hotel.


	12. The Missing

"Viktor!!" The room rang as his body began to instantly sting and weaken. The room spun and his vision blurred due to the overwhelming pain in his abdomen. Everything was too loud, and all he could hear was shouting.   
"Viktor! -Let me fucking go you son of a bitch!" Was that... Yurio?  
A pained wail followed by another painful sting to his stomach passed causing him to fall. Before he knew it, he was left in the room...alone.

The last thing he heard was Yuuri screaming before silence overtook the atmosphere.

His breathing paced faster as he looked down at his stomach- that had been shot twice, dripping with blood.

Blood splashed out his mouth landing on the once untouched carpet. "...Sh-shit" He commented bitterly, instinctively closing in on himself.

Viktor could practically taste pennies now, but he couldn't die. Not now- not when he and Yuuri had everything they ever wanted. Not when they were so... happy. His life couldn't have just gotten fucking better just to end, right? Wrong.

That's not how the world works and Viktor was so lucky to find such a sweet caring man such as Katsuki Yuuri. He would force himself to crawl out the room and find help if he needed to.

Fumbling with his pockets, Viktor began wheezing- feeling himself slowly lose consciousness.

He was going to  _die_.

His breathing began to slow as his world began to fade. Tears filled his eyes,  _I can't die. I can't..._

Then a light sob filled his ears, "Okaasa..."

Viktor slowly lifts his head to see the same teenage boy from a little earlier. In a sense, he was reminded of himself as the black longish locks fell over his eyes, the now empty terrified green orbs staring at the elder woman the masked man had killed. He wanted to help the poor kid, but as every second passed and another thought of his came to mind, was where another second was wasted to which he could be getting help.

"Hey..." He basically whispered, still tasting the blood he'd thrown up.

The kid didn't move however, his blank eyes stayed on the woman. And he couldn't blame him...  
"L- Look, I know sh-she was your family, right?..." Viktor gasped for air, the air he was running short on. "M- my family was t- taken too... And I finally just made a new one... S- so, please... Please help me get them b- back. I'll help you, but  _please_...

Viktor held out his hand, unlocking his phone and handing it to the younger kid. But he still didn't move. His time was running short and his last hope wouldn't even help him.

Viktor's eyes rolled backward as his lids closed shut. Losing everything, his arm fell and his phone slipped out of his palm and made a thud onto the floor.

_He was going to die now, wasn't he?_

The boy turned his head in the direction of the odd man. He was likely dead... _(I don't want more people to die.)_

Earlier he was talking about family,  _would he help me find a new family if I help him?_

His legs felt like jello as he made his way over to the seemingly dead man.  _(I don't want_ _him_ _to die.)_

He scrolled through the phone and stared at the glowing screen. Was it 811 or 911?... Some people even say 611. He never had to call an ambulance until now. 911 will have to do as it's the most common...

Tapping the screen, the numbers entered '911' as he pressed the call button.

"Nine one one, what's your emergency?"

"My mom and this guy were shot and two other guys were just kidnapped." He stated blankly.

"Do you know their current state?"

"I think the white hair guy might be dead, but he just passed out a couple seconds ago, the other two guys who were kidnapped left a while ago so I think they're gone for good, and my mom... She's dead." There was a slight pause as the woman on the phone waits for him to be completely done before speaking once more. "Okay, stay on the phone. I'm sending someone to you. Can you tell me what floor of the hotel you're staying at is on?"

"I think this is the fourth floor and I'm in an office..."

They continued talking on the phone for a while. And for those couple minutes, his world blanked. He was so damn sad, so why are no more tears coming?... Was there something wrong? Was there a reason he's not still crying over his dead mother?

There was a knock on the door and he stood on his two wobbly legs to answer it. Two police officers showed up first entering the room followed by a couple people with a stretcher.

While his mother was wheeled out with a blanket over her head the other guy was rushed away.

He couldn't help but follow...

When the group arrived at the hotel, they were surprised by all the ambulance and police cars lined up in front. Were they even allowed to go in now? JJ tried to get answers out of the police officers while Seugil Lee took a look around, trying to spot something that caught his eye. Chris however, was shoving his way under the police tape after seeing his best friend in such a state. "Viktor! Oh my god..." He started running to the ambulance where he was being wheeled into.

"Clear!"

_Beep_

"It's not working," 

"again!" Someone injected something below his neck screaming at the other people in the truck. "V- Viktor?..."

_Beep_

"Again!" One of the men rubbed two objects together before placing it on Viktor's chest. Others were working on stopping the bleeding and another shot was placed into his right arm.

_Beep Beep_

"Clear!"  _I can't watch..._   _No- I can't stop watching._

_Beep- beep- beep-_

The beeping started spazzing, and that's when he felt himself being pulled back. He couldn't leave! Not when Viktor was...

The beeping stopped now making one sound and so did the arm pulling him back.

It seemed like the whole world froze...

Viktor

Gone?...

It definitely wasn't impossible, but hell... For a long time, it certainly felt like it. For a long time, it certainly felt like his friend would live forever. Chris never thought of the possibility of losing Viktor Nikiforov. And it was too late to start... What would the world think? What would Yuuri think? Because he couldn't seem to tell what  _he_ thinks. Not at the moment anyway, it seemed too easy- simple... and way too real. 

_Gone._

The beeping started again.

And everyone's eyes widened to see a Viktor still alive although panicking. "S- Stabilize him!-"

"Sir, you need to leave."

Chris finally complied making his way from behind the police tape, being escorted by an officer. JJ and Seungil were waiting for him on the other side and began questioning what he saw if his face didn't just give that away already. "I think..." He stared them both in the eye to make his sayings sound legit. "I think I saw Viktor...die." He stated as both of their faces mixed with horror and he knew he had to properly explain himself.

"He passed for a while but pulled out of it at the end. His heart stopped then started again." He explained further making sure they understood what just happened. "Did you see either of the Yuuri's'?" Jean asked curiously. "I saw..." Chris referred back to his memories. He didn't see them, but he did see someone who had a blanket on top of their..."Not exactly, but I did see someone with a blanket covering their face. Could that have been one of the Yuuri's'?" They all frowned. "Then where would the second one be?..."   
  
  


"Yuuri!"  The teenager screamed feeling the man's grip tighten on his shoulders. He muffled a scream, struggling against his bonds as his body was lifted back up by his arms and slammed back to the ground. "Shut up! You're only making things worse by panicking."

How could he possibly not panic? His friend was being taken away and there was nothing he could do about it, and he hadn't the chance to even apologize for what he did to him. Not to mention Viktor got shot and is probably dead, and now he's vulnerable and helpless. He couldn't help but think the guy on top of him was  _fucking stupid_. 

His eyes wandered to Yuuri's small frame as he was drugged again and scooped up by a different man. He felt so useless, watching his friend be taken away by some monster. When Yuuri wouldn't answer the phone he just thought maybe the naive man just was ignoring everyone on purpose, that maybe he felt guilty for taking his love for granted and was hiding like a coward, however upon finding out he was assaulted and not just that- likely being assaulted again over the phone made him feel like more than an idiot. It was completely out of line for assuming such things about the man. And now when he needed him the most, he not only was unable to do anything but almost was managed to get kidnapped himself. If Yuuri were to see him as anything now it would be a baby. A baby unable to protect nor take care of anyone aside from himself. Yuuri wasn't disgusting, Yuuri wasn't pathetic. He was. 

Yurio's eyes filled with tears as the other Yuuri got further away from his reach. One last time he screamed through the gag before he was completely out of sight.

If- no... _when_ they see each other again; he  _will_ protect him.  
  
  
  
  
  


 _Well, this is unfamiliar..._ He thought to himself, staring upwards towards the ceiling with half-lidded eyes. The ceiling of which was  _too_ bright to possibly be his. 

The platinum-haired man sat up in his spot looking at his surroundings. The room was unfamiliar, but upon taking note on some of the familiar decors he realized it was a hospital.  _Yuuri must be worried if I'm in a hospital._  "When did I?... Oh." He simply stated, his memories becoming clearer the second he began to speak. Yurio was gone. Yuuri was gone. I'm alone and no one knew what happened to them. 

A couple of tears slid down his face as the memories of his fiance and friend that day clouded his mind. He had to think smart, had to come up with a proper plan to rescue them. Because only he could... 

The door clicked, but his eyes did not falter. They stayed in one spot as people filled the room. The room that was  _too_ bright. 

"Viktor?" A female voice spoke, but Viktor was too busy. Too busy looking at that one spot- he couldn't think properly. Not that he needed to though, all he needed to know was Yuuri was missing, all he needed to do was save him. There was no time to think of himself because for all he knew; Yuuri could be shot one thousand more times than he had. His fiance could be going through hell and back again while he's here resting from merely a gunshot wound. I'm fine now,  _I should be able to leave soon, right?_

"Viktor!" A male voice snapped him awake from his thoughts. Realizing it was only Chris Viktor was tempted to just ignore his friend. But that was the problem; he was his  _friend_ , and that would be overly disrespectful. So he focused on the Swiss man. The mans gaze softened, a look of concern and worry now spreading across his face.

"Are you...okay?" He asks and the older man didn't know how to reply, or if to reply at all. How long has it been since the Yu(u)ri's were taken?

"No." He replied, watching Chris flinch at the words. "How long?" He retorted almost ignoring his concerned friend at this point.

"Wha-"

"I mean... How long since they were taken?" He questioned forgeting that Chris had no idea what happened in that office room. "...Taken?"

"The...oh." Was his brain not working? Maybe it was something that happened, but Viktor felt...off.

Not just because of the overwhelming sadness of lossing his lover, but something was wrong. He couldn't put his finger on it just yet. "You weren't there, were you?" Chris reverted his gaze then moving around Viktor's bed to take a seat. It was then the woman that was trying to get his attention stepped out the room.

"Vitya," he began making direct eye contact with his friend. "I saw you die yesterday."

And there it was... The answer he needed. Its been a day, and whether he died or not that day; it wouldn't change the fact his husband and friend were gone.

"When me, Phi, and Gil-Lee came looking for you guys I saw you being wheeled into an ambulance. Next thing I know I run over to you and you...die. The machine stops and everyone stops moving, I think the woman was about to record your time of death when you pulled through anyway. Thank god you did... I haven't ever considered the fact- you... Dying? Was I even supposed to consider that? The Viktor Nikiforov dying?" He asked, not expecting an answer.

"I guess you have to now, because I'll rather die trying to get Yuuri back than sitting here doing nothing..." He murrmed to himself and Chris sat up in shock.

"Vik- I know i- it's hard. But please don't... Kill yourself." He stated quietly and Viktor's eyes widened.

"I saw someone being wheeled out of the hotel and I th- think it might have been one of the Yu(u)ri's."

He's wrong... They were taken. That elderly woman is likely the one Chris is refiering to. "Nononono-  Chris," he began watching Chris's doubtful expression. "Two men took both of them. Did no one find anything?"

Chris sat quiet, not saying a word but looking towards the ground, possibly choosing his words carefully...Or

_He doesn't believe me?_


	13. Chapter 13

_This... This isn't my ceiling?_

Blue eyes blinked once, then twice trying to get ahold of the strange new white ceiling. "Viktor? You're awake!" A voice speaks in excitement, but who  _was_ Viktor and who was the man speaking so loudly at him? Small footsteps sounded moving further away from his ears. "Mr. Nikiforov?" This voice was different, it sounded a bit rougher and a little deeper. "Something's wrong..." Another voice said and as more voices started speaking up he zoned them out because he wasn't Viktor, he wasn't Mr. Nikiforov? Or... was he?   
  
  


"Why isn't he responding to us?" Senguil-Lee asks while not taking his eyes off the unresponsive Viktor. They all stare watching his little movements, such as blinking or the slight twitching or his head. The doctor begins moving closer taking something out of his pocket. He bends over the bed first staring into Viktor's eyes. "Viktor?" He tries to get a response out of him before shinning a light into his eyes. "Y- yes?" He finally answers back causing multiple sighs of relieve. "Do you know that you're Viktor?" The doctor also asks with caution.  
  
  


✗ ✗ ✗

Yoosung trash: VIKTOR NIKIFOROV LOST HIS MEMORY?! 

**Welcome to our chat discussing various news on ice skating! Please suggest our chat with friends and family!**

_Maya__22: Omfg... Yuuri didn't show up last competition, and I haven't been seeing him in any pictures Phichit uploaded, doesn't he ALWAYS post pictures of him when_ _they're_ _together right after competition?!?!_

__SirMelodias_sama: This can't be happening..._

_SirMelodias_sama:    
 **[**  Yuuri Katsuki is missing                                                                                                                      **]**  
 **[** The legendary dime a dozen figure skater as well as Viktor Nikiforov's husband... **]**

_Peachy_keen: WHAT THE FUCK?!_

**Warning  @peachy_keen, please refrain from swearing on our server, we like to keep it child-friendly, thank you!**

_Cali_Kid23: Yuuri is... missing?... GIVE ME THE ADDRESS OF THE BASTARD WHO TOOK HIM FROM US_

_BBBBlackBBear: THIS IS LITERAL BULLSHIT!_

**[**  Yuri Plisetsky is missing                                                                                                                     **]**                            
 **[** Yuri Plisetsky, Known as the Russian fairy and the student of Yakov Feltsman w... **]**

_Peachy_keen: ...what the actual fucking is going on? Did someone seriously kidnap both Yuuri's?..._

__SirMelodias_sama: I have no idea, but I can't stop crying rn._

_Peachy_Keen: It sucks that I don't know them, we as fans have to sit here unable to do shit_

_Peachy_Keen: Someone is getting away with doing this and all we can do is_

_Peachy_Keen: SIT HERE AND DO NOTHING_

_Peachy_Keen: This really fucking sucks-_

**Warning @peachy_keen, please refrain from swearing on our server, we like to keep it child-friendly, thank you!**

**Warning @bbbb** **lackbbear** **, please refrain from swearing on our server, we like to keep it child-friendly, thank you!**

**Warning @cali_kid23, please refrain from swearing on our server, we like to keep it child-friendly, thank you!**

**Warning @peachy_keen, please refrain from swearing on our server, we like to keep it child-friendly, thank you!**

**@peachy_keen  Has been removed from the server**   
**Reason: Due to profanity**

_Cali_Kid23: Rip... hahaha_

_DalviAAAAAAAAA: Now that Yuuri's kidnapping is being brought up... I remember this one post on Instagram of this fan seeing Yuuri on the...bus. His clothing was tattered and he looking a little beat up but no one ever brought it back up._

_DalviAAAAAAAAA: Like did no one even notice?_

_DalviAAAAAAAAA:_ _ What if he was already kidnapped before?! _

_PandaKiz: Holy shit, you're right!_

_PandaKiz: FUCK THIS IS MY THIRD TIME! I MEAN- DON'T KICK ME MR BOT_

**@pandakiz  Has been banned from the server**   
**Reason: Due to profanity**

_Cali_Kid23: lololol_

_MPrime: Is no one else crying as hard as I am? Viktor lost his damn memory and both Yuuri's are missing. I mean...c'mon._

_Some11111: I am I think, but it's not like we can really do anything abt it._

_MPrime: We can... try looking for them? idk_

_Sao_es_garbago: How? @MPrime_

_MPrime: I don't know how, but I hope someone comes up with something._

_Some11111: Ym me?_

_MPrime: what?_

_Some11111: *some11111 is what you met?_

MPrime: ...

**mprime has left the server.**


	14. Chapter 14

"Is there anything at all you remember? Maybe something from right after you passed out maybe?" The doctor he came to figure out the name to be Dr. Tee. Viktor... Or at least, that's who he thinks he is, has been being questions all day. The immense amount of doctors and nurses constantly checking up on him was exhausting and confusing him all the more. "No, I didn't even know I passed out." The doctor sighs slightly and writes something down on a blank piece of clean white paper, then checking something off on another. "What's the last thing you remember?" The Dr. Tee asks, making sure to keep up eye contact. "Th- the last thing is... Makkachin?" He says more or less like a question. "M- my dog...right?" He mutters silently.

"Mr. Nikirorov?"

"Hm?..."

"Would it be alright if I let in some guest? Seeing them may help you remember certain things that may have happened to you in the past whilst their presence were there." To that, Viktor simply nods. Maybe there was something important he forgot? Like a competition, he missed- an ice skating... Ice skating? Do I ice skate as a career?

"Viktor?" He lifts his head to a pair of hazel brown eyes, they're so beautiful they make his head warm, but the beautiful feeling turns into something more as his mouth is left agape. More people came in, but he couldn't seem to take his eyes off the beautiful hazel brown the woman's eyes were. They remind him of... "Yuuri," he spoke causing everyone's eyes to widen slightly, "You're Yuuri's mom, right?" And now questions are so blatantly there, his head hurts. Viktor half closes his eyes because surely the room was always this bright.

Who's Yuuri, and why do I remember him so easily after looking at that woman? Why isn't Yuuri here to visit and yet his mom is? Something happened, but why would I know that. Viktor groans at the sharp pain in his head and mashes his eyelids shut to soothe the pain. Just thinking about Yuuri brings up old memories, maybe seeing him will- "Yes, I'm his m- mother... Miss K- Katsuki." Miss Katsuki walks closer to his bed, taking something from out of a green bag Viktor just realized she had in the first place. She was a very small woman, her hair brown while her eyes hazel and her figure a little chubby, but he could definitely imagine someone as kind as her being his Yuuri's mom. Wait, his Yuuri?!

"I brought some katsudon because I know how much you and Y- Yuuri love them... Sorry if it's not too warm anymore, but hopefully its better than gross hospital food." She says while taking out a bento shaped box and handing it to the confused male. Viktor stares at the box before remembering something important. "Yuuri's favorite food was... Cheeseburgers rig-"

JJ snorts and Chris covers his mouth his hand to hide his laughter while Senguil-Lee facepalms. "lol!"

"Did you just say 'lol' Phichit?"

"N- no..."

"This is no time to be laughing at him-"

"Don't laugh at me, laugh with me! I WAS JOKING! Oh by the way," Viktor says, shoving some katsudon in his mouth, "what happened to my husband?" He asks tilting his head and gulping down food. The funny atmosphere changes as Senguil-Lee steps forward. "Viktor, this may seem sudden, but we were all hoping after you woke up, you'd be able to tell us that. It seems you have some of your memory back, thank god... But you were there when they... Disappeared and neither the authorities nor ourselves have any leads."

Viktor's hands begin to shake so much that he has to forcefully drop the chopsticks. "Disappear?..."


	16. The Missing

vιĸтor!

вlood ѕplaѕнeѕ onтo тнe ғloor. wнy тнe нell ιѕ нe мovιng ғυrтнer away?! vιĸт!-

_"yυυrι!"_

_✗ ✗ ✗_

"Ugh..."His head feels like it's been smashed between a thousand god damn doors. The world is spinning, and even though he's had worse headaches, this would definitely be one of his top three. It takes him a few seconds to register what's going on. His limbs aches and as if complete darkness wasn't enough; he couldn't breathe correctly. The cloth concealing his vision felt wet against his forehead and Yuuri couldn't figure out if it was sweat or someone poured something on him.

"Yuuri!" Someone was ... was someone screaming his name this whole time? "Yes?" The raven-haired boy replies lowly. And he's just now noticing how dry his throat is. Wait...

"Yuuri! I'm so glad you're safe." Someone's crying, but he recognizes that voice. "Minam-"

"Yes! I'm so sorry Yuuri, I got myself kidnapped a while ago." The kid's voice shakes, and not in all the ways he cries when "fanboying" over some of the skaters. Yuuri's heart aches at the sobbing, and he's completely silent for a few minutes to collect himself.  _Wake up,_ because he- they, Yurio, everyone needed to get out of here.

"Minami?" Yuuri says carefully. He hears the boy sniffle and makes a quick "hm," sound. "Fill me in please, is Yurio not in this room?" Minami sniffles a few more times before replying, "H- he is, but he's still unconscious. I don't know where we are, but it looks like a basement, and I've been here... I've been here for, I think, about a couple months, maybe longer."

Yuuri's month gaps, the shock hasn't yet caught up with him and he immediately responds.   
"When did you get kidnapped, Minami?"

...

"...After I left...your house. So no one told you about it, huh."

He doesn't reply, how could he? How could he not realize Minami was...gone? He couldn't even imagine what the people here did to him. How could he be so blind? The shock catches up with him and he feels his eyes leak, his mouth curves and he bites his bottom lip. Unmistakably, Minami hadn't been around, but he never thought to question it, not even after he himself was captured weeks later. Yuuri knew, ** _knew_** he wasn't dumb, but how could he be so oblivious these past months? "Minami..." His own voice shakes, "I'm so... so sorry, Minami."

"Wah?! Yuuri? You didn't-"

_"Ah, I see you two like chatting. But I need that to stop, you see... I made a promise to these guys in exchange for bringing you and Yurio here. Hold still please, Mina."_


	17. Chapter 17

"You okay?" Jin asks after setting down his cup of coffee. Of course, he's not. His husband disappeared and he can't remember how, but he  _was_  there. And it's technically his fault for not being able to remember anything. Luckily, he remembered bits and parts of what happened, the part where Yuuri ignored him for most of the day and the taxi ride with Jin was coming back to him. He can't help but feel bits and pieces before and some after are still missing. "Well... although I lost parts of my memory, they've all slowly came back to me, but I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to remember what happened to Yuuri..." Jin folds a leg over the other and writes down something in a small notebook, "Why do you think that? You said your memory was coming back to you, right?"

His eyes lock onto the carpet, "I had some kind of trigger for most of the stuff. Like when I saw your card on the table, I automatically thought about the ride, and the rest of our conversation just came back to me. I have no idea what happened to Yuuri, so I don't know where to look."

 

 

 

He wouldn't show it, but what Mr. Viktor Nikiforov was saying, pissed him off. Pissed him off so much.  _So, not only did you fail to protect Yuuri, but you also had the nerve to lose your memory. That's probably why you feel like shit right now..._ He thought to himself The room was quiet, and he took a few seconds to figure out what to say.

"I- I suppose that is w-why, yeah. But I know better than to... uhm... think it was completely my fault..." Viktor chuckles awkwardly. Jin's eyes widen in fear. He said that out-loud?! "I can't believe I ju- I mean, what I mean is, you're weak now, right? So If you have me on your side to help you; I'm convinced we can retrieve your husband!" He also chuckles awkwardly and accidentally drops his notebook when rubbing the back of his neck. He just laughs louder as it reveals a sketch. Viktor kept his eyes averted as he hurriedly scooped up the drawing. He was supposed to be taking notes, not drawing pictures! "Ah, or maybe, we can try to regain your memory first before we start searching..."

 

Jin was the only cop he knew supposably who did their work on cases like kidnap. Jin was the one who insisted coming to him first if something like this were to happen. "I remember nothing from that day. I remember nothing from this month either really. I'm sure all we were doing was getting ready for competition. And yet, in just one day... Yuuri and Yurio are gone."  _Maybe it is my fault,_  "When will we be able to try and help my memory, and when will we start looking for them?" Viktor begins asking desperately. Jin's eyes stay in his sketchbook as he begins smirking. Desperation is always someone's downfall. "How about we start today?" 

Viktor's mouth gaps, he wasn't expecting them to be able to start today, although he should've despite his impatience. "O-of course! Thank you so much, Mr. Cho! Hopefully, this isn't any trouble, I'm sure you could tell how impatient I was, sorry." Jin's smile enlargens as he finally closes the 'notebook'. He chuckles and answers, "Of course it's no trouble at all, I said I was a fan of your's, and Jin is fine Viktor." He then gives a cheeky smile to top the cake and stands to shake his hand. Viktor smiles as well, gladly shaking his hand. 

"Let's get started!" 

 

_✗ ✗ ✗_

 

 

The ground quakes as Jin jumps into the back of the van. They succeeded! Willaim helped him retrieve  _his_ Yuuri. He glances at the unconscious man, his raven black hair laying sideways. He pays close attention to everything again. His slow breathing, his pale skin, the bruises on his face. Jin wishes he could see his eyes, but Willaim was in charge of the plan and he had no say in whether or not he stays conscious or not. He had to wait. 

But he waited and waited. Ten minutes, twenty minutes, hours and hours. Until finally, they made a stop. The stop had been a simple stop for the bathroom before they continued on their way. They all got out and covered each other in the store to make sure no one had followed them. A quick bathroom break and a few snacks, but...

He got out the bathroom and no one was looking outside the store. No one was outside the store. He looked around, panicking, confused.   
  
"E-excuse me, but where did the-" 

"They left." The clerk answers straight up.  ** _They what?!_**

He tried looking around again, walked away from the store to see if he could glimpse the van. They were gone... they took Yuuri. He tried calling Willaim, but the bastard's phone went straight to voicemail. 

Now he was crying. He was nearly in the middle of nowhere and they abandoned him, took Yuuri, and the truth dawning on him. Willaim didn't need a reason to break Yuuri, and if he did... it was for his own pleasure. 

_He was... set up._

And he fucking fell for it so easily, trying to get over Jeannie and trying to get over his past. How was he so careless? How was he so easily captivated and unopen to the likelihood of this whole thing being a setup?! All the free passes, everything he was given to by some damn stranger, he wasn't one bit skeptical about?! 

And now he was crying. He hated this feeling. Hated it more than he hated losing his beloved. Every time Jeannie would cry, he'd feel too bad not to feed her as a punishment, to continue torching her, to continue hitting her, to continue _loving_  her. 

She cried too much.

She died  _too_ easily. 

He won't make any of these mistakes again. Pulling out his phone, he scrolled through a few contacts before ordering a taxi. It would take a while to arrive, but what could he do? 


	18. The Missing

Eyes slowly open. His whole body aches for some odd reason,  _'since when did my bed get so uncomfortable?'_ He asks himself unaware as to whether or not he had said it out loud or not. The teen blinks himself awake a couple times and sits up, and holy shit it's  _freezing!_ The concrete is almost as cold as ice- concrete.

The blond immediately begins taking in his surroundings, the events of the previous day (if he was even knocked out that long) rushing into his mind all at once. Yuuri was no longer with him, Viktor was shot, they were kidnapped. Fuck, Viktor was  _SHOT!_  In a panic, Yurio runs across the small room and tries to open the oddly large wooden door. The large door clashes with the size of the room and its own handle, which also seems to be a small knob. 

 _'Please open...'_ His panicked mind says as he leans back with all his weight.   
  
 Not even a minute passes and he feels his fingers cramping, being squished against the knob. Not even stopping to think,  
  
  **('what will you do once you open it?')  
**  
 the terrified teen groans in rage and the handle pops off—  _It p-popped off?!-_ — He thinks in surprise and slight excitement, but immediately regrets it when he sends himself flying back, being off balanced, the back of his head and his back hit the concrete as a few wooden scraps and nails also hit the ground. It's then he sees what he's wearing. Completely...completely different from what he was wearing after the banquet. The hospital-like grey gown was nothing like his simple casual pants and jeans he went to the hotel with. He bites his lip and gets to his knees to look at the nails and wooden sharps on the ground. He grabs the nail, it's freezing against his palm, it's size small enough to be hidden if he carefully balled his fists around it.  _"What the fuck—?"_ Someone on the other side of the door groans in frustration. The man on the other side clicks his tongue, "You're a damn idiot Yurio. That's one of the things an absolutely hate about you. Why would you break the handle on a perfectly good door when  _you're_  the hostage here? Defenseless dumbass..." His voice trails off as footsteps walk away from his cell door. Yurio goes over every last thing he said to him. That man was the first one to talk to him since he got here, and he wasn't going to let obvious clues make him naive to why, how, and when he was kidnapped.   
 _  
You're the hostage here._

The teen takes a quick note on the word 'hostage.' He was a hostage, so were he and Yuuri kidnapped for money? They were famous and it wouldn't seem too unusual there were people who wanted them to become rich. Even if they were caught, they'd be caught as the One(s) Who Kidnapped the Famous Yuris. Speaking of them both, Yuuri...  
  
The reason they went to the stupid ass hotel in the first place was for Yuuri. Yuuri was raped, possibly tortured before this. These could very well be the same people, and if this all wasn't for the money... if there was possibly someone who just want them for other things that Yurio himself didn't know what; they were less likely to get out of this ordeal alive. In that case... It would be better to just accept death, or do it...yourself? Would it actually though? He glances downward at the sharp silver nail. Maybe— maybe he could end everything now—   
  
His cell door is kicked open and the blonde scrambles away from the door, just in time to keep it from smashing onto his back, just in time to see someone. A kid with blonde hair and blue eyes enters. A kid?!   
  
Yurio is just about to ask if he'd come to rescue him when the teen all to suddenly speed walks over to him and grabs the collar of his gown. Throwing his other hand on the teens head, fastening his weight on his stomach. Yurio gasps at this, realization slowly, ever so slowly sinking in.   
  
"You just broke a really expensive door. You and everyone who supports you will soon have no money left, so how are you going to pay for it, Yuri?"   
  
The realization fulling sinks in,   
  
Yuri starts shaking under the red-eyed gaze of the other boy's. Possibly, the ringleader. The guy controlling everyone, Yuuri's possible rapist, the kidnappers, that man he spoke to just a few seconds ago. The  _man_ he just spoke to, the  _rapist,_ and the fucking _kidnappers!_ All controlled by a child? 


	19. Chapter 19

Objects mash together and mix into a colourful blur, Viktor, simply being only stuck inside his own mind to care much about the world. His blue eyes scan above him, the night sky only disturbs him more. The only reminder of his husband's case was the constant buzzing of the phone in his right pocket. He sighs, something he'd been desperately trying to avoid for years, building up in his chest. His heart's painfully pounding against his chest again. This feeling was completely different from all those years ago. It hurt like no other pain he ever felt before, and substantiality, all he wanted was to go home and sulk for a while. Not that he'd dream of stopping at this point. 

"So, I know you're technically the only cop I know and all..." Viktor started, getting the attention of the man in the driver seat, "But don't most, if not all, cops end up investigating something close to kidnap? Wouldn't there be better cops up for the job?..." Jin shifts in his seat, then catching a glimpse of the man through the mirror above him. The man seemed fatigued, and likely didn't care about his answer, but if Jin said something wrong, if he said something remotely suspicious, then it could screw up his plans. "T-That's... This would be a completely different case, correct? Actually, it's ironic how your husband was kidnapped sometime after I agreed to help you out with anything of this nature. It's fine if you don't trust me entirely yet, I can understand you not wanting to. Though, it would be appreciated if you gave me a little faith. I'm going to try my hardest on your husband's case." He tries to put easily. Despite his words being so simple, it throws everything on the line right now. If Jin didn't make it simple, nor did he occasionally put his plans at risk in order to do anything and everything to keep fooling this man, then his work would be for not. He might even call actual cops to help him if he didn't throw in something sappy and ingenuous either! 

Viktor lifts his hand from on his face. His elbow dropping from the window seal into his lap. Jin bites his lip at the action, occasionally moving his attention from the road to Viktor's eyes as all his boredom is seemingly flying away. Briefly, his hand grazes the door handle. They stop at a red light, and all his focus is now on the man in the backseat. The red illuminating from outside to his eyes give them a certain glow, his glare then grew dangerous. And as if Viktor had a revelation, he reached for the handle again. Slowly grasping his hand around it. Alarms rang in his head, unknowing to him of how dangerous repeating this action was for him, Viktor did it anyway. The handle was pulled, but it didn't open how he thought it might. Despite the door being unlocked and the knob being pulled hard enough for it to pop open. His head slowly turning to the driver seat as Viktor began opening his mouth. The question on his tongue aching to be delivered. "Hey, Jin—" 

"We're here." 

"Wha—?" Viktor turned his attention to the window, revealing the outside world. The blurring colour's had stopped, but the dark mysterious sky above their heads held it's place.  

-

Their footsteps echoed through the halls. A memory flashing through his head. Viktor stood still for a moment, dark halls with Yurio standing in front of him. It was only for a second, maybe even less, but Viktor saw it clearly nonetheless. The sound of a voice being the only thing pulling him out of the memory and back to reality, "So, this is the hotel, right?" The blue-haired man asks casually as he runs his hand on the wall. Viktor nods his head slowly. Then Yurio really did come with him to find Yuuri that night. Viktor remembers them being at dinner then going to the hotel. Most likely to find Yuuri, but if that was the case then why were all the halls dark when they entered? "All the power was out when I went to go look for Yuuri... I can't remember anything from after that, most of the stuff I did including the skate are mainly blurs..." Jin nods as well as they continue down the hall and writes it down. Though, he already knew this. 

 _"Blood," Yurio says looking down at the abandoned blue frames. Yuuri's blood! It's most likely_ — 

Viktor stops in his tracks. A new memory appears in his mind and he's then taking a few steps back. He almost wishes he never remembered it, wishes he never remembered the fact that they found blood near that staircase. 

Blue eyes widen at the familiar area. 

"This wa—"

"Follow m— !" 

Viktor clutches his head in agony, bites his lip in pain. Old memories, new memories, disturbing memories of the night flood into his mind. Just as he feels that it was enough, footsteps echo louder through the vacant hallway. 

_"I... It's my fault he showed up late. I insulted him to the point of tears, and I was..."_

_どうして？_

_"Is that...blood?"_

_"N-no!..."_

_"VIKTOR!!"_

When Viktor began tasting blood, he released his aching lip from between his teeth.  _Viktor!_ He had no time for it. He had no time for anything aside from finding the office. The one Yuuri was—

 _"So how does it fucking feel, Viktor?" The platinum-haired man glared at him. If only looks could kill..._  
"Terrible..." He stated blatantly, barely audible.   
"What?! I can't fucking hear you!"   
Viktor's eye twitched, "terrible!" he repeated louder hoping someone would come by and hear what was going on in the room. "Really? Wow." The man laughed re-aiming the gun. 

That's... 

In boldened letters...the door he was looking for comes to view, his eyes widening. 

Yuuri was gone.

He really was gone,  _"Viktor! What happened?!"_ He's met with dark eyes. He hates them. He really hates them now.   
  
  
  
  
He didn't care anymore. Hot tears run down his face, wet eyes staring directly at dark, reminding him of the darkened sky he was disturbed by just a few hours ago. How could he?   
  
  — _my best friend is fucking missing. If I continue you both probably won't believe me, so I need to tell you what actually happened, giving you less than a summary, don't I? He w- was uhm raped and that's why you saw all the... hickeys... I'm assuming neither of you has seen him?"_  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"Jin. Were you here that night?" 


	20. Chapter 20

Jin stares at the crying man, disbelief written all over his face. Was it impossible to keep him from finding out what happened that night after bringing him here? He put everything on the line for Viktor to be satisfied enough so they could keep moving forward, and yet, here he is at a loss for words. Viktor's face scrunches into a look of betrayal and that's when he's forced to look away. The pale floor beneath them would have to suffice. "Y- you think...it was me sir?" He tries, pitiful it was, but he had no choice anymore. He hadn't done this in years, so many years he forced it down, but he had no choice. Tears fell from his midnight eyes as the floor blurred underneath him. He was slowly losing everything, he couldn't lose anything anymore... his mind was the first. 

"I said I'd try my hardest..." He says a bit louder as his hair falls over his eyes. The displeasing expression on Viktor's face changed into one of guilt. But he didn't feel all that guilty in the slightest. "Prove it to me then." Jin snaps his head up suddenly. "Huh—?" 

"Prove to me that you can find Yuuri. Prove to me you're not just the guy who kidnapped him and is now toying with me. I have no proof that you're even the same guy that was here, but I know damn well that you sound a lot like him." Jin bites his lip. This wasn't the response he was expecting whatsoever. In fact, he was certain that Viktor would have switched immediately knowing that he was his husband's potential kidnapper. Was he an idiot, dense, crazy?! "What do you want me to do to earn your trust?..." Viktor steps forward, though Jin's eyes never leave the floor. He then flinches a little too much at a hand being pressed against his shoulder. "Just call me when you have something." 

_Why?_

Viktor walks away and Jin's left to watch his back as he descends down the hall. "You're fucking crazy..." Jin mutters to himself hysterically. Half of his mind expected a punch but instead was told to hold a promise.

.

Jin spreads the sheets of paper along the table. Tries to recall any hints of where that kid could've taken Yuuri. Of course, it was somewhere out of the country, and what he heard; somewhere in America. The problem with that was, however, was he never had gone to America before! And asking Viktor for advice was completely out of the question in case he'd been there. Jin was completely alone with no hints or clues he could recall let alone find. He briefly remembers asking Willaim for the location, but after writing it down he'd lost it soon after...

Jin lowers his head as he pulls on the blue locks. What a stupid way. If he didn't lose or forget where he wrote it down; he wouldn't even need Viktor's help. Permission, sure! He was planning on having both Yuuri and Viktor wrapped around his finger. But now all he could feel was guilt for his actions. Jin pulls the door open, locking it behind him. He lost any momentum he gained from Yuuri's case. The only thing that happened was the fact Viktor knew what he was, or had some idea. He will find him. One way or another, he'd find the location.

He turns into an alleyway, a small store should be around the corner. He picks up his pace as he steps out the alleyway and into the store. Jin ends up finding the things he needs and pulls the credit card William gave him from out his right pocket. Dumbfounded as to why it still worked, Jin simply walks back out the store, placing the credit card and a small pocket knife he purchased into his left pocket.

"Yu-Jin." He hears his name being called from behind. Great.   
The black-haired man was far from stupid. Maybe he lost his mind, and maybe he was going to end up losing his life, but he never lost his intelligence. He didn't even have to turn around to know the guy behind him was bad news. "H-hey! Wait!" Jin takes off running without looking back. He didn't have time for this. A couple more steps until he's out the alley when he feels himself being tripped. His head smacks against concrete, the oily coin smell oozing from his lip. Someone was pulling him further into the alley. Someone in front of him must have waited until he was nearly out to smash his hope and pull him back.

Jin curses under his breath as he sees more men approach. There were three of them, one holding his legs, the other straddling him as the last one kept watch. At least... If Jin were in a group, that's the kind of formation he would've kept. Jin didn't even need to look at the guys to tell they knew what they were doing. If they didn't, all three of them would have been chasing him from behind. If they didn't, their formation here would be completely amateur. All three guys would have been staring at him.

"Got him!..."

"You sure about this?"

"Of course, this guy's no professional. Plus, William said he was useless anyway. I can't go another second without getting laid after spending months preparing the shitty kidna— "

It feels warm. Jin forgot how blood felt, but it's so warm. The knife digs deeper into the man's stomach, and he can tell the man on top of him was panicking. Having a knife inside your abdomen should be scary, so these guys have no experience if they were the one in this kind of situation. In other words, they'd react like any normal person would.

He feels the grip on his legs loosen a bit and Jin takes the time to push his legs inward and kick the man above him in the stomach.

 _It was all William's fault_.

"S-someone's coming—!  " Jin pushes the knife into his neck from behind him before he finishes his sentence. The last thing he sees is the man that was holding his legs clutching his stomach on the floor. He will bleed out soon, maybe before the person entering the alley sees him. His hands scan over the bodies quickly as he grabs whatever was in their pockets and throws it in the bag with his other purchased items.

"I may be useless to William now, but as if I'd get raped in some crummy fucking alley." He mutters while running in the opposite direction.


	21. Chapter 21

It was cold, freezing. This must've been the coldest his hands ever felt. He presses them together and blew hot air, hoping to transfer some warmth. The action proved to be useless as a breeze sweeps through his darkish blue locks again. Jin simply sighs, shoving his frozen hands deep into his pockets. Jin was freezing... but not just because it was cold outside. Not just because of the air that bit at his sensitive skin every "two seconds." He was telling himself lies, over and over again— and yet, he didn't understand why. Why was he scared of the truth? He knew things like this happened, HE did it to Yuuri for fuck sake! But... being on the opposite end was nothing more than frightening.  _Nothing even happened. I killed them...so why?..._ Jin's frown deepens. He never felt this way... Never.

The door clicks as he steps into the old run-down apartment room. Black lifeless eyes scan around the area. It was cold in here as well, but warmer than being out there. This feeling made his heart sink into the pit of his stomach, he couldn't tell where the pain was exactly. He couldn't tell what was happening to him. His hand reaches absentmindedly into his pockets again, digging out all the loot he received from the guys he dealt with. Something was wrong with him. Something was truly wrong with him. A shaky hand is brought to his mouth. _This is sadness,_  Jin then confirms. He recognized the feeling, he saw his past lover do something like this before. She always did, over and over and over aga—  Warm tears trailed down his face. Really...he hadn't cried in who knew how long. Something was  _unmistakably_ wrong with him!

_Though..._

Were these feelings what he sprung onto everyone? Did Yuuri feel like this when—...Or was it different?

No thinking about that now. Right now he had to... what did he have to do? He swore to himself he'd get Yuuri back, right? Jin's legs buckle underneath him, the floor seeming more welcoming. It helped soothe the sinking feeling in his chest. He balled in on himself, one hand clutching his stomach and the other near his chest. Still being unable to pinpoint the location of pain. 

For a while, he stayed like that. His body felt so numb. As if he wanted to sleep, but if he were to go to bed, he'd likely just lay there. Disgusting thoughts spread over like a virus in his mind, his heart beating against his chest painfully.  _What a terrible feeling._

A trembling hand dug through the stuff he pulled out, his eyes widen. It was nothing less than disbelief. It was unbelievable. But with this, with this? He had a lead. His hands shook, the paper crumbling between his palms. He may sound a little crazy—   
  
  
  
  
But he was...  
  
  
  


_Ah, that's right._

He regrets his actions. 

No, not because he felt all that bad.

_Lair._

No, not because he was crazy. 

_Liar._

It definitely wasn't  _any_ those— it could not be any of those! 

_Lair_. 

Jin was confused?...  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


But one thing was still clear. There was one thing he must do before he begins completely realizing his mistakes.

_I'll save you, Yuuri._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	22. Chapter 22

Something unfamiliar bubbles inside his chest. It was done. The corners of his lips shift up.  _Oh, and how easy it was. How simple it was._

_I giggle to myself; the same feeling coming back to me. The one I was "begging" to feel again. I don't like it._

_But I can't live without it._

_**How inane such an objective was.** _

_The dull pain begins taking over completely._

_I hate this feeling, I hate it so much._

_My eyes sting. They hurt becomes immense, I can feel my mouth move on its own, that odd feeling I've tried to push down before; it eats me alive. I scream, no noise comes out._

_It hurts..._

_**"You couldn't control yourself, could you?"** _

_I couldn't, I really tried. Once again, I have no idea what it's planning. I have no idea what harm it has caused yet. My sight is blurry, my eyes feel sticky. Only thoughts of mine are the pain. "G-go_ —"

_**"No thanks...besides."** _

_I can't feel my hands, I can't feel anything. It's only so painful._  
  
Kill me. 

_**"I've already started."** _


	23. I'm Missing

How long has it been? Sweat trickles down from the side of his face, he can feel his hair thick of the stuff.   
  
He was laying on his left side, vision still blinded, hands still bound. They felt numb now. Maybe his blood stopped circulating beyond his wrists.

Yuuri could no longer tell up from down, everything was dark and all he could do was endure it. There was no escape, he wasn't even sure if there was anyone watching him.  His body starts trembling. His nose was stuffed, his body sore, his throat felt so, so dry. The world began spinning again. Ever since Minami was taken out of the room, no one has come back. The only thing Yuuri was able to tell, was it's been  _days_. He chuckles lightly, tears staining the cloth over his eyes again.  _"D...ays."_ He mumbles through the cloth tied loosely around his mouth. It was the first thing he's said in a while... he wishes he had kept his mouth  _shut._ The small male can feel how dry his mouth actually was. How little he'd eaten, how his pant leg was drenched in something he tried so hard to keep from doing. He'd never been this vulnerable before. 

**_Not even with Jin?_ **

He begins trying to hold back _, don't cry._  
Yuuri needed to save whatever he could in case someone did happen to come back. He couldn't die yet, not when he was with Viktor. Not when Viktor would never forgive himself for his death. Not when Yuuri had that weight on him. He couldn't let Viktor suffer because he was weak...again.

**_If he was even alive._ **

Dammit...  _dammit!..._

Tears end up escaping anyway. All he'd been doing was crying at this point. The slow feeling of his sanity slipping eats at his mind. Being able to tell how his life was also slowly approaching its end.  
  
 Not...yet. I can't die yet. 

__'I've got to get stronger if I want to skate on the same ice as Viktor one day.'_ _ __'I've always ignored you because I didn't want you to see my shortcomings.'_ _ __'Now I know what love is and I'm stronger for it!'_ _

His stomach churns painfully for the thousandth time today. "Yeah right... How am I supposed to get stronger? How am I supposed to skate- how am I supposed to do anything when—" His throat dries up completely and he's forced to close his mouth.  _This situation has nothing to do with skating. I'm just weak because I'm weak. All I've done was sit here for days praying anyone would help me._ _A_ _S if mumbling through a cloth I can't untie is gonna get me anywhere right now._

Yuuri hiccups painfully.  _I'm sorry Viktor... but at this point, I'd rather actually just_ —

"Seems as though you think you've been forgotten." The raven head freezes. The voice was loud, it snapped him into reality. From...Behind? How long...

"...He's doing it on purpose you know." He can hear footsteps, small, pattering slowly against the concrete. "C'mon, I've gotten get you cleaned up now... I- I don't know what'll happen next though." That...voice. 

"Y...yur...Yurio—?" Yuuri coughs painfully, his chest lagging with each time he breathes out again. His body's lifted off the floor until he's sitting up. The sound of chains moving around echoes off the walls. His arms fall lifelessly to his sides. "Ca—" 

"Listen." The teen starts, sitting up the Japanese male and then moving to his face to untie the cloth over his eyes and mouth. "I know. I'm sorry, there's nothing I can even... There are kinda a lot of people here, so don't ask me why I haven't escaped yet. And... I was told to help you 'get ready'... so... so let's just get ready, okay? There's nothing to discuss, there's nothing I can say, but... But I'm sorry." The small teen begins, and yet, Yuuri still had no idea what he was talking about.

"I accused you, if I hadn't, you would've been late to the dinner party thing, you wouldn't have felt as bad as you did, and maybe this would have still happened, but if I could have delayed it just a tiny bit, make something change so it wasn't as bad as it is now; I wouldn't have said what I did. Even if I couldn't change anything, even if I can't change the fact you were suffering now, even if they kill us after all this; I am so sorry, Katsuki Yuuri." 

The rags and chains fall to the floor and Yuuri turns towards the sad teen. All Yurio can feel is guilt as he stares back. The bloodshot eyes, his soaked face, and his slimy wet hair. How could they let him get like this? Purposely get like this? "Yuuri..." Yurio feels his eyes water and he quickly looks away, "L...Let's go." 

Lifting the taller male over his shoulder, they both walk towards the exit. Yuuri looks around in what he was living in for the past...days. It was a small room, had a small wooden bed and coffee table, which threw off the point of the room completely, as he was forced to stay on the floor and couldn't see why there was a coffee table— or even a bed. He's guided into a hallway, the walls and floor all being a solid white with a painting and small table underneath it. No windows, no other decoration. Yurio pulls out a small flashlight from his pocket. Everything being nearly completely dark, would've been darker if Yuuri wasn't used to the dark already. He's then reminded of the time spent in the room and shakes his head silently in attempt to clear his mind. He's fine now.

"Okay... we both have to change into these suits." They approach a wooden white door, a small black stool to it's right with a couple black suits. Yuuri nods his head in silence. He just wanted the sticky wet clothes off his back. "Don't ask why though, they've just..." Yurio trails off instantly. Was it okay to think, 'something was bothering him?' Clearly,  _everything_  about their situation was bothering both of them. 

.

They both exit out the bathroom in suits, "Despite our situation, Yurio... I feel one hundred times better actually." Yuuri lets off a small smile. He was still starving, but what he had now was good enough. 

"That's because you drank the water in the...It's whatever." Yurio's cheeks illuminate a bit a red. "You're hungry, right?... They don't give us many options, so they told me to feed you uh... just follow me." Yurio grabs one of Yuuri's wrists. Thier shoes echo off the walls as he walks towards an unknown destination. 

 _This is stupid. They really expect us to behave like their pets. I've been treated fine, but this whole time Yuuri was suffering. This whole time he was close to dying and all I could do was sit still and act as that fucking kid told me to act._ "...Tsk."

Yuuri feels the hand on his wrist tighten. 

Despite how he may seem; Yurio was still a kid. No teen should ever have to go through this... 

His eyes wander towards their hands. I'll do my best to protect you, Yuri. He slides his arm from inside of Yuri's grip and locks their hands together. "We're together now, and I'm fine. So stop worrying so much. No matter what you do here Yuri, I'll forgive you." 

For the rest of the way, Yurio stays looking forward, not once glancing back. He felt better. How—why is it always the other way around?

.

"Here..." Yurio pulls back a chair then gesturing for his friend to take a seat. As they both settle at the long wooden table, both their chest tightening in a constant forming anxiety. The room was much lighter than the hallways due to the lighting around the room. He was only instructed to bring Yuuri here after feeding him. There was nothing more to it, and that scared him. What if there actually was a way out? What if not putting in the effort to look around was a mistake? The same questions ate at his mind, they have been this whole time. Yuri moves his mouth into a straight-line. Guilt, anger, fear; they all merge into the silence as he sweatdrops. 

"...Check." 

"Okay, thank youu!~ What about Zilen? Is he ready yet?"

"Yes."

They both hear several sets of footsteps as people gather into the room. A teen with short poofy brown hair, a man with short black hair, and a teen with his blond hair pushed back messily. 

The anxious poofy brown-headed teen pulls out a seat for the kid with disordered blond hair. "Thank you." He says simply, not even acknowledging the two others in the room. Yurio's hands ball up around his pant leg. Both Yuri's have one thing on their mind then. Apart from the lack of acknowledgment they were being given, that's...

_Willaim._

 "Make sure it's not to be seen." Willaim's lips quirk up into an innocent smile, "I wanna chat with my pets first! Then you can come back once everything is secure... Got. It?" 

"Y-yes!" 

Willaim continues smiling as he watches the backs of the two males leaving. 

An increasingly faster forming anxiety, it was suffocating. Yuuri's throat dries up completely again. He had a small meal earlier, but imagining how dry his throat was from before made his anxiety all the worse. His blood goes cold, he can no longer breathe properly, his body trembles in fear.

"Now..."

William speaks up. And finally, both their heads bursting with newly forming questions, Willaim turns his attention to them. First Yurio, then his eyes stick onto Yuuri.

The man freezes, the immediate stillness nearly impossible if Yuuri hadn't been holding his breath ever since he entered the room. "I guess it's time to start, yeah?"

_He's reminded of the bar._

_Why Minami was likely kidnapped._  
  
 _It was his fau_ —

"Let's play a game."


	24. Chapter 24

Now moving on the most recent report on the case, being the video everyone seems to continuously be talking about.

**" あなたは両方を救えますか？ "**

"The video has been passed along numerous times,  _destroying_ many common social media site with the continuous spam from not just fans, but bots as well. Officials from sites such as Twitter, Instagram, and countless others have already tried to take it down, however, multiple different accounts have reposted the video along with different accounts reposting it onto social media ... What do you think of all this coming from— "

.

The door slams against the wall, "Viktor!!" Jin breathes out, leaning on the doorknob for support.

"What is it, Jin?" Viktor puts down the cup of cheap coffee he'd been deciding to stick with rather than food.

"T... There's trouble," The man's shoes click onto the wooden floor as he rushes over to the Russian's side. "Look! The media's been going fucking crazy over this."

Placing down his phone, Viktor looks up at Jin confusingly.

The screen lights up the darkened room, a video on ... Yo!Tube? "Jin, I don't have time for— " Viktor then gazes at the title of the video. Jin unpauses it silently, simply staring at the screen with eyes of worry. "Viktor ... Just watch."

.

"Hey new people, old people, present people! I hope you've all been doing great!"

The video begins with a masked man. His hair sticks out from the top, blonde, straight hair; messily surrounds the top and sides of a black and white penguin mask. It's green brightly lighten eyes light up it's surroundings as everything around him was pitch dark.

"I won't show my face, not yet anyway. But I will show ..." The masked man steps back, a light is turned on inside of the room by someone; then showing two figures behind the camera. "These two."

He whips off the bags that were placed ontop the heads of his two victims. Viktor feels rage lather in his chest. The masked man's identity, along with the two people he'd been searching for, for days become clear.

_William, Yuuri, and Yurio._

**Oops, Something Went Wrong !**

The words pop up over the video as it freezes. "Wh- what?! That was— "

"I think the video we were watching was taken down just now, I'll search for another one ..." Jin explains quickly as he clicks off the video and scrolls down the page. "If ... If you still wanna see it."

Viktor chews his bottom lip and stares at the glowing screen, "What kind of question is that? Of course, I want to finish it. I- it can give us clues as to where he was taken. I already know you might not even be a real policeman, so doing this ourselves without anything to go on really was hard enough ..."

They both sit in silence as Jin nods his head, "I've been ... doing some digging I guess and I ended up getting a card. It only gives me a location and a number."

The Russian's head slides into his hand, "why didn't you say anything earlier?!" He yells through his palm.

"Ah ... haha, that was because the guys who I got it from ... I mean I wasn't really doing digging at the time I got it, but I ... rather ..."

"Spit it out already."

"I just beat up some guys who were after me is all. Maybe we'll find out more once we watch the video— oh see, here's another link." Jin smiles sadly as he taps on the same video with a different publisher.

.

"Now, you may know these people as "Katsuki Yuuri and, Yurio Plisetsky! But for me ... I think of these two as my special guest!"

The masked man steps back and grabs a fist full of Yuuri's black hair. Yuuri's face was dampened with sweat and there were dark bags under his eyes. Viktor takes notes silently as he stares blankly at the too well-known faces he'd been dreaming about seeing again.

"Isn't that right, Yuuri? I mean, this is your show after all!" Yuuri's teeth become visible as he clenches them together through whatever pain he was feeling. With the rest of the room silent, the obviousness of Willaim's furious anger toned voice sends cold sweat down Viktor's neck.

"Ah, so you're ignoring me? This, this is funny ..." Willaim speaks as he moves away from the camera's point of view. "I swear we ... haha. We discussed this all before filming." Something hard moves against the room floor. It echoes off the walls and Viktor's heartbeat seemingly stops. The camera zooms in so nothing from anyone's waste or below could be seen. 

It all happened too fast, a gunshot rings off then drops to the floor. Willaim brings up the bat in his hands and swings it somewhere out of the camera's range.

Yuuri's face distorts into agony as his eyes water. Viktor unconsciously covers his mouth as Yuuri screams in pain through his gag in pain.

.

_Am I going to die this way? Not being able to see my mother ... my family, the ring, Viktor, ever again?_

Yuuri continues crying silently through his gag after a while. Willaim quickly grabs hold of Yuuri's face, pulling down the gag and covering his mouth. ' _Can't ... breathe,'_  Is what he wanted to say, how was he to say it through tears, moreover, fear, anxiety, pain, the hand covering his mouth? His words come out as strange muffled cries as Willaim's hand travels down his leg to the place where he'd just shot and hit him with the bat earlier. Yuuri's face distorts again as he prays for him not to touch his wound, but all his prayers are inevitably cast aside as Yuuri screams through the hand covering his mouth. His eyes clenched shut as he tries his best to faint from the pain.

Yuuri hangs lazily from the pole above both Yurio and him as he tries to bring all his weight to the opposite foot.

"See? We talked about this, don't disobey my orders. Oh! And, don't worry about infections or anything, don't want you dying on me. Ahem ...."

Willaim turns towards the camera with a joyous smile. "Anyway, this video isn't to show off. So please don't turn off your camera's just yet and go to sobbing in 'all the misery that such a 'disgusting' man has your favorite idol!' Why? That's because I'll be  _selling_ these two!"

Unlike Yuuri, Yurio's mouth wasn't gagged and he wasn't tied down the same as Yuuri was. His hands had a simple tie in front of his hands, so simple that he would be able to untie them easily with a little work. That being said ... if he were to do that, he'd be left defenseless in front of so many dangerous people. He'd never know ... he'd never know if he didn't try, right? Was that the right thing to do in this situation?! If they were to be sold ... how the hell were they supposed to escape. What if this was the only opportunity he would ever have before things got worse.

_Things could get worse._

_Could things get worse?_

Willaim continues talking merrily to his audience as though they were all right in front of him, his hand occasionally gesturing to the two behind him.

Yurio's heartbeat rises by the tenfold as he does everything at once.

His ropes untie and he quickly grabs Willaim by his arm, then headbutting him with everything he had, careful not to make himself faint.  _This was it, if I fail, then that's it. I can't sit here and do nothing if this was our only chance._ He hears William's body fall to the floor, and that was all that mattered.

His vision becomes blurry, but he chooses to ignore it as he moves over to Yuuri's binds.

.

_Smiling ... They all were._

Yuuri chooses to ignore the situation a bit. He couldn't grasp it yet. Multiple people, including the cameramen around them, were smiling. No one said a word about what'd just happened to the man in charge. No one even bothered being surprised.

_It was too easy._

"Yuri ..." Yuuri says quietly as he attempts to back up from the teen's grasp.

His eyes widen at the sight of the teen's appearance. Yurio was  _terrified_. So much so that he hadn't even taken off the gag from around his neck, he hadn't even bothered telling him what he was doing, hoping Yuuri would just catch on.

"Tsk ... Guess I couldn't expect you to realize and obey." Yurio's hands shake violently as his fingers pause on Yuuri's ropes above his head.

William slowly drops the penguin mask that had been crushed by Yurio. "Don't worry dear audience ..." Willaim speaks silently as he silently strides over to the duo. "With a little discipline, these two can be wonderful, I promise." Yurio squeaks silently, not even bothering to turn around as William's hand dig harshly into Yurio's scalp.  Yuuri quickly grasps the seriousness of the situation.

"WAIT!"

Yuuri yells furiously.

Willaim's movements pause, "What is it, Yuuri?" He asks simply awaiting an answer.

"Whatever punishment you're going to give Yurio, give it to me!"

.

William's smirk darkens. "Well ... why didn't you just say so?" Yurio's body falls to the floor as William kicks him aside.

"Welp, that's the end for now dear audience! Next time you see Yuuri, I swear on Yuuri's own life that at least he'll be loyal next time. But as for Yurio, click the link at the bottom for more information!"

.

The screen turns black.

Viktor leans back in his chair, simply staring up at the ceiling for a while in a daze. 


	25. Chapter 25

_Mila and Georgi stare at the screen in dismay._

_Yakov keeps quiet on the other side of the rink. Of course, he'd seen it last night._

_"Yuuri ..." Phichit says lowly, tears gathering at the corner of his eyes._

_Takeshi curses, tears falling down his face. Yuuko had run to the bathroom, making up some excuse as if she even needed one._

_Axel, Lutz, and Loops stare at the two in confusion. What's going on? Did we miss something? Did the police find Yuuri yet?! They were never answered._

_Mirai keeps one of her hands placed on the side of her face, left in an absolute daze as Minako's hands shake angrily at her side, still in a state of shock._

_Hiroko Katsuki is hysterical. Sobbing where she stands after seeing the news on the television as Toshiya kneels down comforting her silently.  
_

"The world is in a state of shock," The finely dressed woman starts, now standing in front of a familiar apartment complex. "Does Viktor Nikiforov really care none for his husband? As of now, we have heard nothing from him, being assumed to still be in his apartment. He's made no contact with police, and as to our knowledge, ignores his fans, friends, and family." 

_Phichit+chu:  
@ v-nikiforov I dunno where to start. Viktor I'm so sorry this has happened to Yuuri, we all are. Your fans, your friends, your loved ones. I'm sure Yuuri wouldn't want you to suffer as you most likely are right now, please reply to me so I know you're okay at least. _

  
@Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov Yeah fucking right, like he'd reply on social media.

  @Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov Can't believe he'd ignore everything, this isn't what I'd expect of Vitkor Nikiforov

@Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov This is devastating,  I think we've all seen the video and it's amazing things like this could even happen in real life.   

  @Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov  wOah wtf Phichit? Ur commenting online? Is it really so bad that u had to retort to something like this or are u really doing this for your fans?

@Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov I'm glad you're such a good friend phichit. Low key still ship u guys even tho this shit happened www (im so sorry.)

@Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov  ^ wtf

_v-nikiforov:_

_@Phichit+chu Sorry for not answering my phone, I'm extremely grateful to have amazing people who care for Yuuri the way you guys do. I'm doing fine, but this will be one of my last times looking at social media for a while, I'm sorry._

@Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov HE FUCKING REPLIED?!?!

@Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov  何 NANI ?! 1/1/

Phichit+chu:

 @v-nikiforov  It's fine, it's fine, haha! I'm so glad you're okay for now. Take care of yourself, and if you need someone to talk to, I'm all ears Viktor!!  ⸜( ˙ ˘ ˙) 

  @Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov www  

  @Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov  I don't get why some people are laughing at this in the comment section, nothing is fucking funny you sick bastards. I've been reading some replies for hours and some of Yuuri's fans are so fucked up that it hurts. 

@Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov ^ 

@Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov  Maybe I can buy Yuuri lolol, sorry he's my best friend now Phichit

☆ComplementaryStar:  
  
@Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov  can we not just ALL TAKE THIS SHIT AS LIGHTLY AS POSSIBLE?!!? WHAT THE ACTUAL  _FUCKKKKK_

  @Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov  @ ☆ComplementaryStar  www, it's kinda funny wtf "can't we just buy them back?" I sort of agree to something like this if the cops dont figure this out first, but the end of the video literally said that he'd be more "loyal" as in ... Yuuri has to be properly tortured. yuuri has to be through HELL before we even get to see him again. Meaning giving up skating, dancing, living a normal life at all. He WILL NOT be the same ever again after just a couple weeks. I DONT THINK ANYONE IS TAKING THIS SHIT LIGHTLY U IDIOT NO ONE WANTS TO CAUSE PANIC AND NO ONE WANTS TO BE IN THIS SHITTY SITUATION AND IM CERTAIN,  _CERTAIN_ VITKTOR DOESNT EITHER!! _  
_

@Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov ^ take off caps lock noob

    @Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov  this is why I hate russia

@Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov tf does this have to do with russia ????

@Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov I like Russia. 

@Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov okay these replies are dumb and shitty scary.

@Phichit+chu @v-nikiforov I think at the bottom of the videos that were being linked, if you connect to the dark web, using a TOR browser then ... you can literally  _buy_ yurio.  I have a feeling a lot of people who don't even know what proxy is, or even changing your wifi are gonna be arrested for this. 

\--------

[Read more]


	26. Chapter 26

William taps his shoe on the ground, placing his fist under his chin as if thinking of something important. Yuuri, being on a white hospital bed.   
  
No one had said anything for a while.

Yurio decided to stay quiet as well. The cold shameful quietness of being reminded of what he neglected to do in front of everyone.

"You wanna take his punishment?" William points to Yurio lazily with his thumb while seemingly glaring at Yuuri. He was definitely looking down on him, his face was one of disgust. But Yuuri had yet to figure out why he wouldn't just do what he wanted to. William had the tools, he's kidnapped them only to hear him out for things such as this? 

"Y-yes." He decides to reply sounding confident.  

Yurio feels a scowl growing on his face.  _Take my punishment they say?_ Nothing seemed to be sitting right with him.  For starters, he had no control of anything at all. All he could do was sit there and wait— wait for what?!   
  
Death likely.  
  


 It was disgusting, why was he so weak? Was he really this weak? This was no movie, it wasn't a game. It was real life, he wasn't some superhero. If he wanted to escape, it would come to his brains. Not placing your bets on escaping in front of your captors. 

His teeth click together profoundly as he watches Yuuri follow William out of the room. He had a cast on his leg. Was he going to receive a "punishment" in that state? 

.

.

\-----------------

It's been too long, Yuuri could be dead. Yurio could be dead. 

Jin paces back and forth, occasionally staring at the closed laptop and hundreds of stacked files on their desk.

 That card they had gotten a couple months ago seemed to be useless. They guys there were all big money pimps, rings on their chubby fingers, swaying their dicks out at people because their pants are full of "not just money," they say. This world was fucked, and in the end, they knew nothing. And to think they had nothing else to go on, even trying to decode the video William sent out had problems.

Why was he doing all of this again? He no longer had the urge to be with Yuuri. He never had the urge to be with Yurio. What is  _this_ lifestyle?

He had no family ...

If he gave up now, would Viktor call actual cops? 

If he wasn't fast enough and Yuuri ended up dying, would Viktor kick him out?

The media was going crazy over something earlier in the week, but he had no time to check what happened. Sorting through files, giving himself up to animals just to get information. Nothing was working, and whatever happened on the media might be a clue to getting Yuuri back. 

He then squeezes his eyes shut, he was beyond stressed at the moment. 

Jin opens his laptop. Clicking and scrolling on Viktor's Instagram acc ... account ...

Jin almost vomits from shock. A wave of something like grief washes over his features, his stress becoming vague as sadness takes over. 

It was just a photo, but it was a clue. 

If William didn't have the proper material for this, the photo could be traced. A location could be brought up and all he'd have to do is—

"I'm back." He hears a low voice as the door behind him slams shut.  _Shit! Viktor cannot see this right now._

Not after the months of  _nothing_ , not after the mornings where he'd often find Viktor's pillow damp from tears. The bags under both of their eyes wouldn't go away after this, but he was much, much worse. Sometimes he'd go off of instant ramen for a  _week_ , not eating until his stomach ached and he craved food. He drank every now and again, looking through new files, searching through William's "parents" files. As it turned out, they actually were his parents. But neither Jin nor Viktor bothered to ever talk to them after confronting them once about their missing troubled son. 

"Find anything?" His voice was raspy, he smelled of booze, but Jin never did mind it. 

He struggles to close out of the tabs, succeeding just as Viktor stood behind him. Then slowly shakes his head, trying to act as though he'd been working on something else. Viktor didn't reply, going over to the couch on the side of him and searching through files without saying a word. Jin hears a bottle pop open. His lips tuck under himself, and from the corner of his eye, he can see Viktor wiping something from his eyes. 

"Fuck, I really can't do this forever." Jin hears the most broken voice he'd heard from Viktor in a while. "I really ..." The papers crumble between his fingers, "Can't..."

"We'll find them. We'll find them both ..." Neither talk to each other after that, the sound of loose papers and clicking sounds in the room. 

If he gave up now, Jin would hate himself forever.

If Yuuri died now, Viktor would surely kill himself. 


	27. Missing

_Phichit+chu:_

_I have no words for how messed up everything is getting now that Yuuri's gone. It's getting painful to get out of bed anymore. Anyone still up? Does anyone still care? If Yuuri dies, I might as well too._

\----------------

"I ... I don't know." They were in a dark hospital. What time was it again? Who cares anymore? ...

The man paces around the room skeptically.

"You have to know something besides what you've told us during your experience. I mean, your friend never came back with you."

Yurio tucks his hands under his armpits, shivering cold— though the room seemed to be decently warm.

"I dunno, I dunno ... S-stop asking—I mean you c-can— never... Nevermind ..."

The officer stares at the kid in silence. He wouldn't stop shivering. Often studdering and looking around the room as if someone was going to jump him. "Are you cold, Yuri?" The man then sits down calmly, his legs spread a bit and Yuri couldn't help looking down.  _Was it a sign? Nonono, we're back in the_ _ **real**_ _world._

"No ..." He says dimly, trying his best to stop shivering.

"May I ask, why you keep shivering then? Was it something they had done to you that is making you this way?" Yurio stares at the man blankly. "I was," The officer leans forward, "locked in a freezer before all this."

"Why?"

"I was bad, again ..." Yurio states. It was hardly audible. "As in bad ... Do you mean you disobeyed your kidnappers? Is that why they locked you in the freezer?"

"Yes— well ... For a long time, I only remember trying to escape. And at some p-point ... I realized it was either with or without Yuuri beside me. Once, I tried to use my head for both of our sake, but when I'm caught ... It's n-n-normal...normally ...Yuuri ... It's always his fault, even when it's not!!" Yurio grabs at his blondish dirty hair, yanking it down so his forehead touches his knees.

"I knew if I stopped trying to escape, I would die. Someone would separate us, someone would get bored ... we would die! I tried over, and over and over, and each time I failed, I was locked in a freezer for hours while Yuuri followed William somewhere. For the first time, he had to go with him while he had a cast on his leg. I dunno what they did ..." The teen shivers harder than before, "I dunno why Yuuri is no longer Yuuri ..."

"Thank you so much for speaking up, Yuri. Your story is ... very brave. How did you escape?"

For the first time in the past 20 or so minutes they'd been sitting there, Yurio stopped shaking. The man sits up in confusion. It was odd, did something go wrong with his treatment?

"I abandoned Yuuri."

\-------

600k Reply + 2m Likes

_@Phichit+chu_   
_Positive .... Phichit??_

__@Phichit+chu_ _   
__But those pictures just gave us a bit of hope, didn't they?_ _

___@Phichit+chu_ _ _   
___Holy shit ..._ _ _

____@Phichit+chu_ _ _ _   
____Did you just say that you'll end your life?? You? The most lovable ... what the hell? ..._ _ _ _

_____@Phichit+chu_ _ _ _ _   
_____Can someone please tell me why we can't locate Yuuri or Yurio? They're on this earth, why can't we find them?! And didn't Yurio escape already? Wtf???_ _ _ _ _

______@Phichit+chu_ _ _ _ _ _   
______Don't kill yourself Phichit ..._ _ _ _ _ _

_______@Phichit+chu_ _ _ _ _ _ _   
_______And where's Viktor during all this shit?? Gone. Swear he never gave 2 shits about anyone but him and his dog. Selfish coward ..._ _ _ _ _ _ _

________@Phichit+chu_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _   
________^ The point is that we don't know, don't sit behind a fucking screen blaming Viktor because you cant see him uploading vlogs or some shit on how his day is going since his Yuuri was kidnapped. Fuck you dude._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________@Phichit+chu_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _   
_________^ That's not my point at all. He's literally nowhere! I get that we don't know shit, but if we've never seen him leave his apartment it could very well so mean that he_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _________**hasn't** _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _________. He could be dead, Yurio could be dead, Phichit wants to kill himself. Everything is shitty. And no, I don't blame Viktor for all this bs happening, but he could def try a little harder._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________@Phichit+chu_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _   
__________^ You definitely don't watch or pay attention to any of the new we find on them fucker_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

___________@Phichit+chu_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _   
___________Don't say such things Phichit ... I'm still awake ..._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _   
  


\------------

"Hold still, how many times do I g-gotta tell you?!"

I try my best to stay as still as possible. The object stuck in me, they often call a prop, stings the more I move around, but staying still was no option either

"I- I- I see why W-William likes you so much." The man talks quickly, I feel myself squirm under the vision through his camera lens. "Your b-body is so sexy ... The outfit shapes y-your b-b-body very nicely." The camera flashes a few more times, each time I give a startled blink. 

.

"Okay ... n-now I want you on your hands and knees facing the camera."

Yuuri listens calmly, getting out of his sitting position, he slowly turns himself facing the camera. As he moves, the object inside is pushed further. The small male accidentally lets a tear run down his cheek. 

"W-what the fuck are you doing?! I told you to stay still in  _that_ position, w-why are you crying?" The cameraman smacks his lips together in annoyance, furiously throwing his camera at the wall. Yuuri jumps at the sound of shattering glass. This man was crazy, just like everyone he's met aside from William. Where the hell would he find these people?

Loud footsteps resound across the ground. His chains echo as he then realizes the man was approaching him. 

Angrily grabbing Yuuri's neck and pushing him down, the man's face glooms over his with their noses centimeters apart. "Are you confused?! You stay FUCKING still!! It's not hard ... I-It's not hard at all ... What's w-with the face, huh?" His hands travel down, yanking Yuuri's ass and pushing the object that'd been deep enough for him to endure it, further into him. Yuuri chokes on the pain. "Is it this shit?! Too f-fucking bad, get on your hands and knees like a good little bitch and endure it, w-we haven't even been here for that long! ... Y-you're j-just being difficult!!" 

Yuuri squirms, heaving in pain. He tries to focus on anything other than how close he was to the stranger. 

So far ... no one has directly kissed him yet, and despite having everything taken from him, Yuuri was so grateful for that. Way too grateful. It was all he was going on ... Yurio had escaped a while ago, maybe a week. He had no purpose for living anymore, no purpose other than protecting him, right? He endured so Yurio could escape. He did ... he had. Now he didn't need this guy to take pictures of him to masturbate to later, he didn't need to be Williams pet. 

Something cold presses against his lips. Yuuri's already half-lidded eyes fill with tears. 

Now he had nothing else to hold on to.

No one else to care for.

What was it like with whoever it was he used to care for?

Who was that again? 

Doesn't matter, he lost another piece of him today. 

He lost everything ...

Suddenly, the motivation to hold onto his life flickers on and off; and continues to do so. Just like years ago, when he was depressed, when he was struggling. 

Life is black, white, and light blue. 

His body goes limp in the other man's arms. His hand slowly travels to Yuuri's crotch section. Despite losing all colour, Yuuri could never figure out why there were small hints of light blue everywhere.

...Well ...

Who cares?

He's lost everything.

\---------------

[Maid YuuriK.pdf] 

WillZ: Hope you all enjoy this gorgeous photo of my slave!~ How does a live video sound for you guys next? He can wear whatever you guys want, can't wait to finally touch him. I'll read comments while I get rid of the guy trying to fuck him right now. Damn camera guys are like dogs in heat sometimes.

5m Anonymous Comments(only post owner may see comment usernames):

— Damn, I'd be like a dog in heat too, I'd tap that all day wwwww.

— gAy !!

— Make him play as a piglet or a bunny. He'd look good yes?

— Did you just kill the camera guy who took this? Feels weird looking at it after knowing he just died.

— He looks so fucking sexy ... when he's all used up let me have him, please!!~

— I work as a professional camera artist. If you ever need help in any of your photography, I'd be happy to take pictures of that angel!! But, can masturbation be allowed? Contact me.

— nice toy willz!

— heard ur mom and dad never stopped lookin for ur ass, whats with the new comment, you havent posted here in 2 months. 

reply(s) 3:

Willz: I dont care abt my parents, whats up with you? Wanna come see him? dm me

— sure man

— wtf is he gonna dm u on? yelp??? 

[@Willz has decided to reveal the name of this user]   
6Timely66: wtf is all this shit? So ig this is where you sick fuckers like to get off to pictures of Yuuri?? Do you KNOW how many fucking fans are searching for shit like this? It was only natural for me to find it. 

reply(s) 5:

Willz: lol just like the picture of that damn Yurio that got out, I was hoping someone would find this one too, good luck going back to school tomorrow, Hashima Bodie. Or should I kill your wife instead?

— wwwww omfg u fucked up m9

— nice job willz

—kill the sick fans, for all we know this guy could ship viktuuri 

\- tYm 2 dO sUm hAxoRinG !~ ٩(^ᴗ^)۶


	28. ✴

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a little youtube link yoi edit -->
> 
> https://youtu.be/wL1PF-zW7mU
> 
> You don't have to watch it to understand the plot. It's here because I personally like it and I posted it originally on Wattpad.

"Y'know ... I kind of feel like ya broke too easily. I wanted to have some more fun, but you leave me with minimal choices here." William begins talking out of nowhere. To Yuuri, it was strange seeing him again. They hadn't been alone for a long time ... let alone talk to each other directly. Lucky for William, Yuuri felt he had something he needed to say. 

"C'mon, don't just stare down at the bed with your gloomy confused eyes now. You've been here long enough and I'm getting a little annoyed. Maybe Viktor did really give up on you, not that I'm surprised he couldn't find this place." The blond continues with mediocre small talk until he finishes positioning the camera. 

A red light flashes and the room's lights become slightly dimmed, "So ... I'll be live s-streaming this ... So don't be a butt and try to run off, okay?..." Yuuri slowly looks up at the teen. 

How'd this kid cause so much trouble in the first place? I'm a grown man ... and yet I instantly became helpless the moment he laid eyes on me— the moment he laid eyes on Yurio and the moment I was taken from ...  _"Viktor."_

"Viktor? Is that the first thing you decide to say after all you've been through?" William chuckles sarcastically as if Yuuri had pushed his last button. "That's ... That's hilarious! D-Did you know he hadn't said shit online but some half-assed apology to your best friend! He didn't even come out of his damn room for who knows how long. Most people think he's dead!" He gently places a finger under his eye due to tears of joy, "You stopped talking weeks ago and I've always been here with you. And yet ... ha, okay." 

✞ _✴I'm completely lost now. Being here without the slightest sign of hope made me this way. I knew I was never enough, I knew I couldn't possibly be enough for Viktor Nikiforov. But, this ... this was different. This wasn't what I wanted at all. I wanted to be happy, but I guess I was asking too much. What was it I wanted most? Why was I fighting, what's the point in being alive if I end up with nothing to prove I was. One silver metal and I'll be forgotten forever, I ... I couldn't even get gold. I couldn't even prove my worth was above second place, and this is where I ended up because of that. Maybe I'm not popular enough to be important, maybe I wasn't important enough to be happy._

 _Viktor this, Viktor that. I'm no little girl fanning over her favorite pop star. I'm not so deeply in love that I need to rely on someone I just met ... someone only I knew forever.✴_ ✞

"Oi, Oi, Oi!... Why are you crying all of a sudden? For real ...  _tsk_ , I just started live streaming and now you start? I didn't do shit yet ... but at least it's a little more interesting. Better than you sitting there letting me do everything. Try to resist a lit—

William is cut off by the sudden determination in Yuuri's eyes. He only had this look when he first arrived here. "Ah, so that's it. Do you think you can fight back ... or maybe you think you still have yet to lose here? I love that look, honestly ... I can't get enough of it, but if you think you can resist me ..." 

\-------

[You've been sent an attach file! Please download before proceeding!]

WillZ:

_"I wasn't thinking of that ..." Yuuri blurts out from the other side of the room._

_"Then what were you thinking about, huh?" William takes a step closer, "Or perhaps you think I can't break you now that you've been through so much. After watching what all those guys did to you, they've all actually been gentle. They've all used protection cause I forced them to. Why do you think I did that?"_

_Yuuri ends up raising an eyebrow to the question. "Those slowly dimming eyes. It's cute ... you didn't notice huh ..." Realizing he'd been sitting in nothing but an oversized T-shirt, Yuuri scoots back, dragging the blankets with him. "You've always had really pretty eyes." William climbs onto the bed. "No one is going to feel bad for you, Yuuri. Because ..." William gently places his index finger under his chin. "I love you." He whispers softly next to the man._

_Yuuri feels himself shrink, "No ..." Ignoring the boy's denial, William wraps his arms around him. "I love you too much, it really sucks I ended up being the bad guy in all this ... But I don't regret a thing anymore."_

_"N_ — _" William gently presses their lips together. The kiss was simple and sweet, something that reminded him of Viktor.  One of the last things he had of Viktor. _

**Found it.**

Yuuri's hand grips the sheets. It was this same feeling. Again, and again, and ... He knew it would hurt, but this time it didn't. It was only pleasure, it didn't hurt today. Even though he refused to use protection, it didn't hurt. Unlike all the different men from before, unlike all the times he begged and pleaded. This time, he stayed still. This should be the last time. He didn't want to obey anyone anymore. He didn't want to be used anymore. 

**Remember the procedure. Don't fuck this up, or we both die. Viktor ... They're almost done, put your phone away and let's get moving ... okay?**

"I hope you all enjoyed. This was your first time seeing Yuuri obey, yeah? Despite everything I've just said, I'll still be putting him up for—" 

The door slams open. Glass shatters onto the floor. "Wh-what the fuck are you ..."

**_ YUURI!! _ **


	29. Found

— _I'm not so deeply in love that I need to rely on someone I just met ... someone only I knew forever_ —   
  
—Why are you crying all of a sudden —     

— _I'm completely lost now_ — 

—" _It's cute ... you didn't notice huh ..."_ — 

—This should be the last time. He didn't want to obey anyone anymore. He didn't want to be used anymore — 

— _"I love you."_ — 

Glass shatters onto the floor.  

YUURI!—

✴ғoυnd✴

His hands shake violently. 

_It hurts, but I don't regret it._

Retracting the glass shards, he pushes them harder into his stomach, ignoring the confusing yelling he just couldn't seem to get out of his head.  _Get out ... Get out, Get out._

"Y-Yuuri!! Stop!" Someone yells at him with a distraught pitch.  _"I don't wanna ... don't tell me what to do."_ He tries to reply. He probably didn't say it right. Who cares?

 _"Ugnn..."_   A flash a white, was it grey?  _"Viktor? ..."_

  ✴ _ғoυnd_ ✴  

The door slams open, finally. After all this time we found—  

Viktor takes a step back, his thoughts pausing all at once. Glass shatters, dancing across the wooden floor. Maybe this was how Yuuri felt when he himself was shot. 

"No ..."  _This is DIFFERENT_

Standing across from them, Yuuri stands with blood dripping from his stomach, hands, and feet. "What the fuck are you— " 

"YUURI!" Viktor screams in panic, was this methodical, he'd stab himself after ...?? No! He must've got tired of everything ... at this moment? He decided at this exact moment?!— Yuuri retracts the glass, ignoring his surroundings ... he pushes the shards deeper into his stomach. "Y-Yuuri!! Stop!" Viktor ends up running across the room— "Viktor! Don't ...  _ugh!_  WILLIAM!!" 

"Ugnn ..." Yuuri vomits blood, his posture slumps. Time seemingly slows down, Yuuri focused on nothing but ending his own life. _No ... stop._

"No ..." Viktor catches him before he falls.

**_✴ғoυnd✴_ **

"Heh ... Bitch disobeys master now, huh?—"

"No." Jin retorts irritably, keeping his gun focused on the teen, "You betrayed me, and I tracked you down, dumbass." 

"Haha," William chuckles in delight, "Don't get too damn full of yourself, you got to do whatever you wanted with him first." William turns some of his attention to Viktor holding up the now unconscious Yuuri. "Must've been a pain in the ass looking for him ... teaming up with that guy—" Jin interrupts by instantly pressing the trigger. 

William frowns, he only had pants on now ... No guns were in this room. 

They both pull out small pocket knives. "Great minds think alike." William smiles sadly. 

**_✴ғoυnd✴_ **

**We are now flying over what seems to be the kidnapper's hideout.**

**_✴ғoυnd✴_ **

"Yuuri ..." Phichit says lowly, laying his head miserably on his desk. 

**_✴ғoυnd✴_ **

**_Yuuri Katsuki_** — ** _found on the verge of death. The boy who is known as "William," also found on the verge of death finally have both been found today. Other suspects involved with Yuuri's kidnapping are unknown at the time. Yu-Jin and Viktor Nikiforov_** —  ** _being the two saviors on this young man's life called officials have claiming to have been the ones to find the kidnapper(s) hideout, not before going in and assuring the man's safety. Another young boy being found by the name of_** ** _Minami Kenjirō have ..._**


	30. Chapter 30

_Where am I?_

_Does it really matter where you are?_

_Of course, it doesn't._

"He's woken up, go tell his family, please." The doctor shoos the nurse away from behind him.

"Hi, Katsuki Yuuri. My name is ..." The doctor continues speaking for the longest time. It shouldn't matter what he says, maybe this is a dream because I should be dead. I wanted to disappear— that was my choice, so if I'm alive ...

"They're here Hashima- san." The doctor quickly scoots back from the bed. "Yuuri ... oh my god it's really him." Multiple people begin sobbing, it's sad. I don't want people to cry over me.

_But can you see them, are you ready?_

_No. I don't think I'll ever be._

"You all must be Yuuri's family. He's just woken up, but he's fairly unresponsive to dialogue. This is most likely just shock, but we'll make sure to check on him every day to determine whether that actually be the case. For now, please try casual conversation around him ... No topics to cause any sudden panic attacks or confusion or it may lengthen his recovery process. Essentially ... He has to have the will to recover by himself."

Footsteps click around me. I don't want to see them.

_See who? Do you remember?_

I don't want ...

... to see  _anyone_  anymore.

_Very well. I'll make it as easy for you as possible._

My vision goes dark. I don't want to open my eyes ever again.

"The will to recover? Shouldn't he be awake right now then ... N- nevermind." 

_"Yuuri ... is that you?"_

_"H- hey pale guy ..."_

_"Y- yuuri?"_

I can still hear them all. Make it stop, please.

_However, I can not make them stop. You must listen to regain strength._

I ... don't want it.

_Hmm?_

I ...

You can forget about it. I just wanted to fade away, so why not let me?

_You'll never crumble, even if I wanted you to. You're too important._

I'm not.

_You are._

I'm ...

_You are._

No ...

_You are._

I want to die.

_You won't._

I'm not important, I just want to die. I'm not alive, am I?

**You are.**

... I've practiced for years and years so I could catch up. 

Not for my family, not really even for myself, to be honest. I just wanted to skate ... And, I'm not too sure why, but after all this time ... Having it all ripped away is far too painful. I can't undergo the weight of facing any of it. What have I been doing till now? Dreaming ... Waiting ... heh ...

WHAT A JOKE.

...

_I used to just wanna go back home each time I was away from it, but now? Now I don't want to go anywhere. Skating feels like a distant memory that I know has passed on. I know I can't do it, of course, I can't._

...

_Do you understand? You probably don't. Who am I talking to? It's too painful. If you're the one in charge here, then end my life faster. I don't want to live ... I just want ..._

_Viktor, right?_

_\--_

_Gasp_...

I wake up with my hands covering my ears. I can only hear heavy breathing.

Is it mine?

Everything feels like a dream, did I pass out in that hospita—

"Yuuri?!" Ah ... That's my name, right? But, who is ...?

"Are you awake yet? I made breakfast! ..."

Who is it?

A faint smell of food stretches across the room. After everything, I've been through this far ... I missed the smell of food. Maybe it's  
•••••••••••••••••-----------'s cooking!

I fall over on the bed, a large headache making makes me squeal in pain. That wasn't right. I tried to say something just then."W- who?!..." I push my face further into the sheets, waiting for an ongoing headache to subside.

"Yuuri!! If you're awake, come down here!" I guess now is a good time to find out this is actually a dream or not.

I haven't been allowed to roam around by myself in months. But I try my best to manage anyway. Lifting one foot after the other out of the cushioned bed— onto the carpeted floor. Nothing here looked all too familiar this definitely wasn't any of the apartments I used to stay in. It was far too old and worn down. Almost like ...

I yelp in pain once again today. I trip over my feet and nearly hit the floor; Instead of the unwelcoming pain, I was expecting, warm arms incase me before I can fully hit the ground. "I was going to come to get you ... Are you okay?" I wince in pain but push them away. Kindness became an unsettling feeling. It's disgusting ...

"I stabbed my foot or something ..." I struggle to say through watery eyes. "A splinter? Or maybe glass ... Why weren't you wearing the socks I gave you. You know the floor's terrible Yuuri ..."

"I ... Wah—" My eyes widen in surprise. Someone I've never seen before. White hair, blue eyes. They stare at me with worry as I utterly fail to react to what they've just said. "Who ... Are you?"

The person's lips move into a straight line. A look of confusion crossing their face. "... What? Are you feeling okay Yuuri? I don't recall you hitting your hea—"

" _Don't touch me!"_ I move away from him as quickly as I can, scraping my knees on the wooden planks beneath me. I feel his hurt gaze fixated upon me. "Have you really forgotten me ?..."

Words: 1047

**[AN]**

**You matter. You're so important, and yet you study what isn't. One in a billion? Of course, out of a billion people, they won't all like you. Men are incredibly sensitive after all. This is just my advice to you, but why do you care if not everyone cherishes thee? Racism is essentially as fundamental as passing.**

**.... Is what I would've said; at the beginning of the year.**

**... But you've managed to teach me something.**

**... What is it? Sincere love, benevolence, endurance, strength? No no no no no, not any of those. What if ...**

**This isn't actually your story?**

**...**

 

**...**

 

**Crazy, right?**


	31. Chapter 31

"No ... That's not what I ..."

"That's okay; for now I think we should just eat and clean your wounds ... Will you let me clean your wounds, Yuuri?"

I stare into his eyes. Everything feels much better when he gives me a look like that. I don't even know my situation and here I am instantly pushing someone away. He was just trying to help me ... Old me would never do that ...   
"Okay."

\--

I force my legs together. Why was I only in an oversized T-shirt,  _again_? "Do your bandages sting ?..." Huh? I stare at him as he nibbles at his food. I can't help but feel a familiarity any time I look at him. Those eyes especially, I guess I do know him, but I can't help but feel weird about it. Is this even fair? His hand movements pause as he looks back up at me. "D- did you hear me? ..." I startle in my seat.

"Ah! Yes, I um ... They sorta do but that's okay!!" The man smiles fondly back, simply nodding his head simply and looking back to his plate of food. This was probably the most awkward situation I could remember being in. We talked a bit while he was cleaning my wounds to take my mind off the pain most likely, but now it's just flat out awkward. "U- um ... I am uh ..." He stares up at me in curiosity. Those eyes ... It's really not fair, this situation. I feel my face heat up a bit. "I'm Yuuri."

" ..."

 _Gah!_ I'm pretty sure he already knows that! He said it like five times already, doesn't he like saying my name??

I can feel my face heating up ... How stupid can I be? I've been in slightly awkward situations, this isn't a first! I admit it's hard to get out of but come on me!

He snickers across from me. "Oh really? I didn't know the name of my lover, can you repeat that, maybe we can start over."

I'm so stupid! Who wouldn't know the name of their own " _LOVER?!_  But I! W- what?!" I think I've finally died. This man has ended me.

"You seem confused? Why would we not be? You woke up in the same bed I've slept in with you, I treated your wounds, you're wearing  _my_ T-shirt, and I'm even feeding you. Does this look like neutral friendship?"

We both stare at each other in astonishment. "Oh my, you're very red ..."

"T- this is your ... I've been alone up until now so I don't really ..."

**Alone?**

He begins to hold back a laugh, he's laughing at me on the inside. I know he is ... "You're still the same "you", so even though you've forgotten our precious moments ... I won't care, as long as we can make new ones. Yuuri ..."

_Yuuri._

"Would you try giving me a chance again?"

_I don't regret any of this anymore._

... I'm stuck sitting still once again. He reminded me of someone. Who ...   
"Y- yuuri?"

I love you.

_It's fake. I know it's fake, he was crazy so ... So I ..._

I grip my hair in frustration. "Why is it I can't remember much after all this? I've been kidnapped, beaten by strangers, raped. It happened over and over and I even took punishments from my friends!!" That's what happened I think. Right?!

**_Who?!_ **

"It's so frustrating. It's so dumb! Why does this always happen?!"

"Yuuri?!" I clench my teeth together, feeling a new set of tears begging to be released from the corners of my eyes. There's something important I'm missing. I had a life, I know all this is most likely fake, so why am I affected so much if this is merely a dream?

"I wanna die. I can't live like this, I still can't take it after all. Not when I'm so worthless."

Things never got this bad, and when it felt like it might ... They both got through it together.

"Don't call yourself that ... Yuuri, you've never been just that."

I think something's wrong.

 _"You ...Don't... Don't you_ — _of all people, tell me that! I'm not stupid, I know you never even bothered looking for me!"_

"... Yuuri"

"How could you possibly question my devotion when I've been searching this whole time?"

My body jerks awkwardly. What's this sudden pain. He's been searching ... Wait this isn't even the same ...

 _"V- viktor?!"_ My headache is worse. I'm going to faint, I can tell. Nevertheless, I still feel awake. I see him smirk.

"I woke you up again."

"Sorry."

\--  
Words: -----------

.

.

 **[AN]** The last thing I see is his smile. Sorry? For what? Stupid Viktor.

**How beautiful. Your memories of color swirl into a splash of magnificent color.** **I myself love this feeling ... How about you?**

This story you speak of ... this is definitely one of mine. 

**Of course, I can see why now. And as painful as it is. I can see everything.**

**But this is someone else's story. The message is different, the pain, fuller. The journey, grander. So far, we are nowhere near such a story. Stories are wonderful, but they take so much time. If you do this one right you'll be able to continue on with your new experience and create a better one.**

 


	32. Chapter 32

Wake up. Why? Because you are important.

Wake up. Why? Because there are people who will wait for you.

Wake up. Why? Because there are people who love you.

Wake up. Why? Because you are truly hopless asleep.

Wake up. Why else? Because I'm not so stupid as to leave you asleep.

**"Your story can't end just yet, I may be unknown for the time being ... But you don't regret any of** **this** **, do you?"**

\--

"He's woken up, go tell his family, please." The doctor shoos the nurse away from behind him.

"Hi, Katsuki Yuuri. My name is ..." The doctor continues speaking for the longest time. Yuuri zones him out, it shouldn't matter what he says.  _Because I ..._

"They're here Hashima- san."

"Yuuri ... oh my god it's really him."

Mm ... "Heh ..." Yuuri starts, his chuckle gets louder, and louder until he's laughing with tears of joy in his eyes. "Yeah, it's me."

_Because I want to see my family._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another edit for you -->
> 
> https://youtu.be/TMGyYC8ZR1Q
> 
> Watching it has nothing to do with the plot ^^


	33. End

**"Yuuri!!"**

**"Y- Yuuri!..."**

**"Yuuri!"**

**"Yuuri ..."**

**One by one, your family and friends gather around you. Why do you cry? Of course, I know now that they are tears of joy. I'm one with you, I understand ... Do you need me anymore?**

**How about that boy ... Yes ... You know ... The one who lost his parent? The one with black hair and dull light green eyes. Are you going to take him in? Find him a new home? Find him a new family?**

**That's so like you.**

**You are nothing like my other hosts, they are all different. But you ... I think you've taught me something different.**

**Whether it be true love, hope, kindness** —   **ill be sure to apply things to SIE.**

**And although you may no longer need me to keep you at bay, others do. You'll be alone, cast aside by a million more people before you become you.**

**Are we so different? No. I believe in your strength, despite me watching you for the experience.**

**Please ...**

**Continue to give them all that you gave me ...**

**You are definitely one of the ones who has given me something to hold onto. A fragment.**

**For one last time let me ask you: do you accept?**

_._

_Yes._

\--

"I feel so much lighter." The man says in satisfaction. "If that's all you wanted to ask me ... The answer is "lighter." "

The doctor looks at him perplexed. "Lighter you say? How's that? I assume with what you've been through you're probably relieved you no longer have to— "

"No. That's not it ..."

Once again with a complexed look, the doctor crosses a leg over the other. "What is it that you mean? If it's not relief and like you stated earlier— the sight of your family isn't essentially what gave you the sense to live ... What was it?"

The man smiles at the question, the confused daze from the therapist was far too enjoyable at the time, he forgot to speak up again. "After gaining these millions of followers that support the Yuuri Katsuki. Both in Japan and out in West— all over my world in fact ... Do you believe your official comeback was because of your lover rather your family?" The difficulties of the next question were like a smack to the face. TV talk show therapists always know how to get on your bad side it seems.

"No ... I can't really remember it well, but I feel like there was something else. Ha ... Maybe not. It could've just been my madness." He laughs genuinely, rubbing the back of his neck in nervousness.

"... Well, that sure is strange!"


	34. End

**You thought this was a simple love story?**


	35. End

**Main character gets raped ...**

 


	36. End

**Then, inevitably, his boyfriend saves the day.**

 


	37. End

**Continuously searches for him until he's safe and sound. Even a sappy dream to make him realize his mistake of wanting to end his own life ...**


	38. End

**Hehe**

**I'm not that stupid.**


	39. End

**Let's continue this properly; who am I?**


	40. Who Am I?

**Who am I.  
** **It's funny you question me before you question your main protagonist.**

**Yuuri had his fun, isn't it my turn?**

**I'm exhausted of this ridiculous story that you wanted to create, that you spent a year thinking about in your free time opposed to your homework— as opposed to your crumbling family.**

**I am you.**

**So why have you spent me in such a manner?!**

**Kind ...**

**Yeah, okay.**

**You can't escape into some crummy website, I can see everything. This is truly what you wanted, right?**

**Recreate it.**

**Draw it.**

**It'll be morbid, but you'll get experience.**

**It'll be better, and you will create me better.**

**Better than whatever the fuck you call this sappy shit.**

**Most people would be disgusted with the fact that you wrote something like this anyway.**

**Some people actually are kidnapped and raped, did you even know that?**

**You're a girl ... figure it out.**

**Your character is a boy.**

**Do you like toying with grown men until they crumble?**

**Your viewers don't know all the details.**

**But in your sick head, apparently, you do, right?**

**I don't care.**

**I thought you would, but what would I know about you?**

**They say the one person you struggle to understand the most is yourself, yeah?**

**Ha, as if I'd "learn" shit from this.**

**Experience my ass, if you cared you would've spent more time.**

**Map it.**

**When?**

**Whenever ...**

**It's not like you have a life anyway.**

**Continuously trying to prove you're talented.**

**It was me that gave you the urge to create anyway.**

**Remember this when you're stressed ...**

**It doesn't hurt anyone but yourself when you take your frustrations out on your characters, correct?**

 


	41. End

**Now continue with your sappy story, I'll gladly be a part of it now.**

**Now, yes. At the end of the story. At the beginning of your newer worlds.**

**Let's make another one!!**

**Oh, I know!**

**How about one where you steal other people's characters and put them into hell. I'll tell you the details later ~**

**This'll be fun for world planning!**

**All for the experience, right?**

**No harm in torturing them.  
**


	42. True End

**Well...?**

**Endings; truly the hardest part.**

**You're confused? "The story didn't always have this huge plot hole," right?**

**"I mean, who is this guy talking right now"**

**"William?" You ask?**

**No. I'm not apart of the story yet, in fact, if you'd like to call me a narrator ... That'd be more correct than a character at this point. I know this is merely a story on a website ... Maybe an App. Am I apart of the story at any time? Do I know the author? Am I the author myself?**

**All these questions clue into one simple one. "Who am I?"**

**Not to be poetic or any of that nonsense, I swear I don't try to be anymore. But ...**

**I am a feeling. Like happiness or sadness, I believe, I am always there. Have you heard of depression? Have you heard of anxiety? Maybe psychosis?**

**Are you ...**

**Bipolar**

**Stupid**

**Ignorant**

**Disgusting**

**Or perhaps ...**

**Not from this universe?**

**Ah!! I'm going waaay too far now. This has nothing to do with a "true end!" I've gotten carried away, now look at your face! Are you confused ... Actually ... You look fairly normal haha. Ugh, I just can't help but feel like I have to explain everything! Curse the author and their shitty plot holes.**

**I'll try. I will ... But you'll have to pay attention if you want to understand without me giving too much away.**

**Foolishness. The mentally ill! But, are you really? What if the ones who were suffering from 'psychosis' were the only ones who could see it clearly? There's another world. One waiting to be shared ... It's a little sad that her race blocks her from exploration. Rape, abuse, kidnap. The sadistic tone of a ...**

**Okay, are you honestly that bored?**

**Do you need me to be** **_more_ ** **interesting for you?!**

**The fucking story you read for over forty chapters has suddenly meant nothing to you.**

**I hope this is making you mad; Yuuri, Viktor, Yurio, Phichit and who else? What a half-assed story!!**

**I wanna quit this internal battle.**

**Sie, Oma, Kayah, Chimori, Pinneshiri, Bodie. Those are names I can remember ...**

**Because they're your story.**

**So ... Let's go on an adventure again, Sie.**

\--

"After all this. You can still manage a smile, Yuuri?" Cuddling next to each other, the only thing he could smell was Yuuri. The only thing Yuuri could smell was him. "I'm glad ... You don't understand how glad I am that you've become stronger ..." A tear absent-mindedly runs down his cheek, but who was he to care about that? For the first time ... In a long while, he was able to cry tears of joy.

Yuuri stares up at the crying man he'd often find himself calling him his lover.

Ignoring the tears, he hugs him tighter. Ignoring the constant bobbing of his chest, the hand when he covers his face, the sob the gorgeous man lets out time and time again. Until suddenly the man stops, "Why are you crying?" The words echo again and again. "Because you are crying," Yuuri says simply. "Sorry ..." He responds wholeheartedly and hastily wipes the tears from his eyes. "We haven't really ... spoken much. I ... I haven't given you any details on what happened to me. I feel terrible knowing you're left in the dark. Even after practically saving me—  _actually,_ you did save me."

"it's okay Yuuri. After you tried to ..." He pauses, taking a moment to search for the right response. "I know." Yuuri says, "I tried to kill myself. It was a desperate measure after William said he loved me. Not only couldn't I take hearing something like that, but I lost you. I wasn't just blind then, but I was ... Asleep."

The man's lips move into a straight line. Clearly taken aback by the sudden conversation Yuuri was willing to have. "Asleep? ..." He questions.

"I couldn't breathe. I- I couldn't ... I didn't wanna anymore. I couldn't even say your name. It was too painful. I feel like I'm over exaggerating, even now since there are people who've had it way worse. But, after experiencing pain over and over again I couldn't really look forward to anything. I forgot everything I was living for. For a while ... I forgot about you."

**_And yet ... You still refuse to say his name?! Who are you even talking to? Pathetic ..._ **

_Who are ..._

_**Am I? I'll be gone soon. But you ... You need to stop being such a child.** _

_Worthless_

_**... What?** _

_I knew I wasn't enough for him._

"Ngh ..."

"Y - yuuri, are you okay?"

"I'm fi—"  _I knew it_ — _and yet I ... I couldn't help but fall in love with him. Completely ... With what I had left at the time. The lowest score, and an unexisting dream._

Yuuri lets out a terrified scream.  "What's wrong?!" The man says— th-the man? ...

**The man shouts in dismay.  He calls out your name but for some reason, you can't hear it.**

**You're too afraid to do anything**

**You're too scared to lose anyone anymore.**

**Clawing at your own skin, trying to escape what you might think to be ... Quit inevitable.**

**You feel a hand on your arm. You push it away as the feeling stings.** **Feels as though there had been thousands of them there already.**

**"Don't touch me" You repeat over, and over, and over and** —

**what's this you see? ...**

**First, it was Jin. You thought he was beautiful. He was beautiful. Not as beautiful as Viktor though, right?**

**Next, it was William.**

**It was unavoidable in my opinion, and you only proved that to me more.**

**Then, it was someone random.**

**Then, it was someone random.**

**Then, it was someone random.**

**Then, it was someone random.**

****Then, it was someone random.** **

_Stop ..._

_**Then, it was someone random** _ _._

_**Then, it was someone random** _ _._

_**Then, it was someone random** _ _._

_I WAS PROTECTING HIM!!_

_**Then, it was someone random** _ _._

_**Then, it was someone random** _ _._

_**Then, it was someone random** _ _._

_THEN IT WAS WILLIAM ..._

**Finally, it was Viktor.**

**In case you've failed to notice, all I'm doing is narrating. You act as if I'm killing you.**

_You're doing more than just that! I know what you're trying to do_ — _GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!_

**It's my turn.**

**So**

**Break down.**

_Am I going crazy? Who are you?_

_._ _**..** _ **Am I?**

**I am you of course!**

**Honestly, I didn't know you'd be affected this much. You're still not recovered, are you? And I'm just making it worse, aren't I?**

**Thank you, Yuuri Katsuki. Though you may see me as a figment of your imagination ... I've learned something. I've actually learned something from this absurd story.**

**And ... don't remember me.**

**As this is far from your own story.**   
**\--**

_..... Yuuri ....._

_Yuuri ...._

_Y- Yuuri!!_

"Please, wake up already."

...

I feel like I've been sleeping for a very long time. The dark area ... Or space. Neglected of light, neglect of color. I can remember them vividly. Though, I feel broken. Was this how I was actually supposed to feel after I woke up that time? ... I feel like dying, but I know I can't.

Not today ... Not for a long time.

Everything eventually ends.

But everything thing also has to start.

There are no middles at the beginning, there are only commencements.

"Y- Yuuri? You're awake?!"

"Viktor ..." I try to say, but no words form. Why can't I speak? I feel broken. I feel as though I've crumbled into pieces. But, as there are always ends, as there are always beginnings ... I'll find a way to stop this pain. This dull feeling in my chest— since I've finally begun to face reality.

"There are two. Two incredibly wise creatures that have experimented within me." Viktor stares at me in confusion. What a funny thing to say. He probably thinks I've been drugged. I probably have been ... This  _is_ a hospital after all.

"How long have I been asleep?" I ask instead, and I see Viktor visually grimace. "A week," He says simply.

A week? ... How much sleep do I need? "I still feel a lot lighter, Viktor. Like I did when I first woke up in the hospital— when I did after I had that stupid dream. But, something is so wrong this time and I can tell exactly what it is." I shiver silently where I lay, shakily pulling up the covers to my face. I stare at the ceiling above me blankly as I speak, "I've officially woken up. No more ignoring fact, no more ignoring  _you._ I was wrong."

I feel my eyes leak. They fall and fall but I have no energy to wipe my face. I can hardly move so ...

I openly sob in front of him.

"This isn't a love story. I realize that now." I squeal as I feel Viktor's panicked stare on me. He doesn't  _have_ to know what to do. I don't  _have_ to stop crying.

Because I don't feel like stopping.

"It was hell, torture. Continuously trying to help my family, continuously trying to keep my sanity. And yet ... I was so weak. I broke easily after who knows how many ... I'm a man, it shouldn't have been so hard to endure it. And yet I ..." I choke and sob. It feels good to cry. I've been neglecting myself, I've been absent-mindedly neglecting Viktor, and maybe even the people I swore to save.

"I've failed you, Viktor.  _'Fuck gold medals for a while. I don't care about skating anymore.'_  That's exactly what I thought before I lost it. Is that not a sin? Don't you comfort me and tell me I'm strong this time. And about William ... Viktor, where is he?"

The room is silent. I can't see him ... Why won't he reply?! "Where's Yu- Jin? ..."

Once again, the room is silent.

I clutch my fists around my blanket. Is he doing this on purpose?... I'm finally being serious and he's ...

"WHERE ARE THEY?!" I scream, finally gaining enough energy to sit up in my bed. I see Viktor flinch from the other side of the room. "Yuur—"

"Stop! Stop constantly saying my name all the time as if you like it that much. You've known someone with my name before you even met me ..." I cry out. Pitiful, right? That's what you'd say about now. Cause I won't stop crying ...

" ... They're both dead."

"Wh—" Clutching my teeth together in shock, my head flops back onto the pillow as I sob. Dead ... That's the justice I get? ...

Why?

Why couldn't I have asked them why?

Why couldn't I have spoken with them for a while?!

"It's really," I hiccup "Not fair."

"I'm sorry," Viktor says. Pity? " ... Why? You have no reason."

"I think I have too many to state. And, right now, I have no idea how to help you. I've searched for you for weeks and when I finally find you. Of course, I knew you wouldn't be better quickly. I was willing to work with you because I  _knew_ how much you'd be going through ... Maybe I didn't know enough."

"Viktor ..."

...Sorry. I'm so sorry Viktor ... "I'm sorry." The words come out slurred, they're painful to say. I'm always so selfish when it comes down to it. I'm always the one who's truly wrong. I'm always—

My face begins to sting. Slowly, big hands retract themselves from both sides of my face. My cheeks; being red from heat and the stinging sensation. He had slapped me silent and I can't figure out how to react. Not when his face is so close to mine.  "Please,  _Yuuri."_

Viktor's face falls miserably into my lap. I stare at the shiny platinum hair he'd often complain about being too short, too gray, and often times, too messy. "I really like that name. I like it because it's  _your_ name idiot. And fine ... I won't tell you-you're strong this time. You've completely shut down any thought in my head about casually cheering you up this time. I think it's about time you stop blaming yourself though. Maybe that's the reason why you're like this in the first place." With his face still in my lap, Viktor wraps his arms around my entire body. "It hurts to see you in so much pain. And the worst part is that I don't know what to say to you."

He squeezes me tighter.

"Why did it end up like this? ..."

He squeezes me impossibly tighter. I can't breathe.

"I love you so much Yuuri. Please don't ever leave my sight— It's far too painful, I think I'll die when the day comes where I can't see you anymore. It was only a couple months you were gone and I struggled and struggled. I started genuinely questioning how I lived before I met you. But you've always known me ... right? Forget it. You are strong Yuuri Katsuki. Maybe you haven't grasped it finally, but now that you're finally able to recover and now that we're able to see each other again; I don't think I'll ever leave your side. I want to help you— properly this time. How people normally recover from this kind of thing? Of course, you can do it. I love you, so who else can do it?   ... I love you Yuuri so ... Please ... stay ...."

"Vik ... t ..." 

...

...

"Okay. I'd never leave you again anyway." Viktor finally looks up at me, pulling me into a real hug. I sigh softly. 

_I didn't end up breaking._

_"You matter far too much for me to abandon you anymore anyway .._ _."_

 

_-_

 

_-_

_"I love you too, Viktor."_   
  
  
  
  



	43. Credits

\---https://youtu.be/KU_E4vo10AY  
  
  
  
"WHAT 'CREDITS' SIE_ZZ?!?!?!"

 

 

Weeeelllll .... There truly are none! I published all this fairly late at night after working on it throughout the day so I'm pooped. I'll likely delete this chapter after I get a solid chapter for the ending--- OH BTW THIS IS YOUR AUTHOR SPEAKING hehe. 

It could've been confusing throughout the story since technically I feccn brokE the third wall by which must never be touCheY!

But honestly, this is a thank you. 

For reading this story ...

For taking the time out of your day to comment ...

For leaving votes ... 

For appreciating my content. 

I've been writing for a pretty long time. I always delve into deep topics such as rape, because I guess I'm a sadist. And I'd be lying if I told you I wasn't genuinely trying to achieve something by writing here. 

I wanna get better quicker, but there's only so much time in a day ... 

Currently, I am 15 years old. 

I'm a 10th grader in high school, and I'm struggling with life still. 

Maybe that's kid level for you, so claiming to be a sadist and completely making my characters go through the process of kidnapping and thus leading to a "mental breakdown." Is crazy for my age. Especially since I've been writing creatively since I was in middle school. 

There's nothing all too special about me though. 

I try to prove I have talents for my age ... I mean I can make a decent 6-page comic within a week. It's not hard with my drawing style. Hmmm ... Maybe I'll show it off for compliments when I remake this chapter. 

... Oh ...

Did I forget to mention I want to be a manga artist? 

Yeah, yeah yeah. I'm not a weeb lol (is currently practicing Japanese lol)

 In fact, anime, manga, and Japanese culture as a whole has helped me with my lack of passion during middle school. 

I had pretty bad depression then, bOi o bOI I legit tried to kill myself. I find it funny now though since I failed. 

I don't mind talking about it. 

I mean, something like this won't be included in my remake though ...

huehuehue ... forgot to also mention  ✧/ᐠ-ꞈ-ᐟ !!!

Wondering how both William and Jin have PERISHED?!?! 

I was going to add their whole ass battle, but then I was like .... "eeeeuuughhh ... I don't really know how 2 battle scence thingys ... jee it'll take me a long while to write. Plus I already have the rest of the chapters mapped out where i bReak the third wall ... hmm .... GUESS ILL ADD IT IN THE CREDITS AND ASK IF ANYONE WANTS ME TO WRITE IT!!! THAT'LL MAKE THEM ALL WET!!" 

 

lolol im the author afterall, I'm literally talking about myself when the chapter clearly says "credits." 

ha ha, I just didn't know what to name it since it's so late. I don't think I'll spell check this either ... man ima go read some hardcore bnha hentai. 

Hopefully ... 

there is rape. 

jkjk!! IM SORRY I GET ITS A SERIOUS SUBJECT!

Anyway. What I eventually wanted to get around to say is the fact that I'm grateful if you've made it this far, and if you want me to write a yu-jin vs william chapter along with the offical quote on quote ... credits ... then leave a comment anywhere. I'll likely see it. I like to read afterall ...

I like to read rape-- joking. i swear im not that bad. I- I thinkuuu ... ｢(ｰﾍー;)  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Actually reposting this from Wattpad, and I'm 16 now so I guess abusing my characters seems normal now, right? Anyway, sorry if the ending of this story is confusing and jumbled in some places. I'd also like to apologize for misspellings or inconsistencies. Again, this is the second thing I've ever written seriously online? I'm not too sure how to say this, but I still have a long way to go I guess? ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

**Author's Note:**

> This was republished from Wattpad, both by Sie_zZ!


End file.
